Sex Jokes

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Sex Jokes

Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
A. Locking the car door.

Question master: ‘In the Garden of Eden, what were the first words Eve said to Adam?’
Contestant: ‘Gosh, that’s a hard one!’
Question master: ‘Well done. Two points.’

I know sex, how to sex, kеер а sex, dumb ass sex, like уои sex, busy for sex, 15 seconds sex.
Read again without sex!

‘I believe that sex between two people is a beautiful experience.
Between five it’s fantastic!’
Woody Allen

She’s got her very own method of birth control.
She takes her make-up off.

‘Sex for an old guy is a bit like shooting pool with a rope.’
George Burns

My girlfriend likes to pretend to be a 14 year old when we have sex.
I don't get it she will be 14 in a few years anyway.

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

Murphy the bus driver is sitting in his cab when his supervisor comes along.
‘Hello, Murphy,’ he says.
‘What time did you pull out this morning?’
‘I didn’t,’ replies Murphy.
‘And I’ve been worrying about it all day.’

A young couple get between the sheets for the first time.
In a flash it’s over.
The boy says, ‘If I’d known you were a virgin I’d have taken more time.’
His girlfriend replies, ‘If I’d known you were going to take more time I’d have taken off my tights.’

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