Vagina Jokes

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A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flyin around about six inches above the water. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal.”
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal.”
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal.”
Then it all happened
The fly dropped six inches
The fish came up and caught the fly
The bear came out and caught the fish
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich
The mouse went for the sandwich
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a рussy gets wet.
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Vagina Jokes
Вампирки Τι λέει μια λεσβία βρυκόλακας σε μια λεσβία βρυκόλακα ;;; Deux lesbiennes vampires discutent : Любимата фраза на вампирите-лезбийки: Хайде чао, ще се видим след 28 дни Quelle est la phrase préférée des vampires lesbiennes ? - Bon, à dans 28 jours ! Que se disent deux vampires lesbiennes lorsqu'elles se quittent? A dans 28 jours !!! What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month. Wie verabschieden sich 2 weibliche Vampire? - "Bis nächsten Monat." Den ene lesbiske vampyren til den andre: - Ser deg neste måned. Cosa dice una vampira lesbica alla propria amante? Ci vediamo il prossimo mese! Due vampire lesbiche si salutano: "Allora, ciao! Ci vediamo il mese prossimo!" Ci sono 2 vampiresse lesbiche distese sul letto intente a fare un 69. Ad un certo punto si alzano, si rivestono e una dice all'altra - Ciao, ci rivediamo fra 28 giorni! What do lesbian vampires say after sex? “See you next month.” What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after the lesbian vampire was done licking the pussy of the heterosexual woman? when is your next blood period?
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A man needs to leave for lengthy a business trip, but his wife is saddened by this. She explains to him that if he isn’t home every night, there will be no way to satisfy herself if she feels hоrny. The man claims that she doesn’t need sеx, because a dildо should work just fine. He quickly runs to the local gift shop and asks the cashier if the store carries anything really special. The cashier quietly pulls out an old box, and removes a wooden реnis from inside. The cashier states that the dildо has been passed down in his family for generations, and was crafted by a witch deep within the Amazon jungle. The cashier sits up in his chair and shouts “Voodoo Diск, the door!”
The wooden реnis flies across the room, and begins to rapidly тhrusт itself in and out of the front door keyhole. “Voodoo Diск, the lamp!” The wooden реnis flies up inside of the lamp on the cahsier’s desk, and once again, begins to тhrusт in and out. “Voodoo Diск, return to your box!” The wooden реnis flies back into the box and the cashier closes the lid.
The man chooses to buy the wooden реnis, and just as he is about to leave, the cashier tells him a very important bit of information regarding the Voodoo Diск: “The cursed dildо can only be controlled through verbal commands, it is far too powerful to be moved by hand.” says the cashier. “You must never forget that!”
The man nods and heads home.
Later that day, the man explains to his wife how the sеx toy works, and then leaves for his trip.
A few days later, the wife becomes very hоrny, and opens up the box. She proceeds to shout “Voodoo Diск, my рussy!” The dildо zooms into her vаginа, and pleasures her for roughly 6-8 hours. She soon begins to grow tired, and attempts to pull the dildо out of her. She pulls as hard as she can, but just can’t get it it. The wife panicks, and begins driving to the hospital with the wooden реnis still inside of her vаginа. A police officer pulls her over for speeding, and asks to see some identification. The wife exclaims “Help, help, there is a Voodoo Diск inside of my vаginа and it won’t come out!”
The officer raises an eyebrow in disbelief.
“Voodoo Diск my аss, вiтсh.”
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Какво е общото между кунилингуса и мафията. Малко да ти се изплъзне езика и си дълбоко в лайната ... Hvad er ligheden mellem en Mafia og en tissekone? – Hvis du ikke kan styre din tunge er du i dybt lort Каква е приликата между мафия и беснееща съпруга? Ако не можете да си контролирате езика, сте мъртъв Care este asemanarea dintre Mafie shi cunilignus?... - Un pas greshit... Si ai dat de rahat!!! At slikke fisse At slikke fisse er det samme som at lege med mafian. En forkert bevægelse så er du ude i noget lort.... Sievietes klitors ir kā mafija: Viena nepareiza kustība un Tu esi dirsā
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