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Men jokes

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Son : Why is making love so enjoyable.
Father : It is just like the sensation when you are digging your nose with your finger !!
Why do women enjoy sеx more than man
It is because when you dig your nose, your nose feels more comfort than your finger.
Why do women hate it when they get rареd .
It is like when you are walking on the street,someone else come over and dig your no se, do you like it ??
Why woman cannot have sеx when they are having меnsтruатiоn?
If your nose is bleeding, do youstill dig it ??
Why man do not like to wear condoms when they are making love.
Do you like to dig your nose with a glove on your finger.
Why are making love carried out in private?
Will you dig you nose in front of your class? Sтuрid!
What is an оrgаsм ?
The same as sneezing. but the the other way round
Is it true that women love big diскs ?
Ever tried picking your nose with your thumb ?
What’s аnаl sеx?
Picking your ear
Are you digging enough???
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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes
Following a major hurricane, a man worked long hours clearing the jumble of trees that littered his family property. The longer he worked, however, the more painful it became for him to move his right arm.
He repeatedly ignored his wife's pleas to see the doctor until one night he yelped, "Ow! This is getting serious. I need to go see a doctor"
His wife then turned to him in concern. He added, "Now it hurts to push buttons on the remote control."
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Office and Work Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Men jokes
I was watching a really strange роrnо film.
I saw a fат ugly man crying and touching himself.
I then realised my TV wasn’t switched on
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Men jokes Sex Jokes Fat Jokes
I'm a grown аss man. If I'm even a little hungry, I'll go to a friggin' Carvel and buy an ice cream cake, just for a nibble, smear the rest on my face like a geisha, throw the remainder at a homeless person. Do you understand? I write my own rules. I take DayQuil at night. Do you get it?
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Food Jokes Men jokes
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop-N-Fresh, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to friends as Brown-n-serve. Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player.
Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Skippy.
The graveside was piled high with flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who "never knew how much he was kneaded."
Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes - conned by those who buttered him up. Still, even as crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions.
Fresh is survived by his second wife. They have two children and another bun in the oven.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
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Men jokes Friendship Jokes
I was present for all of their births. That's expected of men now. We gotta be there when the kids are born, and I'm still not sure what our role is in the delivery room. As far as I can tell, it's like waiting for your luggage at baggage claim. You just stand there and peer into that void. 'God, I hope that one's mine.'
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Kids Jokes God Jokes Men jokes
The first time I ever saw Boy George was on MTV, and I thought to myself, 'Now there is a -- I don't know. What the hеll is that?' Let's be honest, Boy George makes Michael Jackson look like the Marlboro Man.
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Insult Jokes Men jokes
A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.
He said, “I’m doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?”
She said, “Yes. My husband and I use it all the time.”
“And if you don’t mind me asking, what do you use it for?”
“We use it for sеx.”
The researcher was a little taken aback. He said, “Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child’s bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge. But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sеx. I admire you for your honesty. Since you’ve been frank so far, would you tell me in what manner you use it for sеx?”
The woman said, “I don’t mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it on the door кnов and it keeps the kids out.”
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Jokes about Women Kids Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes
A man and woman were having marital problems so they went to see a marriage counsellor.
The counsellor, in an attempt to find some common ground from which to begin his analysis said, “Tell me about anything the two of you have in common.”
The husband spoke up and said, “Well, neither one of us suскs diскs.”
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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes
Three men wanted to cross a river. They had no idea how to cross it, so one man knelt down on his knees and prayed "Lord give me the power and strength the cross the river." suddenly the man became very strong and swam across the river. The next man thought: if it worked for him, it'll work for me. So he knelt down and prayed "Lord give the skills and the strength to cross the river." the man built a canoe and rowed himself across the river. The last man thought: if it worked for both of them, I know it'll work for me. So he also knelt down and prayed “Lord give me the wisdom and knowledge to cross the river." He turned into a woman and walked across the bridge.
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Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes
An old man is afraid that his wife is loosing her hearing. So, he walks up right to her ear and asks, "Can you hear me?" She didn't answer. He walked up closer and asked again. But there was no answer. Finally he asked her one more time really loud and his wife said,
"For the third time yes!!!"
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Men jokes Old People Jokes
Why do men get their great ideas in bed? Because their plugged into a genius!
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Men vs Women Jokes Men jokes
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets оrаl sеx, no matter how bad it is.
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Men vs Women Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes
A guy is walking around an auction and sees a mirror going for $25,000 and finds a lady and asked why it was priced so high? She said the mirror will do whatever you ask it to. So the guy buys the mirror and takes it home, his wife is upset with how much money he just spent on the mirror. When he explains what the mirror does she's like okay let's try it out. Mirror mirror on the wall I want 34 dd and boom she grew large воовs! Then the man walks up and says mirror mirror on the wall I want a diск that touches the ground, boom his legs fell off!
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Money jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes
Erik Weihenmayer, the first blind man to reach the summit of Mount Everest has said the hardest part of his climb was the last two hundred metres.
“Dragging a frozen labrador’s a fсuкing nightmare.”
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News and Politics Jokes Men jokes
The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office. “What is your name?” was the first thing the manager asked the new guy.
“John,” the new guy replied.
The manager scowled, “Look…I don’t know what kind of a mamby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don’t call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last name only…Smith, Jones, Baker …that’s all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?”
The new guy sighed, “Darling. My name is John Darling.”
“Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is……”
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Office and Work Jokes Men jokes
The crazy man couldn't get through forest so he went through the psychopath
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Men jokes
American man needed blood for his heart surgery.
He got it from a poor Pakistani.
American gave him 5 million dollars. Once again American needed blood for surgery.
Pakistani was more than happy to donated blood again. This time, Amercan just gave him a kick. Pakistani asked the reason of coward selfishness.
American now replied: Now I also have Pakistani's blood in my body
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Men jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes
After visiting our house my mother-in-law got ambushed by 6 men who starting punching her. My wife shouted “Are you gonna help?”, I said “6 should be enough!”
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Men jokes Relationship Jokes
The "car way" of telling how far the relationship is:
- - Trying to impress the woman: unlocks and opens the door, waits for her to get inside, closes her door behind her.
- - Dating: the guy unlocks her door and then goes around to his side to get in.
- - Engaged: The man opens his door leans over and unlocks her door and opens it.
- - Married: The man gets in to the driver's seat, unlocks the doors, and says "Aren't you getting in?"
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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Relationship Jokes
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