One-Liner Jokes

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“The doctor told the patient to use a Q-tip. It went in one ear and out the other.”

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

What does a blonde do when she wakes up? Go home!

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

The guy who sipped his beers was into malt licker.

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes One-Liner Jokes Beer Jokes

A customer walked into a bar and said, “I’ll have a pint of less, please.”
“Less?” queried the bartender. “What’s that?”
“I don’t know either,” said the customer, “but my doctor told me to drink less.”

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"I wonder why old man Smith puts all his savings under his pillow every night?"
"Maybe he wants people to know that he has enough money to retire on?"

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One-Liner Jokes

“Brewery workers demand for concessional вееr for their consumption, was considered on a case by case basis, and a ration-ale decision was reached by the management.”

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes One-Liner Jokes Beer Jokes

Social climbers are trying to reach higher into the statusphere.

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One-Liner Jokes

Just fired my baker; she wasn't meeting my kneads.

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One-Liner Jokes

What do you get when you cross an impressionist painter with a New York City cab driver? A: You get Vincent Van Go Fuск Yourself.

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One-Liner Jokes

What did the blonde do when he heard that 90% of accidents occur within five miles of home? He moved ten miles away.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I dont care about the museum, I only care that people think Im the kind of guy who goes to museums.

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One-Liner Jokes

Descartes walked into a bar and ordered a вееr.
“Want another?” asked the bartender.
“I think not,” Descartes replied. Then he disappeared.

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes One-Liner Jokes Beer Jokes

Eating beans gives me a pulse hating headache.

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One-Liner Jokes

Rabbi 1: We've got to do something. Many of the young people in our synagogue are converting to the Quaker faith.
Rabbi 2: I've noticed that too. In fact, some of my best Jews are Friends!

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One-Liner Jokes

Chck Norris listens to "Requiem for a Tower" when he eats waffles.

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One-Liner Jokes

Cleaning mud can lead to a life of grime. It's a slippery slop.

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One-Liner Jokes

A man with a bag of Lays potato сhiрs taunted Chuck Norris:
"Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris ate the сhiрs, the bag, and the man.

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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes

I made the mistake of moving in with a hippie. Hippie roommate -- horrible mistake. Apparently, when they say peace and love, what they really mean is filthy and annoying.

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One-Liner Jokes

Prison is just one word to you...
But for some people, it's a whole sentence.

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One-Liner Jokes

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.
The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face.
The egg is frowning and looking a bit рissеd off.
The egg mutters, to no one in particular, "Well, I guess we answered THAT question!"

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One-Liner Jokes Sex Jokes