Dirty jokes

Newest jokes in this category

I would like to have a word with you. The word is sеx.

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

I've been on the road a long time. I haven't really had the chance to see my girlfriend. She called me up; she wanted us to have phone sеx. I'm not really into phone sеx, but to make her happy, we had the phone sеx. It was really nice -- until I got the receiver stuck in my вuтт.

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

You're hotter than an anime chick.

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Dirty jokes

Surgeon:I'll er, I'll tell you something funny about Dr. Thomas, in his handwriting, the words tonsils and gеniтаls look exactly the same

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Dirty jokes

According to stories told by both fans and Nintendo most would assume that Mario would get Peach and Luigi would get Daisy right? well weather you think that or not lets assume that that is what is happening in the mushroom kingdom. If that is what is going on then wouldn't you assume that Mario would have the privilege of eating Peach's fruit and Luigi would have the privilege of de-flowering Daisy?

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Dirty jokes

I'm a voluptuous woman -- a big, beautiful woman -- I don't date no fат men. If you fат, please stay out of my face. What two fат people gonna do? Have a World Wrestling Federation match?

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Men jokes Fat Jokes

I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'

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God Jokes Dirty jokes

I'm like, 'You wastin' all this money on this woman. You can't touch her; you can't take her home -- what are you gettin' out of this?' So, he try to tell me, like it's logical:
'Well, for me, strippers -- they fulfill a fantasy.' So I asked him, 'Well, have you ever tried wavin' that same three, four hundred dollars in front of your own woman?' Oh, they quiet now. You put out $500, your girl gonna do some freaky things, trust me! Trust me! You won't even recognize her... Not only will you get a fantasy, you might get some groceries, too.

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Jokes about Women Money jokes Dirty jokes

Sсrеwing someone from work is great unless you work in a primary school.

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Office and Work Jokes School Jokes Dirty jokes

Aughter:
"Mommy Mommy, This Kid Jeff Told Me To Climb The School Flag Pole And I Did And He Gave Me Five Dollars!"
:Mother:
"Sweetie, He Just Wanted To See Your Underwear"
The Next Day...
Aughter:
"Mommy Mommy, Jeff Told Me To Climb The Flag Pole, And I didn't Wear My Underwear..."
:Mom:
"....."

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School Jokes Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

3 similarities between the World Cup and having sеx.
1. People take their shirts off and hug each other quite a lot.
2. Brazilians always look good.
3. You often see a lot of dribbling in the box.

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

So the diск looks at both of his ваlls and says guys there's a bangin party tonight and were gonna go so get ready to go in an hour, the ваlls tell the diск to fuск off we told u last time that we will never go out with u again. the diск says stop waisting time and get ready, the ваlls get рissеd and say look diск never again will we go with u cuz everytime we went anywhere u went in and left us outside hanging

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Dirty jokes

My girlfriend recently became a world famous роrn star.
She’s gonna be really angry when she finds out.

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Dirty jokes

I f*cked this chick last night. Apparently it was actually Jay Millard.

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Dirty jokes

Hey gurl, how about you make the Patriots and deflate these ваlls.

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Dirty jokes

Something to do when you're bored google роrn click the first option enjoy

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Dirty jokes

Your so hot
I am not
You turn me on
Then your gone
I try to touch
But there's no luck
I want mine in there
But you never share
Can you fit it in there
You probably don't care
Please can I try
But I'm to shy

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Dirty jokes

What do a silver medalist and a priest have in common?
They both came in a little behind

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Dirty jokes

I need you to check my ballcock.

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Dirty jokes

My husband, he goes, 'Ноотеrs is a family restaurant.' And I go, 'What do you think I am -- sтuрid? It has an owl theme: hoot, hoot.' And he goes, 'No, they have really good wings.' And I go, 'Oh, well, I go to this place called Ваlls. It's a family restaurant. All the waiters wear orange jockstraps, and they have really good nuggets.'

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Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes