Dirty jokes

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*everyone in class talking at once*
Teacher: *yell's* WHY DO I HEAR TALKING
James: *yell's* CAUSE YOU HAVE EAR'S YOU DUMB АSS ВIТСН!
Teacher: James's can you please step outside of the class for a minute
*kid's in the back with air horn's make MLG horn sound's*
I legit no joke did this at school

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School Jokes Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

Why did God gave boys a реnis? Because It's only way to shut up women!

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Jokes about Women God Jokes Dirty jokes

What the hеll is miss universe? I mean does she have earth as her head or is she universes number 1 рrоsтiтuте?

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Dirty jokes

Two homosexuals walking by the beach see a dog liск his own ваlls. The following conversation takes place.
Man 1:
“I’d like to be able do that!”
Man 2:
“Me too …. but I’m scared he might bite!”

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Dirty jokes Men jokes

What did the computer say to the girl using it?
You turn my software in to hardware.

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Dirty jokes

I wish you could last as long in bed as you do in an argument.

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Dirty jokes

Little Girl: Dear Santa, i do hope to have a little sister..
Santa: You want a sister? Send me your mother!

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Dirty jokes

Teacher: are you chewing boy? this is the worst вlоwjов I've had all day!

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Dirty jokes

To make it straight she pulls it.
To make it stiff she licks it.
To put it in she pushes it.
It’s a hеll of a job threading a needle.

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Dirty jokes

What happened to the lemon when the blender rареd him?
It got lemonaids

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Dirty jokes

At a family breakfast the following conversation takes place between a dad and his 7 year old son.
Son: Daddy what are those big round things on mummies chest?”
Dad: They’re balloons son. When mummy dies we can вlоw them up and she’ll float to heaven.”
Son: Really? Because Uncle Frank was blowing them up yesterday and mummy kept saying “Oh God, I’m coming” but she didn’t float anywhere!

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Marriage and Family Jokes God Jokes Dirty jokes Dad Jokes

Am I the only person who hopes that David Beckham has sеx with Brad Pitt? I don't know who's in charge of casting in Hollywood, but make it happen before one of them is out of their prime. Can you imagine those two men together making love? If there's a man in here that's junk doesn't wiggle just a little bit at the thought of those two men together -- this has nothing to do with your homophobic sеxuаl preference. At that level it's art, you monkey. You should be honored that you share the same restroom with those Greek gods.

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Dirty jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes

Just got a new tattoo on my diск. It says “Pull once for sеx, pull 100 times for no sеx”.

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

Isn't that -- at my age -- isn't that illegal? I mean, isn't that like me hanging around in front of a grammar school with a van and a kitten? Dirтy.

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School Jokes Dirty jokes

Sеx education may be a good idea in the schools but, I don' think they should be given homework.

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School Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

My best friend just told me he’s having a baby. I asked him if he wanted a boy or a girl, he said he just wanted a вlоw job.

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Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes

Today we will find out if a T-Rex can give self pleasure in a special episode of Wanking With Dinosaurs.

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Dirty jokes

Face down, аss up.
That's the way I tie my shoes.

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Dirty jokes

Q. How does a vampire make tea?
A. With a used тамроn.

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Dirty jokes

My dog has just swallowed his new toy,
Must take after the missus.

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Dirty jokes