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Blonde Jokes

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Why are blondes like cornflakes ?
Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.
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Blonde Jokes
Q. Why do blondes have legs?
A1. So they don't get stuck to the ground.
A2. To get between the bedroom and the kitchen.
A3. So they don't leave trails, like little snails.
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Blonde Jokes
Three blondes enter a bar.
They are happy, dancing and singing.
The barman asks them:
What are you girls celebrating?
We just finished a puzzle that took us tree months to finish.
So? The barman asks.
On the box wrought 2-4 years!
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Blonde Jokes
Блондинка и брюнетка ще скачат от Айфеловата кула. Blonde & Brunette on a Cliff Vom Hochhaus fallen A blonde and a brunette fell off a building, which hit the ground first? The brunette, the blonde had to ask for directions Om en blondin och en brunett hoppade samtidigt från en skyskrapa, vem skulle träffa marken först? Brunetten, blondinen måste stanna och fråga efter vägen Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first? Friend: I don't know, who? Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions. Det var en blondine og en brunette som falt ned fra en skyskraper, hvem traff bakken først? Svar: Brunetten, fordi blondinen måtte stoppe fire ganger og spørre etter vegen Blondi ja terroristi hyppäsivät yhtä aikaa katolta. Kumpi osui ensimmäisenä maahan? Terroristi, sillä blondi eksyi matkalla. Brunette ja blondi hyppäsivät tornista alas. Kumpi oli ensin alhaalla? – Brunette, koska blondin täytyi pysähtyä kysymään tietä. Una bionda e una bruna si buttano dal 25° piano di un palazzo. Quale delle due arrivera’ per prima al suolo? La bruna! Perche’ la bionda si perde per strada! En brunette og en blondine hopper ut fra et fly. Hvem lander først, og hvorfor? Svar: Brunetta lander først, fordi blondina stopper 5 ganger for å spørre om veien. - Perche’ la bionda ha smesso di prendere la pillola ? Perche’ continuava a cadere di fuori. - Perche’ alla bionda faceva male l’ombelico? Perche’ anche il suo ragazzo era biondo. - Se una bionda... En blondine og en brunette springer samtidig ud fra et højhus. Hvem rammer først jorden? - Brunetten. Blondinen bliver nød til at spørge om vej! O blonda si o bruneta cad de pe Intercontinental. Care ajunge prima jos? Raspuns:bruneta,blonda s-a oprit sa intrebe care-i drumul. Blondi ja brunetti hyppäsivät katolta. Kumpi osui ensimmäisenä maahan? - Brunetti, sillä blondin piti matkalla pysähtyä kysymään tietä Blondi ja kukkaruukku putoavat kerrostalon katolta. Kumpi on maassa ensin? - Kukkaruukku. Blondi pysähtyy kysymään tietä. O blonda si o bruneta sunt aruncate din avion. Cine ajunge prima jos?Bruneta, pentru ca blonda se intoarce sa intrebe Cum ajunge jos. Blondýna a bruneta skočí z mrakodrapu. Obě zároveň a bez padáku. Kdo dopadne dřív? Bruneta, protože blondýna se ještě musí ptát na cestu! Jeśli blondynka i brunetka wypadną razem z okna wieżowca, która szybciej spadnie? - Brunetka. Blondynka parę razy zatrzyma się by spytać o drogę... Een domblondje en een negertje springen van een gebouw. Wie is het eerst beneden ? Het negertje want het domblondje vroeg onderweg de weg. P: Uma loira e uma morena tentam suicídio, se jogando de cima de um prédio de 20 andares... Quem cai primeiro no chão? R: A morena. Por que a loira parou para pedir informação! A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off. They all jump at the same time. Which one landed last? The blonde because she asked for directions. Ερώτηση: Εάν μια μελαχρινή και μια ξανθιά πέσουν από ένα κτήριο ποια θα φτάσει πρώτη κάτω? Απάντηση: Η μελαχρινή – η ξανθιά θα σταματήσει στο δρόμο για οδηγίες
Boy1: A blonde and brunette are on the top of a building. Who falls off first?
Boy2: The blonde?
Boy1: No, she has to ask for directions on how.
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Blonde Jokes
How do blondes pierce their ears?
They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
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Blonde Jokes
A blond whines at her mother:
Mother, I’m impregnate!
What?
Where the hеll was you’re head?
What do you mean by that, on the pillow off course!
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Blonde Jokes
One day a blonde woman entered an autobody shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car.
The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need him to fixed all the dents.
He said she could fix them herself by blowing into the tailpipe as hard as she could and they’d all pop out.
The woman went home and proceeded to get down on her hands and knees in the driveway.
She was blowing into the pipe as hard as she could and her face was turning purple when another blonde woman walked by and asked what she was doing.
After hearing the whole story the second blonde pauses for a moment then responds, “Hello! The windows are down. Your personal check for the full $30,000.”
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Jokes about Women Car and driving jokes Money jokes Blonde Jokes
A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit.
She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?"
A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?"
The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"
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Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes Men jokes Sick and Death Jokes Stupid Jokes
What does a blonde in a supermarket bending over?
Looking for low prices!
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Money jokes Blonde Jokes
Q. Why did the dum blond keep failing her driver's test?
A. Because every time the door opened, she jumped into the back seat.
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Car and driving jokes Blonde Jokes
Did you hear about the blonde who sold her car to get some money for petrol?
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Money jokes Blonde Jokes
Two bums are sitting talking.
The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever!
This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground.
So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fuскing one of them... had the best day ever."
The second вuм just laughs,
"That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks.
You know what I did?
I fuскеd her all day long."
The other вuм interrupts, "Bull!
You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life."
The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good вlоwjов?"
The other replies no.
"How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a вlоw job?"
To which the other replies,
"How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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Dark Humor Jokes Blonde Jokes Sex Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
How come you don’t find sтuрid brunettes anywhere?
Because they all painted themselves blond.
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Blonde Jokes
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once a nd reported the сriме. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
What did the blonde say when she saw a herd of elephants with sunglasses on?
Nothing, she didn't recognize them.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
The stunning blonde had gone to her student advisor for some course problems, but seemed to be paying only half attention to his replies.
"Are you feeling OK?" he asked.
"Well, to be honest, I have this compulsion to have sеx with every man I meet," she admitted. "Is there a name for my condition?"
"Why yes, there is," he said, as he picked her up and began carrying her to the couch. "It's called 'Good News'."
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Blonde Jokes
Dear Pun Gents, we are a group of four people climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro in two weeks. Can you come up with a clever name for our team? Extra credit: After we climb the mountain we are doing a four-day safari. Not sure if you can combine the two parts of the trip into a clever pun/team name. PS we are four blondes: Three boys and a girl. A Brit, a wanna-be Brit, and two all-American boys. Thanks! ~Dave, Laguna Beach, CA
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Blonde Jokes
Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice?Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?Did you hear about the blonde who was an M. D.--Mentally Deficient?Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?Did you hear about the blonde who went to a n*dist camp for a game of sтriр poker?Did you hear about the blonde who brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?
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Blonde Jokes
How can you tell when a FAX had been sent from a blonde?There is a stamp on it.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
There was a blonde a redhead and a brunette running from a cop.
They hide in potato sacks.
The officer kicks each bag.... When he kicks the redheads bag she goes meow.... When he kick the brunettes bag she goes ruff... When he kicks the blondes bag she goes potatoes!
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Office and Work Jokes Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes Police Officer Jokes
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