Friendship Jokes

Firend: tell me a clean joke.
Me: ok, i took a bath with bubbles.
Friend: now tell me a dirтy joke.
Me: ok, bubbles is the girl next door.

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There are 3 girls on a island. they are blond, brunette and a black haired.
After 3 weeks of starvation god comes down and says "Go home alredy. i will give you 1 wish each. use it wisley.
The brunette says "i want to go home!" and рооf she goes home.
The black says "i want to go home!" and рооf she goes home.
The the blonde says "i want my friends back!"

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God Jokes Blonde Jokes Friendship Jokes

My friend:
"You have terrible aim"
Me:
"Yea, well if you dad had better aim we wouldn't have to deal with you, now would we"

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes Dad Jokes

If I wanted a b*tch as a friend, I would've brought a dog

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Friend 1: Thank you, Captain Obvious!
Friend 2: Your welcome, Sergeant Sarcasm!
Friend 1: Indeed, Comrade Comeback!
Friend 2: Thank you, Senior Sмаrтаss!
Friend 1: Anytime, Dictator Diскhеаd!

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Went to my friends house with my girlfriend today. As we walked in I noticed her phone automatically connected to his wifi. That f*cking sluт.

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Friendship Jokes

Boy: Ваве, tell me something that makes me happy and angry at the same time.
Girl: You've got a вiggеr реnis, than all of your friends.

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Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes

A blonde and red head are walking in the woods when then red head has a heart attack and falls to the ground. Shocked, the blonde takes out her phone and calls the police and she shouts, "I think my friend is dead what do I do?". The policeman on the phone says,
"Calm down and listen to me. First make sure that he really is dead." There is a silence. Then a loud gunshot. The blonde gets back on the phone and says,
"Okay, now what?"

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Blonde Jokes Police Officer Jokes Friendship Jokes

I never let my best friend do sтuрid things … alone.

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Friendship Jokes

A guy is walking down the street and he sees his friend with a black eye. He asks him what happened.
His friends says,
"Well I was in church and..."
The man interrupts "Church! How do you get hurt in church?"
The friend continues, "Well I was sitting behind this woman Angelina, and after a while what with all the standing, sitting and kneeling, I noticed she had developed a wegie. Now me being a nice guy, I pulled it out for her. She turned around "WHACK"
"
The man says "I cant believe you did that", and continues walking.
A week later he sees his friend again and he has another black eye. He asks him what happened this time and his friend responds, "Well I was in church again..."
The man interrupts "CHURCH AGAIN? How do you keep getting hurt in church?!"
The friend explains, "Well, I was sitting behind Angelina again and..."
"Don't tell me you did it again"
"I did not, after all of the standing, sitting, and kneeling, I noticed the wegie again..."
"If you pulled it out again..."
"I did not pull it out. This time he husband was with her an he pulled it out for her. Now, I know she doesn't like that, so I pushed it back in."

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Jokes about Women Men jokes Friendship Jokes

Black friend:
"I got a new black hoodie!"
You:
"Great, now no one will see you..."

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes Friendship Jokes

Me: how does it feel to be born on the highway
Friend: what???
Me: well isn't that were accidents happen

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

Me- "What mouse walks on 2 feet?"
Friend- "I don't know"
Me- "Mickey Mouse, what duck walks on 2 feet?"
Friend- "Donald Duck?"
Me- "No, all ducks diрshiт"
Friend- "Sсrеw you"

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Friendship Jokes

A guy crying after break-up: I want her back...
His friend: What about her front???

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Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes

Friend:
- And they lived happily ever after.
Me: Cool story, bro. Wanna hear mine?
Friend: Sure!
Me: Once upon a time nobody gave a f***

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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes

A husband is having a вееr at the pub with his friends when he sends an email to his wife.
"What are you emailing her?" asked one.
He reads his message out loud, "Having a вееr with the boys. If I'm not home in twenty minutes, read this email again."

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Bar and Bartender Jokes Friendship Jokes

There once was a Russian guy named Olaf who was mean, rude, and crude. One day his wife and her friend were in the kitchen discussing Christmas. Suddenly Olaf shouted, "It's gonna rain any moment now!"
Next thing you know it starts raining. The wife's friend is shocked. She said,
"How in the world did he know that?"
Without missing a beat the wife said to her, "Rude Olaf the Red knows rain dear."

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Christmas Jokes Friendship Jokes

To make his class interesting, an English language teacher asked a grade 3 student to challenge him in an English test. The student wrote this word on the classroom board, SIDANDTED, and asked his teacher to explain its meaning.
The teacher looked at the word for some time and even searched for its meaning in the dictionary. After several minutes of his research, he gave up and asked his student to explain the meaning.
The student simply said, “They are my friends, Sid and Ted.”

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School Jokes Friendship Jokes

Me: What happened to you? You don't look so good.
Friend: I got stung by a brose.
Me: There's no b in rose.
Friend: There was in this one!

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Animal Jokes Friendship Jokes

A recently widow says to her friend, “Oh don’t talk to me about lawyers”
“I’ve had so much trouble settling my late husband’s estate that I sometimes whish he hadn’t died….”

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Old People Jokes Friendship Jokes Lawyer Jokes