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Men vs Women Jokes

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island. The redhead looks to the east and says that the shore is about 20 miles away. She swims out 10 miles, but she gets tired and drowns.
The brunette also looks to the east, figures the distance to shore is about 20 miles and starts swimming. She gets 15 miles out, but she gets tired and drowns.
The blonde figures that there's about 20 miles to the shore also. She swims 19 miles to the point where she can barely see the shore, and then she gets tired. So she swims back.
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8 km schwimmen 99 μίλια A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a deserted island together. Eine Rothaarige, eine Braunhaarige und eine Blondine sind auf einem Boot unterwegs. Kurze Zeit später sinkt das Boot und alle drei schreien nach Hilfe. Da kommt der Rothaarigen eine Idee: "Ich schwimm zurück und hol Hilfe!" Sie springt ins Wasser, kommt zwei Meter weit, dreht dann aber um und... A redhead, a blonde and a brunette were stuck on an island and had to get back home from the island. The redhead swims half way and drowns. The brunette swims half way and drowns too. The blonde swims halfway gets tired and swims back. Une brune, une rousse et une blonde sont sur une île deserte. Elles se trouvent sur une ile déserte à 30 km du rivage La brune annonce : "Je vais tacher d' atteindre le continent à la nage". Elle se lance. Elle nage 10 km commence à se fatiguer et puis 15 et là épuisée elle se noie. La rousse... A blonde, brunette and a red-head were trapped on a island 20 miles from shore. The red-head started swimming and got tired after 2 miles and turned around and swam back. Then the brunette started to swim and after 7 miles of swimming she turned... Bellman, en rysk och en tysk skulle simma från Somalia till Australien. Rysken orkade 2 mil men sedan drunknade han. Tysken orkade 5 mil men även han drunknade. Nu var det Bellmans tur. Han simmade... Eine Blondine, eine Brünette und eine Rothaarige stranden auf einer einsamen Insel. Die Rothaarige klettert auf eine Palme und sagt: "Seht mal! Etwa 5 km von hier ist eine Insel mit Menschen drauf.... Machen eine Schwarzhaarige, eine Blondine und eine Braunhaarige ein Wettschwimmen zu einer 8 Kilometer entfernten Insel. Die Schwarzhaarige schafft es. Die Braunhaarige ertrinkt nach 2 Kilometern.... Det var 3 tjejer. 1 rödhårig, 1 brunett och 1 blondin. Dom skulle simma från en ö till en annan ö. det var 50 km mellan dom. Den rödhåriga simmade 10 km och sen drunknade hon. Den brunhåriga...
Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
Q: Why do blondes have more fun?
A: They're easier to keep amused.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes
Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A: A whine cellar.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce?
A: He thought his wife was a flake.
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Men vs Women Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes
Bertha was worried about her husband George, so one day she took him to the doctor's. As the doctor called George in and looked him over, George began insisting, "There's nothing wrong with me. I know because God takes care of me."
"What do you mean?" asked the doctor.
"Well," George responded, "when I go to the bathroom he turns the light on and off."
The doctor decided he had better talk to both George and his wife, so he calls Bertha into the room and begins to explain, "George says God turns the light on and off for him when he goes to the bathroom. Is it true that -"
"DАММIТ, George!" Bertha bursts out, "How many times do I have to tell you not to рiss in the fridge?"
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Men vs Women Jokes
Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
A: A Frosted Flake.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap?
She chewed off three legs and was still stuck.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Three nuns went to a football game and three men got stuck sitting behind them. The men couldn't see very well because of the nun's little nun hats. So they came up with a plan to make them leave.
''I think I'll move to California, there's only 50 Catholics there," said the first man.
"I think I'll move to Washington, there's only 25 Catholics there.''
"I think I'll move to Idaho, there's only 10 Catholics there.'' Then one of the nuns turned around.
"Go to Неll, there are NO Catholics there."
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Men vs Women Jokes
Q: What do you get when you cross a fortune teller with a рrоsтiтuте?
A: A whoroscope.
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Men vs Women Jokes
A doctor tells a group of patients, "The material we put into our stomachs is terrible.
Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High-fат diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" An old man raises his hand and says, "Wedding cake."
