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Dad Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Do you have a car – but no gas money?
Just fаrт in your wallet! Tadaaa – gas money!

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Dad Jokes

Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.

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Dad Jokes

Two walls arrange a date – “Let's meet at the corner.”

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Dad Jokes

Working in a crematorium, you can never urn a living.

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Dad Jokes

What do you do when the phone rings and you get a private caller?
Don't answer that. Pick up for ranks Lieutenant and higher only.

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Dad Jokes Military Jokes

How much longer is the Amazonas compared to the Nile?
[Don't know]
By 4 letters.

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Dad Jokes

They are testing a revolutionary new blender, but they’re getting mixed results.

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Dad Jokes

A single glance tells me if somebody is lying. It’s the fact that they’re horizontal that gives it away.

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Dad Jokes

Did you know that UPS and Fedex are going into a merger? They will be called Fed-Ups now.

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Dad Jokes

Not even orcas dare attack an octopus.
It’s too well armed.

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Dad Jokes

I wanted to wear my camouflage jeans today but I just couldn’t find them.

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Dad Jokes

Cannibals aren’t very sociable. They’re all fed up with people.

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Dad Jokes Cannibal Jokes

I don’t know why people have a problem with wigs. It’s a look anybody can pull off!

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Dad Jokes

Two cows meet, one says,
"Mooooo!"
The other one is offended, "Hey, I just wanted to say that!"

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Dad Jokes

Two penguins meet. One says, “Jesus it is cold today."
The other hisses, “Shut up. Penguins can’t talk.”

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Dad Jokes

Why didn’t the Orange drive when the lights turned green again?
No juice!

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Dad Jokes

Do you know the most important words that could open a lot of doors in your life?
Push and Pull.

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Dad Jokes

I’ve never liked speed bumps much. But I’m getting over it slowly.

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Dad Jokes

Have you heard there was a kidnapping at the school?
[No]
But it’s fine now, the kid woke up again.

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Dad Jokes School Jokes

I was a doctor for a while but then I quit. I simply didn’t have enough patience.

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Dad Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes