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One-Liner Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
I'm seeking a new financial services provider for my deer friend. I'm looking for the most bank for my buck.
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One-Liner Jokes Banker Jokes
Many professional sculptors complain of extreme pain when listening to Clay Aiken.
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One-Liner Jokes
Hisspanics are afraid of snakes.
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One-Liner Jokes
Q. Why was there lipstick on the blonde's steering wheel?A. She tried to вlоw the horn.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Two kids are talking one day.
One asks the other, "What does your father do?"
"He's a lawyer."
"Honest?," the first asks incredulously
"No, just a regular lawyer."
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One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes
Did you hear about the blonde that almost caused a car accident? The spare tire in his trunk blew out.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde? It is the one with the kickstand.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
My girl wants to change the engagement rules. She tells me, Ваве, why do I got to wear a ring and let guys know Im taken, and you dont got to wear nothing? I told her, Ваве, I wear my sad face every day.
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One-Liner Jokes
Did you hear that the post office had to recall a recent stamp release?
The stamps had pictures of lawyers on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
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One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes
Wife: "What are you doing?"
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour."
Husband : "I was looking for the expiration date."
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Al Bundys abgelaufener Führerschein Πιστοποιητικό I got all dewy eyed when I saw my husband looking at our marriage certificate for half an hour. Mąż przegląda akt ślubu. Żona pyta: - Czego tam szukasz? - Terminu ważności. Der Mann starrt auf die Heiratsurkunde, dreht sie mehrfach um und wieder zurück. Darauf die Frau: "Sag mal, suchst du was? Hast du etwa wieder unseren Hochzeitstag vergessen?" Darauf der Mann:... Vrouw: "Wat ben je aan het doen?" Echtgenoot: "Niets." Vrouw: "Niets...? Je staart al een uur naar ons huwelijkscertificaat. Echtgenoot: "Ik zoek de vervaldatum. Sotia: - Iubitule ce faci? Sotul: - Nimic! Sotia: - Cum nimic? De-o ora tot studiezi Certificatul nostru de casatorie! Sotul: - Cautam data expirarii !
Marriage and Family Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q: What did the реnis say to the соndом?
A: "Cover me. I'm going in."
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- Vet du vad snoppen sa till kondomen? - Nej. - Täck mig, jag går in. Hvad sagde pikken til kondomen? “Cover Me, I’m Going in”
Men vs Women Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes One-Liner Jokes
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair
Guess who came crawling back
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One-Liner Jokes
Have you seen the current remake of the movie 'Cape Fear?'
It's about a deranged psychotic who is seeking revenge against a lawyer.
The question is, while watching the movie, for whom do you root?
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One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes
When Chelsea Clinton was eight, Hillary was reading one of her favorite fairy tales."Mommy," asked Chelsea, "Do all fairy tales begin with "Once Upon a Time...?"
"
"No, dearest," replied Hillary, "sometimes they start with 'Darling, I have to work a little late at the office tonight...'"
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One-Liner Jokes American Presidents Humor
Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor. Doctor: Oh, really? Mary: Yes, she tries to prevent me from making her take it!
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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Saw a great product advertised -- it was a hearing aid made to look like a Bluetooth headset. Its for people who are embarrassed about wearing a hearing aid but not about wearing a Bluetooth headset.
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One-Liner Jokes
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away all the W's!
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Blonde Loses Sweet Job ¿Por qué echaron a los gallegos de la fabrica de m&m's?. Q: Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory? A: For throwing out the W's Hvorfor blev blondinen fyret fra m&m fabrikken? – Fordi hun sorterede alle dem fra med W på.
Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Yo Momma Jokes
Chuck Norris runs until the treadmill gets tired.
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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Bobbie to neighbor: “What are you getting your children for Christmas?”
Neighbor: “Well, if my husband doesn’t stop staying out until three in the morning, I’ll give them a new dad.”
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One-Liner Jokes Christmas Jokes
I don't think any would stick. I shouldn't be spreading such bad puns and drive everyone nuts. Any one butter than me? Did you hear the joke about the peanut butter? I`m not teling you. You might spread it! Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? Because she`s nuts! How is a dumb blonde like peanut butter? They spread for the bread. I told my girlfriend I was breaking up with her because she had peanut butter legs. She asked,
"What do you mean?" I said,
"Your legs are nice and smooth and easy to spread like peanut butter." What`s the feepng you get after popshing a peanut? Post nut clarity. Why are peanuts afraid of going out? They`re afraid of getting a-salted. When can peanuts laugh? When you сrаск them up! What kind of sandwiches do sharks eat? Peanut butter and Jellyfish Where do peanut drivers go to fill their tanks? The Shell station! What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit? An astro-nut! What did applesauce say to peanut butter? You`re Nutty! Photo by Corleto Peanut butter on Unsplash
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
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