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Која е најштетната храна? Учени откриха първата храна, която причинява мъка и страдание години след приемането си: A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. Föredragshållaren talar om gifter och annat olämpligt i födan. Han frågar åhörarna: - Känner någon av er till något som vi äter som kan förorsaka oss åratal av lidande? En röst i mängden: -... En doktor hold et foredrag om næring hos det lokale biblioteket. Han sa «Hva vi putter i oss er nok til å drepe de fleste av oss som sitter her.» «For eksempel, rødt kjøtt er forferdelig, sukker... Durante um congresso sobre saúde alimentar, o orador faz uma pergunta: — Qual o alimento que causa sofrimento extremo, durante anos, depois de ser comido? Depois de um longo silêncio, do meio da... Доктор држи предавање пред голема публика во Оксфорд: Материјалот што го ставаме во нашите стомаци требаше да не убие - барем повеќето од нас кои тука седиме - уште пред многу години. Црвеното месо...
Men vs Women Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Diet and Weight Loss Jokes
The following sign was posted at a fast-food restaurant owned by two blondes:
Parking for drive-through customers only!
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Men vs Women Jokes Food Jokes Blonde Jokes Restaurant Jokes
An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip.
Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop, and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her. She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!" "You can't get out of yourroom?"; the captain asked. "Why not?" She replied, "There are only threedoors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one hasa sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Hotel Jokes Aviation Jokes Military Jokes Pilot Jokes
Q: What do you call a fly in a blonde's brain?
A: A space invader.
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Die Fliege im Kopf Comment appelle-t-on un microbe qui se loge dans le crâne d'une blonde? Un envahisseur de l'espace Hvad kalder du en flue der flyver ind i en blondines øre? - En space-invader
Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q: Why did the соndом fly across the room?
A: It was рissеd off.
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Men vs Women Jokes Gross Jokes
Q: Why are so many blondes rushing out to get вrеаsт implants?
A: They don't want to pay the flat tax.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
A blonde's house was on fire, so she called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please! My house is burning! Hurry!"
The operator said, "OK, calm down, and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"
The blonde replied, "Duh, in that big red truck!"
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Някакъв се обажда в пожарната: Пожар Блондинка предизвиква пожар в къщата си и звъни на пожарната. От там и отговарят: "Ist da die Feuerwehr? Hier brennt es !" - "Keine Panik, wie kommen wir denn zu Ihnen?" - "Haben Sie denn nicht mehr diese roten, schnellen Autos?" Мужик звонит пожарным и орет: - Помогите! Мой дом горит! Быстрее сюда! Диспетчер: - Как к вам доехать?" Мужик: - Вы, что совсем того?! На большой красной машине! A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone. "Please state the nature of your emergency," says the... Ein Anruf bei der Feuerwehr: “Hilfe bei mir brennt es!” Der Leitstellendisponent: “Ja, wie kommen wir denn zu Ihnen?” Anrufer: “Haben Sie nicht mehr die großen roten Autos?” - Halló, tűzoltóság? Kérem, jöjjenek gyorsan, ég a házam! - És hogy jutunk el Önhöz? - Miért? Már nincs meg az a szép piros autójuk? O blonda Suna la pompieri ca sa raporteze un incendiu in cartier. Operatorul il intreaba: - Cum ajungem acolo? - Pai nu mai aveti masinile alea mari si Rosii? Die Blondine ruft aufgeregt in den Telefonhörer: "Es brennt, es brennt! Machen Sie bitte schnell!" Der Feuerwehrmann am anderen Ende: "Wie kommen wir denn zu Ihnen?" Blondine: "Ja, haben Sie denn... Eine ältere Dame ruft die Feuerwehr an: "Es brennt! Es brennt! So kommen Sie doch! Es brennt! Es brennt!" Fragt der Feuerwehrmann: "Wie kommen wir denn zu Ihnen?" Fragt die Dame: "Ja - haben Sie...
Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q: Why are there no fertility clinics in Arkansas?
A: Sooner or later, they find a potent cousin.
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Men vs Women Jokes
Q: Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A: To see what was on the other side.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes
Q: Why do elephants have four feet?
A: In the animal kingdom, six inches just doesn't cut it.
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Men vs Women Jokes
A blond man and a brunette woman were happily married and about to have a baby.
One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital, and she gave birth to two baby boys. The blond man turned to his wife and yelled, "All right, who's the other father?"
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Men vs Women Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes
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