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Old Granny Parkinson had won over half a million dollars in the lottery, but as she was a frail little woman her family was concerned that the shock of hearing the news might prove too much for her. Accordingly, they called in the family doctor to ask his advice.
“I’ll tell her if you like,” said the doctor. “I’ll lead up to it gradually.” The family accepted his offer gratefully, and showed him into the old lady’s bedroom. The doctor pretended to give her a routine examination and then began to chat generally of this and that, carefully leading the conversation ‘round to money. “Tell me Mrs. Parkinson,” he said, “what would you do if you suddenly came into half a million dollars?”
“Half a million?” said the old lady reflectively, “well you’ve always been very good to me, doctor, so I think I’d give half of it to you.”
And the doctor immediately collapsed and died of shock.
Roger was heartbroken when his favorite dog, Sam, went belly up. He rushed him to the vet, saying, “Do whatever you can for Sam, never mind the cost!”
“Sorry, Roger, but this dog is dead.” replied the vet, after a glance at the animal.
“Sam just can’t be dead.” insisted Roger. “Do something!”
The vet called for Tabby, his big yellow tomcat. Tabby poked Sam in the tail, then in the belly, and finally hissed in his ear. Nada. Roger was forced to accept the sad news.
On the way out, Roger was shocked to receive a bill for $625. “What is this for?” he exclaimed.
“Well that is $25 for the visit…” said the vet “…. And $600 for the catscan.”