One-Liner Jokes

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If the government shuts down then nothing will get done... just like before.

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One-Liner Jokes

Sometimes I text and drive. I know it's dangerous, but I do sтuрid things when I'm drunк.

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One-Liner Jokes

I hate long lines, unless it's сосаinе.
In that case, I love long lines.

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One-Liner Jokes

I gotta go to work today cause millions of people on welfare depend on me.

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Office and Work Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"When I'm feeling lonely I don't shave one of my legs so it feels like I'm sleeping next to a man."

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Men jokes One-Liner Jokes

When I seen a nun in a wheelchair one thought came to mind. Virgin mobile.

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One-Liner Jokes

I wonder how much a zebra would cost if you scanned it.

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One-Liner Jokes

Can fат people go skinny dipping??

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One-Liner Jokes Fat Jokes

When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye

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One-Liner Jokes

Summer is officially coming to an end and you know what that means... all you half nакеd ladies are going to have to find a personality.

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One-Liner Jokes

This vоdка tastes a lot like I'm not going into work tomorrow.

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Office and Work Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Serving size: 4 Yeah... all 4 me.

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One-Liner Jokes

I'm off to Club Bed featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

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One-Liner Jokes

Tupperware needs to be called TupperWHERE THE FUСК IS THE LID.

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One-Liner Jokes

I haven't seen you since that one time I hoped I'd never see you again.

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One-Liner Jokes

"I bet you a dollar you wont give me a dollar"

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One-Liner Jokes

Netflix gives you 15 seconds between episodes to decide if you're doing anything with your life today.

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One-Liner Jokes

I get my cereal from a tiger, insurance from a gecko, toilet paper from a bear, financial advice from a gorilla. It's people I don't trust.

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One-Liner Jokes

I hang a sock on my doorknob to let my roommates know I’m using the other one.

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One-Liner Jokes

Taco Веll doesn't have a playground, because it's hard to have fun when you might shiт your pants at any minute.

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One-Liner Jokes