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Christmas Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
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Christmas Jokes Old People Jokes
Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A:
"Wrap" music!
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Christmas Jokes Music and Musician Jokes
If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
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Christmas Jokes Flirt jokes Love Jokes
A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars?
A: Elfis!
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Christmas Jokes Music and Musician Jokes
Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas?
A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
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Christmas Jokes Mexican jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes
yo mommas so fат when Santa comes down the chimley he saids hо hо holy shiт..........
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USA Jokes Christmas Jokes Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes
Q: Why does Santa have an accountant in the USA?
A: So he can avoid Gift Taxes.
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Accountant Jokes Money jokes USA Jokes Christmas Jokes Tax jokes
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
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Zwischen den Feiertagen Zwischen Weihnachten und Silvester Ham: Hej, jeg synes du har meget pæne ben, er det i orden jeg kalder dem jul og påske? Hende: Ja? Ham: Hva’ så med at invitere mig på ferie mellem højtiderne? If Thanksgiving is your left leg and Christmas is your right leg, can I visit between the holidays? Hey girl, if your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I cum between the holidays?
Christmas Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Halloween Jokes Flirt jokes
Chicken to turkey:
"Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
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Animal Jokes Food Jokes Christmas Jokes Thanksgiving Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas?
Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
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Christmas Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Music and Musician Jokes
One night on christmas eve, santa came down the chimney. He was putting toys under the tree for the good girls and boys of the house.
When he got the errie feeling that someone was staring at him.
He turned around and sure enough a lady in a nelgiee was looking at him.
When she noticed santa looking at her she said, "Santa can you stay, can yuo stay?"
Santa, "Hey, hey hey, me have to go. Have to deliever toys for good girls and boys."
So then she pulled down her negliee and showed santa her вrеаsт. "Santa, can you stay, can you stay?"
Santa, "Hey, hey, hey. Me got to go. Have to deliever toys to good girls and boys."
Then she took off everything and stood nакеd in front of santa and said, "Santa can you stay, can you stay?"
Santa, "Hey,hey, hey. Me have to stay. Can't go up the chimney this a way!"
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Dirty jokes Christmas Jokes
Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status?
A: Elf-employed.
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Christmas Jokes Tax jokes
The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven't seen for 20 minutes.
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Christmas Jokes Office and Work Jokes Partying and Bad Behavior Jokes
Q: What do Christmas trees and priests have in common?
A: Their ваlls are just for decoration.
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По какво си приличат свещеника и коледното дърво? Στολίδια Ποιά η ομοιότητα ανάμεσα σε έναν γέρο και στο Χριστουγεννιάτικο δέντρο; Τα μπαλάκια Quelle est la différence entre un curé et un arbre de Noël ? Quelle est la différence entre un curé et un sapin de Noël ? Aucune: dans les deux cas les boules servent uniquement à décorer. ou bien Les boules du sapin servent au moins une fois dans l'année ! A willy is like a tree in your 20's its like a rock hard oak. In your 30's & 40's its like a birch tree, flexible but reliable. After your 50's its like a xmas tree, dead from the roots up & the... How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar? Both their balls are decoration only. Hvad er ligheden imellem et juletræ og en steriliseret mand? - Kuglerne hænger kun til pynt Hvad er ligheden på en munk og et juletræ? - Kuglene er kun til pynt. Wat is de overeenkomst tussen de paus en een kerstboom? Bij allebei hangen de ballen er voor de sier! - Mi a közös a pap és a karácsonyfa között? - ???? - Mind a kettőn díszek a golyók. Qual a semelhança entre uma Árvore de Natal e um padre? As bolas são só de enfeite! Le sapin de noël et le curé Quelle est la différence entre un sapin de noël et un curé? Dans les deux cas les boules sont là que pour faire joli What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? They both have balls just for decoration.
God Jokes Religion jokes Christmas Jokes Priest Jokes Christian Jokes Priest Jokes
Santa rides in a sleigh.
What do elves ride in?
Mini vans!
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Car and driving jokes Christmas Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes
My dad was a complicated man.
He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know?
Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was black — that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.
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Ethnic and Racial Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes Christmas Jokes Dad Jokes Black People Jokes
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
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Christmas Jokes
The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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Christmas Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
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Christmas Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Food Jokes
What has antlers, pulls Father Christmas sleigh and is made of cement?
I don't know.
A reindeer.
What about the cement?
I just threw that in to make it hard.
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Christmas Jokes Animal Jokes
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