Skip to main content

  • Home
  • Categories
  • Popular
  • Funny pictures
  • Most Popular Jokes
  • Latest Jokes
  • Jokes about Women
  • Religion jokes
  • Office and Work Jokes
  • Gross Jokes
  • Sports Jokes
  • School Jokes
  • Marriage and Family Jokes
  • Kids Jokes
  • Medical and Doctor Jokes
  • Dark Humor Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Animal Jokes
  • Dirty jokes
  • Chuck Norris Jokes
  • Donald Trump Jokes
  • Drinking and Drunk Jokes
  • Putin Jokes
  • Sex Jokes
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Jewish Jokes
  • Police Officer Jokes
  • Weed Jokes
  • Old People Jokes
  • Mother-in-Law Jokes
  • Masturbation jokes
  • Political Jokes
  • Vulgar jokes
  • Genie jokes
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Nurse jokes
  • Psychology and Psychiatry Jokes
  • Knock-knock jokes
  • Scottish Jokes
  • Soccer Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Dad Jokes
  • Gynecology Jokes
  • Rude Jokes
Вицове за кучета Dog jokes Hundewitze Chistes de perros Вицове про собак Blagues sur les chiens Barzellette sui cani Ανέκδοτα για σκύλους Вицеви за кучиња Köpek Fıkraları Жарти про собак Piadas de Cães Dowcipy o psach Hundskämt Honden Moppen Vittigheder - Hunde Vitser om hunder Koiravitsit Kutyás viccek Glume despre câini Vtipy o psech Anekdotai apie šunis Joki par suņiem Vicevi o psima
My Jokes Edit Profile Logout
  1. Home
  2. Dog jokes

Dog jokes

Most popular in this category
Do you speak english? Αχμέτ Χουσεϊν Temel Amerika'ya gelir uçaktan iner pasaport olayı filan falan - Do you speak English? Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" — Qual o seu nome? "Name?" Neulich bei der Einwanderungsbehörde:,"Name?","Abu Dalah Sarafi.","Sex?","Four times a week.","No, no, no... male or female?","Male, female... sometimes camel..." No balcão da Alfandega: Seu nome ? Abu Abdalah Sarafi. Sexo? Quatro vezes por semana. Não, não, não! Homem ou mulher? Homem, mulher. Algumas vezes camelo. - Name? - Abdul Anubi al-Dzabiri. - Sex? - Four times a week - No, no, male or female? - Male, female, sometimes camel... En man som är dålig på engelska kommer in på en arbetsförmedling i Holland för att söka jobb! - Name - Abu Dalah Sarafi. - Sex? - Four times a week. - No, no, no, male or female? - Male,... Q: Your name please? A: Abdul Aziz Q: Sex? A: Yes. Two times every week. Q: No no. I mean, Male or Female? A: Not matter. Sometimes also camel ! An arab at the airport: - Name? - Abdul al-Rhazib. - Sex? - Three to five times a week. - No, no... I mean male or female? - Male, female, sometimes camel. - Holy cow! - Cow, sheep, animals in... An arab at the airport: - Name? - Abdul al Rahzib. - Sex? - Three to five times a week. - No, no...I mean Male or female? - Male, female, sometimes camel. - Holy cow! - Yes, cow, sheep,... Q: Naam? A: Abdul Asis Q: Sexe? A: Ja iedere week 2 keer. Q: Nee, ik bedoel man of vrouw? A: Maakt niet uit, soms ook kameel. En la oficina árabe le atienden por teléfono: - ¿Me dice su nombre, por favor? - Jawad Gadaff - ¿Sexo? - 1 vez al día, pero no siempre. - ¡No, hombre, no! Me refiero, ¿hombre o mujer? - Correcto,... All’Ufficio Immigrazioni: – Nome? – Mhoamhed. – Sesso? – 5 volte alla settimana. – Ma non in quel senso: maschio o femmina? – No importa, a volte anche con cammelli. Chiedono a Gheddafi: "ciao, nome?" e lui: "Gheddafi", e poi: "sesso?" e lui risponde: "cinque volte al giorno!" e loro chiedono: "con maschio o femmina?" e lui: "va bene anche cammello!". - NAME? - Muhjmatil Ahmed. - SEX? - Three times a week! - NO, I MEAN; MALE OR FEMALE? - Doesnt matter. Sometimes even with camel... - Name? - Abdul al-Rhazib. - Sex? - Three to five times a week. - No, no! I mean male or female? - Male, female, sometimes camel... - Holy cow! - Yes. Cow, sheep... animals in general. - But isn't... An Arab at the airport: - 'Name?' - 'Abdul al-Rhazib.' - 'Sex?' - 'Three to five times a week.' - 'No, no... I mean male or female?' - 'Male, female, sometimes camel.' - 'Holy cow!' - 'Yes, cow,...
