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Latest Jokes

- Does your horse smoke?
- No.
- Well, then I think your stable is burning.

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One-Liner Jokes

- Mom! I’m a 3d printer!
- Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you роор.

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One-Liner Jokes Gross Jokes Technology Jokes Kids Jokes

Women usually claim childbirth is the most painful experience of their lives.
Until they start stepping on Legos approximately three years later.

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One-Liner Jokes

I went to see the doctor about my short-term memory problems.
The first thing the ваsтаrd did was made me pay in advance.

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One-Liner Jokes

What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth?
A slow swimmer.

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Dark Humor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Why are eggs not very much into jokes?
Because they could сrаск up.

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One-Liner Jokes Bad Jokes

Dentist: "You need a crown."
Patient: "Finally someone who understands me"

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Dentist Jokes

What do you get when you wake up on a workday and realize you ran out of coffee?
A depresso.

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One-Liner Jokes Coffee Jokes

He: “When I see a sтuрid face I have to laugh.”
She: “Doesn’t that make shaving yourself kind of difficult?”

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Jokes

Have you seen those weird clowns that hide away from ugly people?
No, sorry, of course you haven’t.

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Jokes

One prison guard to the other: “Have you heard that prisoner 234 broke out yesterday?!”
The other guard: “Thank goodness. Finally the hammering racket stops.”

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Jokes

I love karma. I can do terrible things to all sorts of people whenever, wherever, and know the ваsтаrds deserved it.

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Jokes

Son comes home and yells: “Moooooooom!!!!”
Mother shouts from the first floor:
“If you want something, come up and tell me properly. I’m sick of your hollering.”
Son goes up and says: “Look, I stepped in dog роор.”

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Kids Jokes Dog jokes

A couple goes to a restaurant and the wife excuses herself to go to the bathroom. In the meantime, the waiter approaches to take their order.
The husband says, “I’ll have a вееr.”
The waiter asks: “And what about your wife? Do you want a вееr for her?”
Man: “You know what, that’s a fair trade. Deal!”

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Waiter Jokes Good jokes Beer Jokes Restaurant Jokes

People sometimes tell me scary things, like “You have a great inner beauty.”
I’m just thinking: “Stay away from my kidneys.”

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Jokes

In the car repair shop:
Customer: “Can you save my car?”
Repair man: “I believe we could, by sсrеwing a new car in between the license plates.”

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Jokes

A guest calls the waiter: “Please try my soup.”
Waiter: “What’s the problem? Too salty?”
Guest: “No. Just try my soup.”
Waiter: “What then, is it too cold?”
Guest: “No. Please try my soup.”
Waiter: “Is it too hot?”
Guest: “No it isn’t. Can you just please try my soup already?”
Waiter: “But there’s no spoon.”
Guest: “Finally!”

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Waiter Jokes

“I will be contacting my lawyer” is the adult version of “I’m telling my mom”.

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Judge and Court Jokes Lawyer Jokes

My wife is my Strength. All the other Women are my Weakness

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Men jokes

(You): Do you wipe your вuтт with your right or your left hand?
(Victim): With my right hand.
(You): That’s disgusting. I use toilet paper.

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Jokes