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Вицове за Наркомани
English
Drogen Witze, Drogenwitze, Dro...
Chistes de drogas
Анекдоты про наркоманов
Blagues de drogués
Barzellette sui drogati
Αστεία για Ναρκομανείς
Вицови за наркомани
Uyuşturucu Bağımlıları Fıkrala...
Анекдоти про Наркоманів
Piadas de Viciados
Dowcipy i kawały: Narkotyki
Skämt om droger och missbrukar...
Grappen over drugs en verslaaf...
Vittigheder om stoffer og nark...
Vitser om Narkomane
Huumevitsit, Narkkarit
Drogos Viccek
Glume despre Drogati
Vtipy o Narkomanech
Anekdotai apie narkomanus
Anekdotes par narkomaniem
Vicevi o Ovisnicima
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Drug Jokes
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Q. What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend?
A. Homeless.
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Yo mama so short when she smokes wееd she can't even get high
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Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and кill you.
Chuck Norris had two 8-Ваlls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
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How do you suffocate a niggеr?
Tell him there's wееd inside the pillowcase.
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This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
Yes.
And in what ways does it affect your memory?
I forget.
You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
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A boxer is whining to the doctor that he can’t sleep.
I won’t give you any drugs, you don’t need any.
Use the classical method, the one with counting the sheep’s.
I tried.
But, every time I get to 9 I jump off the bed.
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Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
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What does a wizard say when doing drugs? Injecto Patronum!
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Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lеsвiаns who are suffering from depression? Its called Trycoxagain.
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How does a рrоsтiтuте make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her сrаск and sell it again.
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What’s the difference between drugs and kids?
I don’t sell drugs.
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– Намерих спринцовка в чантата ти, Иванчо, ваксинираш ли се?? – Не, тате, друсам се – А, добре тогава
– I found a syringe in your bag, Johnny, are you getting vaccinated?? – No dad, I'm doing drugs – Oh, well then that's fine
– Я нашёл шприц в твоей сумке, Ваня, ты вакцинируешься?? – Нет, папа, я колюсь – А, ну тогда ладно
– Ich habe eine Spritze in deiner Tasche gefunden, Max, lässt du dich impfen?? – Nein Papa, ich nehme Drogen – Ach so, na dann ist ja gut
– J'ai trouvé une seringue dans ton sac, Paul, tu te vaccines ?? – Non papa je me drogue – Ah bon ben ça va alors
– Βρήκα μια σύριγγα στην τσάντα σου, Γιάννη, εμβολιάζεσαι?? – Όχι μπαμπά, παίρνω ναρκωτικά – Α, εντάξει τότε
– Но trovato una siringa nella tua borsa, Marco, ti vaccini?? – No papà, mi drogo – Ah, beh allora va bene
– Çantanda bir şırınga buldum, Ali, aşı mı oluyorsun?? – Hayır baba, uyuşturucu kullanıyorum – Ha, tamam o zaman
– Я знайшов шприц у твоїй сумці, Ваню, ти вакцинуєшся?? – Ні, тату, я колюся – А, ну тоді добре
– Encontrei uma seringa na tua bolsa, João, estás a vacinar-te?? – Não pai, drogo-me – Ah, então está bem
– Znalazłem strzykawkę w twojej torbie, Jasio, szczepisz się?? – Nie tato, biorę narkotyki – A, no to dobrze
– Jag hittade en spruta i din väska, Kalle, vaccinerar du dig?? – Nej pappa, jag tar droger – Jaha, då är det lugnt
– Ik heb een spuit in je tas gevonden, Jantje, laat je je vaccineren?? – Nee papa, ik gebruik drugs – O, nou dan is het goed
– Jeg fandt en sprøjte i din taske, Mads, bliver du vaccineret?? – Nej far, jeg tager stoffer – Nå, så er det fint
– Jeg fant en sprøyte i sekken din, Ola, vaksinerer du deg?? – Nei pappa, jeg tar dop – Å, da er det greit
– Löysin ruiskun laukustasi, Mikko, otatko rokotteen?? – En isä, käytän huumeita – Ahaa, no sitten kaikki hyvin
– Találtam egy fecskendőt a táskádban, Pisti, oltatod magad?? – Nem apa, drogozom – Ja, akkor rendben
– Am găsit o seringă în geanta ta, Ionel, te vaccinezi?? – Nu tată, mă droghez – A, bine atunci
– Našel jsem v tvé tašce injekční stříkačku, Pepíku, očkuješ se?? – Ne tati, beru drogy – Aha, tak to je v pořádku
– Radau švirkštą tavo krepšyje, Jonai, ar skiepijiesi?? – Ne tėti, vartoju narkotikus – Ai, na tada gerai
– Atradu šļirci tavā somā, Jānīti, tu vakcinējies?? – Nē tēti, es lietoju narkotikas – Ā, nu tad labi
– Našao sam špricu u tvojoj torbi, Ivane, cijepiš li se?? – Ne tata, drogiram se – Aha, onda u redu
– Найдов шприц во твојата торба, Петар, се вакцинираш?? – Не тато, се дрогирам – А, добро тогаш
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On dit que la drogue est notre pire ennemi, mais Dieu nous a pourtant dit d'aimer nos ennemis.
My mom told me drugs are my enemies… but Jesus said to love your enemies
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Q: How do you know you are a true stoner?
A: When your воng gets washed more than your dishes!
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Q: What do you call a pothead with two spliffs?
A: Double jointed.
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Q: What do you call one bowl between three tokers ?
A: Malnutrition.
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Q: What do you call a family that grows Marijuana in their backyard?
A: A Joint Family.
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Q: What does marijuana and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
A: They both get smoked in bowls.
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