Interviewer: - Your name?
Saudi: Ahmed.
Interviewer: Sеx?
Saudi: 8 times a week.
Interviewer: Sorry, i meant male or female..
Saudi: Males, females, shemales, and sometimes even camels.
Interviewer: Holy соw!
Saudi: Yea, cows and goats, too.
Interviewer: Gosh, isn't that hostile?
Saudi: Horse style, dog style, any style!
Interviewer: Oh, dear!
Saudi: Nah, no deer, they run too fast!
2 0
0
Dog jokes
A man was shipwrecked with his dog and a sheep on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere.
Everytime the man moved close to the sheep, his dog would snarl and growl at him. One day while walking the island he discovered a lovely nакеd lady who also had just become marooned. "Finally, some company!" he thought. While sitting on the shore and the watching the sunset with his new female friend, he slowly leaned over and whispered in her ear, ''Hey, could you go walk the dog?''
19 0
0
Gross Jokes Dog jokes
3 bums were outside a bar.The first one went in and asked for a fork.The second one went in and also asked for a fork. Then the third one went in and wanted a straw. At this point, the bartender became curious.
"How come all your friends want forks and you want a straw?"
"Well," the вuм said, "the dog threw up and the chunks are all gone."
22 0
0
Gross Jokes Animal Jokes Friendship Jokes Dog jokes
Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot?
Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, ''come Spot, come Spot!''
0 0
0
Bill Clinton Jokes Gross Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Animal Jokes Political Jokes Dog jokes American Presidents Humor
A guy walks into a bar and sees a dog lying in the corner licking his balls. Jimmy was staring at a dog in the park whilst the dog was licking himself in inappropriate parts and said to his dad, "I wish I could do that." Jimmy's dad looked down at Jimmy and said, "Maybe if you ask the dog nicely, he might let you!" These two drunks walk out of a bar and see a dog across the streets licking its own nuts. First guy says "Man, sure wish I could do that." Second says "I dunno, I think I'd pet him first." Dos amigos ven a un perro que se está lamiendo los cojones. - ¡Cómo me gustaría poder hacer eso mismo! - dice uno de ellos -. Y el otro contesta: - Bueno, pero antes intimarías un poco con el... Kaksi ruotsalaista olivat puistossa, kun he huomasivat koiran olevan pusikossa nuolemassa sukupuolielimiään ja sai suurta mielihyvää. - Mitä ihmettä se oikein tekee? kysyi Börje. - Göran, joskus... To menn ser på en hund slikke seg nedentil. Den ene mannen sier: "Jeg skulle ønske jeg kunne gjøre det!" "Virkelig?" sier den andre. "Jeg hadde bare tenkt å klappe den."
Jeremy and Kris walk down the street and see a dog licking himself.
Jeremy says, "Man, I wish I could do that!"
Kris replies, "I think you'd have to pet him first."
34 0
0
Gross Jokes Men jokes Dog jokes
Q: Why does a dog liск himself?
A: He can't make a fist.
19 0
0
Gross Jokes Animal Jokes Dog jokes
По какво се различава късоръкият гинеколог от дългоръкия? - По какво си приличат здравото куче и късогледият гинеколог? Препознавање Schäferhunde und Gynäkologen - Что общего у здорового пса и близорукого гинеколога? У близорукого гинеколога всегда мокрый нос. Quel est le point commun entre un chiot et un gynécologue myope ? Mitä yhtäläistä on koiranpennulla ja likinäköisellä gynekologilla? Märkä nenä.. Woran erkennt man einen kurzsichtigen Gynäkologen? An der feuchten Nase. Hva er likheten på en gynekolog og en hund? - Begge er våte på nesen...
Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common?
A: Wet noses.
0 0
0
Gross Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Gynecology Jokes Dog jokes
Q: Why do dogs liск their ваlls?
A: Because they can.
Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches?
A: Same reason.
29 0
0
Gross Jokes Jokes about Women Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Dog jokes
A farmer is in the middle of plowing his field when his tractor runs out of gas. He needs to get back to the farm, but it's too far for him and his dog, Old Joe, to walk.
He wanders out to the road and flags down a sports car. The driver says, "I'll give you a ride, but that dog can't get in my car."
The farmer says, "Don't worry. Old Joe will keep up."
The driver decides to show off and open up the engine for max speed. Just as he's going into fifth gear, he looks out the window and sees Old Joe right beside him. In amazement, he slams on the brakes and Old Joe comes to a halt.
The driver jumps out, exclaiming, "He's the most incredible dog I've ever seen! Is there something special about that collar he's wearing?"
The farmer shakes his head and says, "That's not a collar. That's his a**hole. He's not used to stopping that fast."
0 0
0
Car and driving jokes Dog jokes
A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks the bartender in the eye and says, "Hey, guess what? I can talk. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? How about a drink?"
The bartender thinks for a moment and says, "Sure, the toilet's right around the corner."
0 0
0
Bar and Bartender Jokes Dog jokes
A blind man walks into a bar with his seeing-eye dog. He stands in the center of the bar, takes the dog by the chain, and starts swinging him above his head.
Everyone stops and stares. Upset about the way the animal is being treated, a patron runs up to the blind man and demands, "What the hеll are you doing?"
The blind man turns toward the patron and says, "Oh, nothing, just looking around."
0 0
0
Bar and Bartender Jokes Dog jokes
A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender says, "No pets allowed."
The man replies, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips."
The Jets keep scoring field goals, and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
"Wow! What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?"
The man replies, "I don't know. I've only had him for 7 years."
0 0
0
Bar and Bartender Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her parents had to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.
0 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she got hauled into the dog pound for walking down the street without a license.
0 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so uptight, when she farts, only dogs can hear it.
0 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her dog closes its eyes when it humps her leg.
0 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so nasty, when her dog farts, she takes the credit.
27 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Insult Jokes Animal Jokes Fart Jokes Dog jokes
Yo' Mama is so ugly, when she ran away from home, her parents called the dog catcher.
0 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
How much do I owe Yo' Mama? My dog came home happy last night.
How much do I owe Yo' Mama? My dog came home happy last night.
1 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Dog jokes
Beißt Ihr Hund? Estaba un tipo con un perro a su lado, cuando pasa alguien y le pregunta: Per la strada una signora vede un bambino con in braccio un cane. "Il tuo cane morde se gli accarezzo la testa?" domanda la signora. Il ragazzo risponde di no e la signora allunga la mano per toccare il cane che però la morde. "Hai detto che il tuo cane non mordeva" strilla. "Sì, signora, il... A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog. He asks the shopkeeper, "Does your dog bite?" The shopkeeper says, "No, my dog does not bite." The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him. "Ouch!" He says, "I thought you said your dog does not bite!" The shopkeeper replies, "That is... A man walking down the streets sees another man with a very big dog. One man says to the other, "Does your dog bite?" The man replies, "No my dog doesn't." The man pats the dog and has his hand bitten off, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite" said the injured man. "Thats not my dog",... Man walks into a shop and sees a very handsome dog. He asks the shop assistant, "Does your dog bite?" "No, my dog doesn't bite." The man happily tries to pet the dog, but the dog attacks him...
A hound dog lays in the yard and an old man in overalls sits on the porch.
"Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?" a jogger asks.
The old man looks over his newspaper and replies, "Nope."
As soon as the jogger enters the yard, the dog begins snarling and growling, and then attacks the jogger's legs. As the jogger flails around in the yard, he yells, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite!"
The old man mutters, "Ain't my dog."
43 0
0
Animal Jokes Men jokes Dog jokes
  • Previous
Privacy and Policy Contact Us