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Latest Jokes

There were three guys at a bar.
One was a college student, one was a buisness man and the other was a biker.
The student tells the two other men that it was his aniversary and he got his wife a pearl necklace and a trip to the Bahamas "Shiт if she doesnt like the necklace she'll love the trip" he said.
So the buisness man said "That's nice, for my last aniversary I got my wife a Mercades and a new mansion, if she didn't like the mercades she has to like the new mansion. "
As the biker finished his drink he said "For my last aniversary I got my wife a t-shirt and a viвrатоr. If she didn't like the t-shirt she can go fuск herself."

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Student jokes School Jokes Men jokes Business jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes College jokes Cyclist Humor

If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.

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IT jokes Animal Jokes Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes

"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a соw for my farm."
"Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a соw?"
"I d look a dаrn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"

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Farmer Jokes Car and driving jokes Animal Jokes

Customer: "Waiter, there’s a dead beetle in my soup."
Waiter: "Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers."

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Waiter Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Chuck Norris will never die.
The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Teacher: How we use the light?
Pupil: To suск it?
Teacher: Why do you say so?
Pupil: Because every night, my mother says to my father, "Switch off the light, I wanna suск it!"

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School Jokes Dirty jokes

Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
Noah - he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.

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Religion jokes Money jokes Bible Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!

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Science jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Chemistry Jokes Nerd jokes

How can you know a lawyer is lying?
When he moves his lips.

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Lawyer Jokes

When a mime sees Chuck Norris, he makes a glass wall and pretends he's dead.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"

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Chuck Norris Jokes Military Jokes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owls say.
Owls say who?
Yep, that they do.

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Knock-knock jokes Animal Jokes Communication Jokes

Yo mama is so fат when she went on a rowing machine it sank.

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Vulgar jokes Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes

Yo Momma so fат, she steps on a scale and makes my phone number come up.

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Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes Phone jokes

Q: Why did the computer go to the dentist?
A: Because it had Bluetooth.

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Computer Jokes Dentist Jokes Nerd jokes

Yo momma so fат when she saw a bus she said come back Тwinкiе.

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Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes

Two men were walking through the woods when a large bear walked out into the clearing not more than fifty feet from them.
The first man dropped his backpack and dug out a pair of running shoes. Then, as the bear slowly approached them, he furiously attempted to lace them up.
The second man, somewhat confused, looked at the first man and said, "Whaddya doing? Running shoes ain’t gonna help! You can't outrun that there bear!"
"I don't need to outrun the bear, buddy," said the first man, "I just need to outrun you."

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Hunting Jokes Animal Jokes Men jokes

Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
A: ‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’!

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Pet Jokes Animal Jokes

Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises?
So oxygen can get into their brains.

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Dirty jokes Men vs Women Jokes Men jokes

Romi (to the doctor): "Doctor, my sister thinks that she is a lift."
Doctor: "Tell her to come in."
Romi: "I cannot"
Doctor: "Why so?"
Romi: "Because she does not stop at this floor."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes