One-Liner Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

A man was found guilty of overusing commas.
The judge warned him to expect a really long sentence.

89 0

Judge and Court Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"Last Sunday I found a wallet packed with money down by the church."
"Did you give it back?"
"Not yet. I'm still trying to decide if it's a temptation from the devil or the answer to a prayer."

89 0

One-Liner Jokes Money jokes Religion jokes Church jokes

Q: What's worse than a redhead and a brunette trying to build a house underwater?
A: A blonde trying to set fire to it.

88 0

Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

A man walks into his doctor’s office and says, “Doctor, I think I’m addicted to Twitter.”
The doctor looks at him and says, “Sorry, I don’t follow you."

88 0

Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"I'm suffering dreadfully from insomnia. I've tried all sorts of remedies, but I can find nothing that will send me to sleep."
"Why don't your try talking to yourself?"

88 0

One-Liner Jokes

I am so old...
When walking into a bar they checked my pulse instead of my ID!

88 1

One-Liner Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Old People Jokes

If you rearrange the letters of MAILMEN...
They get really upset.

88 0

One-Liner Jokes

NED: I have a knocker on my house door.
ED: Really. You have a knocker.
NED: Does that impress you?
ED: Yes. You deserve the No Веll prize.

88 0

One-Liner Jokes

The 4 stages of man...
He believes in Santa Claus.
He doesn't believe in Santa Claus.
He is Santa Claus.
He looks like Santa Claus.

88 0

Christmas Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"You see, doctor, I’m always dizzy for half an hour after I get up in the morning,” said Carla.
"I have the solution for you," replied the doctor.
"Really, what is it?"
“Well, try getting up half an hour later."

88 0

Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I can guarantee you won't feel any pain, in “no one's hurtin” terms.

88 0

One-Liner Jokes

If a man is bald in front, he's a thinker...
If he's bald in the back, he is a lover...
If he's bald in the front and back, he thinks he's a lover.

88 0

One-Liner Jokes

Friday vs Monday

88 0

One-Liner Jokes Monday jokes Friday jokes

From a passenger ship one can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving is hands.
"Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain.
"I have no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes mad like that."

88 0

One-Liner Jokes Military Jokes

An old guy was working out in the gym when he spotted an attractive young lady.
He asked a nearby trainer, "What machine should I use to impress that lady over there?"
The trainer looked him up and down and said, "I would try the ATM in the lobby.

87 0

Men vs Women Jokes One-Liner Jokes Fitness jokes

While visiting a water show a tourist asked one of the divers, "Why do scuba divers always fall backward off their boats?
To which the diver replied, "If they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat."

87 0

Sailor Jokes One-Liner Jokes Irish jokes

They say that an apple a day will keep the doctor away...
Why stop there?
An onion a day will keep everybody away!

87 0

One-Liner Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes

A truck loaded with Vick’s VapoRub overturned on the highway.
Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours.

87 0

One-Liner Jokes

Doctor: "Would you have the money if I said you needed an operation?"
Patient: "Would you say I needed an operation if you thought I didn't have the money?"

87 0

One-Liner Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes

Fact of Life: After Monday & Tuesday Even the Calendar says W T F

86 0

One-Liner Jokes Monday jokes