Dirty jokes

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I love creature comfort. That's why when I'm coming off a relationship, I like to shave my left leg. That way when I roll over at night, it feels like there's a woman in bed with me.

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Relationship Jokes

$27 million to find gаys in the army -- $27 million? Walk up to a guy, go, 'Clang, clang, clang,' -- if he goes, 'Went the trolley,' you found him. Save the money.

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Money jokes Dirty jokes

At least сunтs are useful you're not.

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Dirty jokes

Spell:
"Racecar" backwards
Spell:
"Dogfoodlid" backwards
*Hint: USE A PIECE PAPER

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Dirty jokes

Nixon, Carter, Kennedy are on a boat. The boat's going down. Carter says, 'Women and children first.' Nixon says, 'Sсrеw them.' Kennedy says, 'Do you think we have time?'

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Jokes about Women Dirty jokes

How do all those drugs enter into our prisons they are smuggled in by some asshole

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Dirty jokes

How 'bout jollying my roger? Yar!

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Dirty jokes

"Daddy, do butterflies have really small penises?"
Parenting books didn't prepare me for that and I am NOT Googling butterfly diскs.

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Dirty jokes

Never judge a book by it’s cover. I ordered a book online last week from Holland called ‘Creamy Jugs’ only to find it’s a book about 18th century cattle farming equipment.

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Dirty jokes

So a kid goes up to his father and says..
"Dad I had sеx today!" Then the Dad says
"Good son good come sit down with me".
Then the kid says.. "I cant, my аss hurts".

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes

For christmas a little boy asked Santa "Please can you send me a sister?" So Santa answers "Okay just send me your mum!"

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Dirty jokes Christmas Jokes

There was a grandpa and a kid on a porch and the grandpa had a cigar and the boy said CAN I HAVE ONE! And the grandpa then said can your реnis touch your аss and the boy said no so then the grandpa said then you can't have one. Later the boy had some cookies and the grandpa said can I have one? And the boy said can your реnis touch your аss and the grandpa said НЕLL YEAH!! So the boy said THEN GO FUСК YOURSELF THESE ARE MY COOKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

Two Girls were sitting at a club. One was ugly and the other one was beautiful. Anant walked straight to the ugly girl.
Anant: Hello! Ugly girl: Hi!! Anant: Wanna dance? Ugly Girl: Yes (excited)
Anant: OK, Go and dance, I wanna talk to your friend

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Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes

I heard the doctor ask the kid how is your рussy,is it num or hоrny or feels like it needs some spice

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Kids Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dirty jokes

In and Out.
Long and short.
Big and small.
Hard and soft.
Suck and вlоw.
Spit and swallow.
Love and hate.
Boy and girls
Dicks and рussiеs.
Hope you like Dirтy opposites. btw This has happened.

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Dirty jokes

Girl: You're sтuрid!
Boy:No I'm not!
Girl: okay then sing the alphabet!
Boy Ok here it is a,b,c,e,f,g,h,I,j,k,l,m,n,o,p,q,r,s,t,u,v,w,x,y,z. Done!
Girl: you missed out a letter!
Boy: I know I'll give you the d later...

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Dirty jokes

Why is Wednesday called huмр day when most people get laid on the weekends?

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Dirty jokes

You guys act like being a stalker is easy. Do you know how hard it is to маsтurвате while holding binoculars?

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Dirty jokes

Kid: you no I want for Christmas. Santa:what? Kid: a boner

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes Christmas Jokes

I can do some things now that I couldn't do when I was 17, like date high school girls.

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School Jokes Dirty jokes