Insult Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Guy 1: This park looked fun on the brochure! But it's ruввish! Guy 2: Guess it wasn't like it seemed to be...
Guy 1: Like your pen*s!!
Guy 2: Yup... I thought it was gonna be cursed... But I was blessed.

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Insult Jokes

Bully: Hey I bet I have more friends then you loser HA
Kid: Yep you know what... you do.
Bully: You wanna know why its cuz....
Kid: Yeah its cuz they all feel sorry for you.
Everyone Else: OOOHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Kid: What're you looking at?!
Me: At a mistake.

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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes

Me: *makes a flat joke*
Friend: Wow! Want a prize for that?
Me: Yeah, why not, I can just refund it and get the money you paid for it with
Friend: How 'bout I just punch you in the face? You can't refund that!
Me: No, I'll just return that.

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Money jokes Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Mom: Make your bed, Monica!
Me: Why I have to make it if Im going to sleep in it again?
Mom: Why do I feed you If I know your just going to die?
Me: Good point. Lesson Learned.

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Insult Jokes

If we were hauling any more trash into the ocean, we would have been boarded by Greenpeace.

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Insult Jokes

I saw a lady a few weeks ago at my gym... She was on the stationary bike, wearing a helmet. I was like, I have to do something here to mess with her; there's gotta be something I can do. I started looking around. I went to the pool, and I grabbed the life preserver ring off the wall. That ring thing I put around my head, and I got on the rowing machine next to her.

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Insult Jokes

When a guy says "suск it"always reply with "im sorry small objects are a choking hazard"

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Insult Jokes

Your breath is just as bad as your comebacks.

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Insult Jokes

Bully: *squirts water in your trousers*
Bully: HAHA! You wet yourself!
Me: Well, I made your mum wet last night

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Insult Jokes

Bully: LOL! I bet you haven't dropped yo воllоскs yet!
You: Ask your mother, I dropped em down her down throat yesterday.

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Insult Jokes

3 of the most difficult things to do in the world :
1. You can't count your hair.
2. You can't wash your eyes with soap.
3. You can't breath when your tongue is out.
Now please, put your tongue back inside.

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Insult Jokes

I would love to insult you... but that would be beyond the level of your intelligence.

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Insult Jokes

Comics are making fun of Asian people. It's not right. They know I'm goin' on the show. What's up with that? We're the only minority that gets made fun of while we're still in the room.

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Insult Jokes

Guy: Your d*ck is the size of a tic-tac
*Class goes oooohhhhhh!*
Nerd: Thts y your mom's mouth is so fresh

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Insult Jokes

Jeff: Im so popular
Bill: Nobody knows who you are
Jeff: YES THEY DO
Bill: knock knock
Jeff: Who's there?
Bill: Jeff Jeff: Jeff who?
Bill: EXACTLY

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Insult Jokes Knock-knock jokes

Jеrк: You're fат.
Me: And you're ugly, Atleast I can lose weight, but you're stuck with that ugly face.

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Insult Jokes Fat Jokes

Friend: Is that one of thoose ugly paintings that are worth a lot of money?
Other Friend: No it's called a Mirror
Friend: ..................

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Money jokes Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Me: Hey, do you eat bacon
Friend: Yes
Me: Cannibal!!

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

It's never sincere. There's always like a sarcastic subtext to it, you know? Like, what he's really saying is, 'What do you need, man who I would never in life consider having as a swim buddy?'
'What'll it be, guy who's probably terrible at every sport?'
'Can I help you, fella who's destined to spend the rest of his life drinking cheap whiskey, wearing a ratty blanket and hoping that someday the ghost dance will rise again like a native American Indian chief?'

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Sports Jokes Insult Jokes Men jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes