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One-Liner Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

In the days leading up to Christmas, people in San Francisco did everything they could to avoid the mauls, as they were a real zoo. The only people who weren't worried were lawyers with an escape claws.

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One-Liner Jokes Christmas Jokes Lawyer Jokes

An old lady at the bank asked me if I could help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.

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One-Liner Jokes Jokes about Women Old People Jokes Banker Jokes

Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool.

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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Where do you look for blondes' obituaries? Under "Home Improvements."

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I was really angry at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary!
I said, “Mark, my words!”

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One-Liner Jokes

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth.
Now when I talk, I have this weird axe scent.

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One-Liner Jokes

“I knew a chemist who use to periodically build tables.”

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One-Liner Jokes

Speaking to her two daughters, a mother said,
"When we get home you need to clean your bedrooms. Your grandmother is coming to visit us tonight and I want the whole house to look tidy."
The younger daughter answered, "We will, Mommy. But isn't that kind of like, lying?"

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One-Liner Jokes Grandparent Jokes

What does the Easter Bunny get for making a basket?
Two points, just like everyone else!

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One-Liner Jokes

Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a соndом? So she can have a doggie bag for later.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

(do this on your calculator.) one day there was a Blonde who thought her воовs were 2 2 big so she went to 37th street to building number 8 and talked to Dr. double 00. She left building number eight to find she was boobless. ( turn calculator upside down to see boobless)

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Boob Jokes

“A dentist in a court trial was оrаlly examined and re-examined by the defence lawyer ruthlessly, to extract the truth.”

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One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes Dentist Jokes

A man was out walking a dog, and a woman stopped to admirethe animal.
"What's your dog's name?" she asked.
"Неrреs," replied the dog's owner.
"How.... Odd," said the woman. "Why Неrреs?"
"Because he won't heel."

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One-Liner Jokes

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam; then I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replies:
"It's very simple. You're two tents."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

“A cannonball is a party for artillerymen.”

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One-Liner Jokes

All the British fans start singing to the German fans, If you won the war, stand up! Right, I think this is the greatest thing Ive ever heard at a sporting event because theres no snappy comeback for that, is there?

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One-Liner Jokes

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.
The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face.
The egg is frowning and looking a bit рissеd off.
The egg mutters, to no one in particular, "Well, I guess we answered THAT question!"

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One-Liner Jokes Sex Jokes

I think Employee of the Month is a good example of when a person can be a winner and a loser at the same time.

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One-Liner Jokes

Why did the blonde take his new scarf back to the store? It was too tight

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

There was a red head, a brunette, and a blonde riding in the back of a truck. Suddenly the tire popped and the truck drove off the edge into the water.
The red head and brunette swam up and survived, but the blonde drowned because she couldn't get the tail gate open.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes