Men vs Women Jokes

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A police officer saw a car speeding down the highway, and he started chasing after the speeder. When he got close, he saw that it was a woman who was knitting while driving.
The cop yelled, "Pull over!"
She shouted back, "No, it's a sweater!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Q: What's the speed limit of sеx?
A: Sixty-eight - at 69, you have to turn around.

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Men vs Women Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

Q: How does a blonde order a root вееr?
A: Extra large, hold the roots.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Beer Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room?
A: So she could use it as a mirror.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

A blonde was walking down the street with shower caps on her вrеаsтs.
A guy asked her, "Hey, what's with the shower caps?"
"Shower caps?" she replied. "These are воовy condoms!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

"Dad," asked son, "What's that shriveled up old thing on Grandma?"
Dad replied ''That's Grandpa!"

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Men vs Women Jokes

What do spaghetti and women have in common?
They both squirm when you eat them.

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Men vs Women Jokes Jokes about Women Food Jokes Blonde Jokes Dirty jokes

Q: What do men and parking spaces have in common?
A: The good ones are always taken and the free ones are either very small or handicaped.

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Men vs Women Jokes

There was a man with a restaurant near a construction site.
The construction workers usually had their lunches in there, their favorite meal being beef soup. But one day the chef ran out of meat and in his panicked state he ran out the door in the hope of finding a ride to town. After noticing that there was no vehicles nearby he sadly started walking back to his restaurant. Upon nearing the construction site he saw a sheep tied up on a pole nearby. He was so happy that he untied the sheep and proceeded to his place. At lunchtime the construction workers walked in and ordered their favorite soup. During the meal, the guys started exclaiming in delight that the soup tasted extremely good today and asked what was the reason for that. The chef was pleased and proceeded to tell them about his predicament. Everyone stopped eating with a dazed look on their faces. The chef asked,
"What's the matter boys, did I sсrеw up the cooking?"
"No." replied the foreman of the construction team, "you cooked up the sсrеwing."

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Men vs Women Jokes Restaurant Jokes

A boy was playing with himself in the bathtub when his father walked in and said, "Son, if you don't stop doing that, you'll go blind."
The boy replied,"Dad, I'm over here."

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Men vs Women Jokes

Q: How do you know when a man's going to say something intelligent?
A: He starts his sentence with "My wife told me... ."

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Men vs Women Jokes Jokes about Women Men jokes Sexist Jokes

A man is sitting next to a woman on an airplane. Suddenly, the man sneezes. He unzips his pants and wipes himself off with his handkerchief. He zips up and continues reading his magazine.
The woman cannot believe what she has just seen. He sneezes again, unzips and wipes himself off with the handkerchief.
The woman says, "Sir, that's disgusting and rude! If you do it again, I'm going to call the flight attendant and have you removed from this plane."
He says, "I'm so sorry that I've offended you. I have this very rare, embarrassing condition that causes me to оrgаsм every time I sneeze."
The woman, disarmed by the man's honesty, says with sympathy, "Oh, you poor man. What do you take for it?"
"Pepper," he answers.

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Men vs Women Jokes Aviation Jokes Boss Jokes

Q: Who made the first soft drink?
A: Adam - he made Eve's cherry pop.

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Men vs Women Jokes Religion jokes

Three bored girls are sitting around, and one of them suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.
The first girl says, "I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause seven days a week, he's up."
The second girl answers, "I want mine to be Mountain Dew 'cause when he's in between my mountains, we'll be doing it."
The third girl replies, "Mine's gonna be Jack Daniel's."
Her friends argue, "You can't do that. Here we are talking about soda pop, and you're talking about a hard liquor."
The third girl says, "Exactly."

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Men vs Women Jokes

Q: What's a blonde's definition of socialism?
A: Partying!

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

Q: How is a man like a snowstorm?
A: You don't know when it's going to come, how many inches you'll get or how long it'll last.

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Men vs Women Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes

Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman pull his pants down?
A: He heard the snowblower coming.

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Men vs Women Jokes Dirty jokes Weather jokes

Why does it take longer to make a blonde snowman?
Because you have to hollow out the head first.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

"Doctor, everytime I sneeze I have an оrgаsм!"
"Are you doing anything for it?"
"Snorting pepper."

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Men vs Women Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes

Q: What kind of birth control do snakes use?
A: Anacondoms.

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Men vs Women Jokes