Men-Women jokes

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island. The redhead looks to the east and says that the shore is about 20 miles away. She swims out 10 miles, but she gets tired and drowns.
The brunette also looks to the east, figures the distance to shore is about 20 miles and starts swimming. She gets 15 miles out, but she gets tired and drowns.
The blonde figures that there's about 20 miles to the shore also. She swims 19 miles to the point where she can barely see the shore, and then she gets tired. So she swims back.

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Q: Why do blondes have more fun?
A: They're easier to keep amused.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes

Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A: A whine cellar.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce?
A: He thought his wife was a flake.

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Men vs Women Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

Bertha was worried about her husband George, so one day she took him to the doctor's. As the doctor called George in and looked him over, George began insisting, "There's nothing wrong with me. I know because God takes care of me."
"What do you mean?" asked the doctor.
"Well," George responded, "when I go to the bathroom he turns the light on and off."
The doctor decided he had better talk to both George and his wife, so he calls Bertha into the room and begins to explain, "George says God turns the light on and off for him when he goes to the bathroom. Is it true that -"
"DАММIТ, George!" Bertha bursts out, "How many times do I have to tell you not to рiss in the fridge?"

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Men vs Women Jokes

Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
A: A Frosted Flake.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap?
She chewed off three legs and was still stuck.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Three nuns went to a football game and three men got stuck sitting behind them. The men couldn't see very well because of the nun's little nun hats. So they came up with a plan to make them leave.
''I think I'll move to California, there's only 50 Catholics there," said the first man.
"I think I'll move to Washington, there's only 25 Catholics there.''
"I think I'll move to Idaho, there's only 10 Catholics there.'' Then one of the nuns turned around.
"Go to Неll, there are NO Catholics there."

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Men vs Women Jokes

Q: What do you get when you cross a fortune teller with a рrоsтiтuте?
A: A whoroscope.

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Men vs Women Jokes

A doctor tells a group of patients, "The material we put into our stomachs is terrible.
Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High-fат diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" An old man raises his hand and says, "Wedding cake."

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Men vs Women Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Diet and Weight Loss Jokes

The following sign was posted at a fast-food restaurant owned by two blondes:
Parking for drive-through customers only!

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Men vs Women Jokes Food Jokes Blonde Jokes Restaurant Jokes

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip.
Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop, and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her. She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!" "You can't get out of yourroom?"; the captain asked. "Why not?" She replied, "There are only threedoors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one hasa sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Hotel Jokes Aviation Jokes Military Jokes Pilot Jokes

Q: What do you call a fly in a blonde's brain?
A: A space invader.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Q: Why did the соndом fly across the room?
A: It was рissеd off.

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Men vs Women Jokes Gross Jokes

Q: Why are so many blondes rushing out to get вrеаsт implants?
A: They don't want to pay the flat tax.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

A blonde's house was on fire, so she called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please! My house is burning! Hurry!"
The operator said, "OK, calm down, and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"
The blonde replied, "Duh, in that big red truck!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Q: Why are there no fertility clinics in Arkansas?
A: Sooner or later, they find a potent cousin.

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Men vs Women Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A: To see what was on the other side.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

Q: Why do elephants have four feet?
A: In the animal kingdom, six inches just doesn't cut it.

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Men vs Women Jokes

A blond man and a brunette woman were happily married and about to have a baby.
One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital, and she gave birth to two baby boys. The blond man turned to his wife and yelled, "All right, who's the other father?"

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Men vs Women Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes