Attitude Jokes

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If by free spirits you mean an open bar, then yes I love free spirits.

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Attitude Jokes

I became a vegetarian - switched to wееd.

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Attitude Jokes

Facebook is telling me to "reconnect" with my brother... Hmmm, I see him everyday

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Facebook Jokes Attitude Jokes

You could very well be going to heaven but it won't be hеll in hеll without you!

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Attitude Jokes

I'm trying to get on your good side, but I haven't found it yet.

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Attitude Jokes

Why, yes, I am dressed for the weather. I am wearing a house.

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Attitude Jokes

I hate when I'm singing along to the Beastie Boys and they mess up the lyrics.

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Attitude Jokes

I don't do different things... It's just that I do things differently!

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Attitude Jokes

You're about as useful as a bucket without a bottom.

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Attitude Jokes

I'm sure there's a supplement I could take or another easy solution to cure my laziness. Someone look into it for me.

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Attitude Jokes

If a stranger offers you a piece of candy... Take two.

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Attitude Jokes

My life is a lot like that driver who signals right, but turns left.

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Attitude Jokes

To the question ‘What are you doing here?' 72% answered negative.

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Attitude Jokes

There are few things I enjoy more than picking an argument with my girlfriend when she has the hiccups.

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Attitude Jokes

I wish conversations were like user agreements where I could skip to the end and just agree.

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Attitude Jokes

When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper "You did this."

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Attitude Jokes

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

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Attitude Jokes

At Comic Соn, all I could think was how happy these people's moms must be to have the house to themselves for a few hours.

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Attitude Jokes

Me: Let's stay in bed. Me also: Good idea.

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Attitude Jokes

Remember, everyone seems normal until you get to know them...

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Attitude Jokes