Italy Jokes, Italian Jokes

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Why are so many Italian men named Tony?
When they ship them over from the Old Country, they stamp "To N. Y." on them...

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What's the difference between a deaf person and an Italian?
One talks with their hands and makes goofy noises at random volumes, and the other can't hear.

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Why should you always knock on your fridge door before opening it?
Because there could be an Italian dressing inside.

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My girlfriend said she wanted to be treated like a princess
So I used her as bait to lure an Italian plumber into my castle

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What do you call an Italian hоокеr?
A PASTA-tute!
I am so sorry.

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I think I was Italian,
In a pasta life.

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Why couldn't the Italian explain himself to the police?
He was handcuffed.

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Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?
He pasta way, but his legacy will become a pizza history.

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How do you talk to a dead Italian?
With a luigi board

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What do you call an Italian Jedi?
Obi Wan Cannoli.
Don't worry, I'll see myself out.

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What's a specimen?
An Italian astronaut :
- D

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The Italian government has decided to put a big clock similar to Big Ben in the leaning tower of Piza.
Now they’ll have the time as well as the inclination.

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What did the Jedi order at the Italian restaurant?
Only one cannoli.

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What does an Italian have when he is missing one arm?
A severe speech impediment.

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I'm dating an Italian bricklayer.
It's cement to be.

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Did you hear about the woman who died in an Italian restaurant?
She pasta way.

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Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta way. Although we cannoli do so much, he will forever be a pizza history. His wife? Cheese still not over it. Just goes to show here today, gone tomato. Lets send olive our prayers to the family.

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I was at an Italian restaurant last Friday...
Me:
"I'll just have the Paggione".
Waitress:
"That says 'page one', sir."

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