Latest Jokes

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes

An Iraqi goes to the bank to get his salary from a French Company.
The Saudi manager of the bank asks him to sign on the back of the check.
"That's humiliation," shouts the Iraqi, "why should the French sign on the front and I sign on the back.
I want my money NOW!"
The Saudi refuse to pay him and the Iraqi keeps shouting in the bank then the American high manager comes with a 5kg hammer and knocks the Iraqi on the head.
After 5 minutes the Iraqi wakes up, signs the back of the check and gets his money.
The Saudi clerk goes to the Iraqi and asks, "Tell me why you didn't sign the check the first time but signed it later on?"
The Iraqi said,
"You missed the point, you just told it to me, but the American explained it."

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Money jokes

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

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Money jokes

I am currently experiencing an out-of-money experience.

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Money jokes

Chuck Norris is spelled with a silent "awesome".

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Chuck Norris Jokes

What is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute
Chicken goes cockadoodle do
Prostute goes any соск will do.

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Gross Jokes Animal Jokes

What do rabbits put in their computers?
Hoppy disks.

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Animal Jokes Computer Jokes

‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sеx maniac, but he failed his practical.’
Les Dawson

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Sex Jokes

When President Roosevelt dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima, he did so only because it was more human then sending Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Police Officer Jokes

You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

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Police Officer Jokes

A truck driver was pulled over by a State Trooper.
The patrolman told him to get out of the truck, and noticed that the driver appeared to be putting something in his mouth as he stepped out of the cab.
Figuring that the driver was putting away his pep pills, the patrolman asked "Did I just see you swallow something?"
"Yep, that was my birth control pill," said the driver.
"Birth control pill?" asked the patrolman.
"Yep, when I saw your light, I knew I was sсrеwеd."

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Police Officer Jokes

A man was found murdered in his home over the weekend.
Detectives at the scene found the man face down in his tub.
The tub had been filled with milk, and the deceased had a banana protruding from his buttocks.
Police suspect a cereal killer.

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Men jokes Police Officer Jokes

A stewardess approaches a passenger on a flight.
‘Would you care for an orange juice, sir?’
The passenger replies, ‘Sure, if it needed me.’

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes

John Smith lived in Staten Island, New York and worked in Manhattan.
He had to take the ferryboat home every night.
One evening, he got down to the ferry and found there was a wait for the next boat, so John decided to stop at a nearby tavern.
Before long he was feeling no pain.
When he got back to the ferry slip, the ferryboat was just eight feet from the dock.
Smith, afraid of missing this one and being late for dinner, took a running leap and landed right on the deck of the boat.
"How did you like that jump, buddy?" said a proud John to a deck hand.
"It was great," said the sailor.
"But why didn't you wait?
We were just pulling in!"

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Office and Work Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes

Did you hear about the drunк who thought Alcoholics Anonymous meant drinking under an assumed name?

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes

We call my father-in-law the exorcist.
Every time he visits he rids the house of spirits.

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes

Q:How do you find a man in a bar who is sensitive, caring and good looking?
A:He's nursing a Mike's Hard Lemonade and is acting super super gаy!

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Men jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes

A mink in the wardrobe often leads to a wolf at the door.

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Money jokes

Yo momma's so fат; she's in two time zones at the same time!

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Insult Jokes Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes

My doctor examined my testicles for me and found two small lumps.
Luckily it turned out they were my testicles.

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Sex Jokes