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Computer Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
If you love someone, set him free.

If he comes back, I think we can charge him for re-installation fees, but tell him that he's getting an upgrade.
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Computer Jokes
What's the first symptom a computer is getting old?

Memory problems.
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Computer Jokes
The oldest computer can be traced to Adam and Eve.
Yes, it was an Apple.
But with an extremely limited memory.
Just one byte.
Then everything crashed.
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Religion jokes Computer Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes
Bully; NO comebsck ?
Nerd: i would have a comeback but all my сuмs in the back of your moms mouth.
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Computer Jokes Insult Jokes
A really dumb woman tries to use her computer, but it wouldn't work. So she calls a computer repairman to come out and fix it. The computer repairman comes and looks at the computer. He notices that it wasn't plugged in, so he plugs it in. He starts up the computer and the woman was so overjoyed that she asks him what was wrong with the computer. He replied that it was an "I D 10 T error"
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Computer Jokes Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes
A guy asked his very good friend if you could stop over to his place and spend a little time working on his computer.

His friend agreed and turned the system on. When he turned on the PC he had an unpleasant surprise.

He asked: ”Why is the display completely black?”

His friend answered: ”The PC is mourning his video card...”
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Computer Jokes Office and Work Jokes Friendship Jokes
fake nails? fake hair?
fake personality?
are u sure u wernt made in china?
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Computer Jokes Insult Jokes
In a software design meeting, we were using typical technical jargon to discuss a data exchange interface with a vendor.

One co-worker said the programming we had ordered was delayed because the vendor was suffering from a "severe non-linear waterfowl issue."

Curious, the team leader raised his eyebrows and asked, "What exactly is that?"

The programmer replied, "They don't have all their ducks in a row."
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Office and Work Jokes Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”
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Computer Jokes
Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?
Because they had a connection
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Computer Jokes
What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?
Ask Boeing.
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Computer Jokes
How did the computer get out of the house?
He used windows.
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Computer Jokes
my wife said if I don’t get of the computer shes gonna slam my head in to the keyboard but I think I’ll ajlkfsdhnvkwr;anhf
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Computer Jokes
The man who created autocorrecthas died.
Restaurant in peace!
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Почина човека, измислил авто корекцията.
Dark Humor Jokes Computer Jokes Men jokes Restaurant Jokes
If Operating Systems Were Airlines
DOS Air: Passengers walk out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane,
Push it until it gets in the air, hop on, then jump off when it hits
The ground. They grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop
On, jump off...
Mac Airways: The cashiers, flight attendants, and pilots all look the
Same, talk the same, and act the same. When you ask them questions
About the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need
To know, and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines: The terminal is neat and clean, the attendants
Courteous, the pilots capable. The fleet of Lear jets the carrier
Operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushes above
The clouds and, at 20,000 feet, explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways: The terminal is almost empty - only a few prospective
Passengers mill about. The announcer says that a flight has just
Departed, although no planes appear to be on the runway. Airline
Personnel apologize profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing
From time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside. They tell each
Passenger how great the flight will be on these new jets and how much
Safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but they will have to wait a
Little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe
Until mid-2005. Maybe longer
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Computer Jokes
The owner of a small computer store was getting tired of fixing the exact same problem over and over on computers for people... One day 3 customers came in at the same time. He looked at them all and said. Everyone one of your computers gave me this error message "Error you have a syntax IDtenT error. And asked them to right it down. All of them got out their pens and wrote IDtenT error, he smiled then told them. No that's not how you write it is the number "10". So they all wrote it again... ID10T error
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Computer Jokes
1. Open a new file in your PC.
2. Name it "Housework."
3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN.
4. Empty the RECYCLE BIN.
5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Housework permanently?"
6. Answer calmly, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly....
7. Feel better?
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Computer Jokes
I don't always test my code, but when I do, it is in production....
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Computer Jokes
Computers can never replace humans. They may become capable of artificial intelligence, but they will never master real stupidity.
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Computer Jokes
They say spending too much on the internet is bad for you...
I wonder if there's a website to find out more information about it?
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Computer Jokes Internet Jokes
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