School jokes, Teacher Jokes

Guy1: Your zipper is down.
Guy2: Ughh, your mom is so forgetful !

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Boy: hey I just saw your mom on t.v last night.
girl: really?!?!?! what channel?
Boy: Animal planet

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School Jokes Insult Jokes Animal Jokes

One day Jimmy got home early from school and his mom asked, "Why are you home so early?" He answered, "Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class." She said, "Wow, my son is a genius. What was the question?" Jimmy replied, "The question was 'Who threw the trash can at the principal's head?'"

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Marriage and Family Jokes School Jokes

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School Jokes

Teacher: Ok class I’m going to ask a question about your family.
Alex: Miss my Dad died In 9/11
Teacher: OH NO IM SO SORRY!
Alex: Don’t worry miss It was only Dad and besides he did what he wanted before he died.
Teacher: What was that?
Alex: Flew the plane.

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School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Aviation Jokes Dad Jokes

little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"

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School Jokes

A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”

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Animal Jokes Police Officer Jokes Aviation Jokes School Jokes

A teacher asks a boy in her class “If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?” The boy responds with “None.” The teacher asks why. “They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot.” The teacher says,
"The answer is 2, but I like the way you think. Later, the boy asks the teacher “3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is suскing it. Which one is married?” The teacher says “The one suскing it.” The boy says “No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think.”

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School Jokes Animal Jokes

One day I came home from school and said to my dad ‘I got expelled from school today’ he said ’ how’ I said I threw my book at the teacher’ he asked why’ I told him we were doing an anti-bullying program and my teacher said words can’t hurt me so I threw my dictionary at her. ’

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School Jokes Dad Jokes

A mugger jumps out in front of a university student...
... And shouts "your money or your life!"
The student keeps walking, and says "Sorry mate, I'm a Computer Science student. I don't have either".

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Science jokes School Jokes

Yo mama's so fат that when she sees a school bus she yells, "Stop that Тwinкiе!"

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Yo Momma Jokes School Jokes

A science teacher tells his class, "Oxygen is a must for breathing and life. It was discovered in 1773." A blonde student responds, "Thank God I was born after 1773! Otherwise I would have died without it."

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Blonde Jokes School Jokes God Jokes Science jokes

In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

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School Jokes God Jokes

Q: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
A: It's okay. He woke up.

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School Jokes Kids Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

Mary had a little lamb
her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
between two chunks of bread.
Mary had a little lamb
it ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its bum
and turned its wool to nylon.
Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
he kissed them too cause he was gаy.
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
and grabbed her ass
Now two of his teeth are missing.
Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy.
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it’s black and crispy.

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School Jokes Funny Poems

A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?”
The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.””
The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

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Science jokes Jokes about Women Computer Jokes Fitness jokes Student jokes Stupid Jokes School Jokes

A little boy got the homework that he had to learn the four first letters of the alphabet. He went to his mother, who was knitting and had hurt herself. He asked her what the first letter of the alphabet was, and she said a swear word. He wen’t to his brother, who was playing with a superman, and asked what the second letter of the alphabet was, and he answered ‘SUPERMAN!!!’. Then he went to his little sister, and asked what the third letter of the alphabet was, and given the fact that she was playing with Barbies, she said 'in the barbie dream house! Then he went to his father who was watching a soccer game, and his team just scored, so when he asked what the fourth letter of the alphabet was, he said ‘Olé Olé Olé!!!’. The next day at school, the teacher asked the little boy what the first four letters of the alphabet were. He said the swear word. ‘WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOUNG MAN!!!’, the teacher boomed. ‘Superman’, the boy replied. ‘WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!?!?!’, the teacher continued. ‘In the Barbie Dream House’ ‘GO TO THE PRINCIPALS OFFICE!!!’ ‘OLÉ OLÉ OLÉ OLÉ!’, the boy chanted on his was down the hall.

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School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Superman jokes Superhero Jokes

What do you call a high school student?
Alone and depressed.

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Student jokes School Jokes

Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need

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School Jokes

in English class the teacher says
(Teacher): Kids you need to say the alphabet ok Sally you first.
(Sally): Okay a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z.
(Teacher): good job Sally. Then the teacher called on 4 other students who got it right. Then the teacher called on little Johnny.
(Teacher): Little Johnny say the alphabet.
(Little Johnny): bcefghijklmnopsvwxyz.
(Teacher): no Johnny that’s not right.
(Johnny): oh I forgot u r a q t.
(Teacher). No still not right and thank you.
(Johnny): oh I’ll give you the d later .
(Class): (laughing). (Teacher): GO TO THE OFFICE NOW .

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Office and Work Jokes Student jokes School Jokes