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Dark Humor Jokes

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Седмоодделенецот што и се пуштал на соученичката Десетокластничка се прибира вкъщи се оплаква на баща си: - Papa, je ne comprends pas, mon copain m'a dit que j'avais un joli châssis, deux beaux amortisseurs et un magnifique pare-chocs... - Et bien dis à ton copain, que s'il ouvre le moteur pour y... Une fille va voir son père et lui demande : - Papa, je n'ai pas compris, mon copain m'a dis que j'avais châssis, deux beaux amortisseurs et un magnifique pare-chocs. Qu'est-ce que ça veut dire ?... Lány az apjának: - Apa, egy srác olyat mondott, amit nem értek. Azt mondta, hogy szép a szélvédőm, gyönyörű a csomagtartóm és a futóművem, jó a kasztnim és kifogástalanok az ütközőim. Ez mit... - Papá, ayer empecé a salir con mi nuevo novio. Es mecánico, y me dijo que tengo 2 bellos amortiguadores además de 2 magníficos parachoques. - ¡Dile a tu novio que si abre el capó y mide el aceite... Dívka hovoří k otci: Tati…Jeden chlapec ve škole mi řekl něco , čemu jsem tak docela nerozuměla. Říkal že mám pěkný čelní sklo , překrásný kufr , super karosérii a moje nárazníky jsou bezchybné….... Iskolából hazajövet a lány közli Édesapjával: " - Apuci ma az iskolában az egyik fiú mondta olyasmit mondott nekem, amit nem értek: szép a szélvédőm, gyönyörű a csomagtartóm, jó a kasznim és... Ateina dešimtokė pas tėvą: - Tėti, man vienas vaikinas pasakė, kad mano apdaila nebloga, didelis bamperis ir kad būtų įdomu pažiūrėti, kas yra po kapotu... Ką tai reiškia? - Tu jam perduok, kad tau... Κόρη: - Μπαμπά, εχθές ένας νεαρός από το σχολείο, μου είπε κάτι που δεν το καταλαβαίνω. Μου είπε ότι έχω καταπληκτικό σασί, δυο πανέμορφα αμορτισέρ και δυο φοβερούς προφυλακτήρες. Τί εννοούσε;...
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever.
Me: What's that hunny?
Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk.
Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
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Dad Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Dirty jokes Black People Jokes
What do you get when you have sеx with a pregnant woman?
A baby with a black eye!
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Baby Jokes Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes Sex Jokes
A woman is speaking to her friend, ‘My husband has got one foot in the grate.’
‘Don’t you mean one foot in the “grave”?’ says the friend.
‘No,’ replies the woman.
‘He wants to be cremated.’
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Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes Friendship Jokes
Doctor:
"You have cataract in your eyes. But you need not worry It is hereditary."
Patient:
"Death is also hereditary. Does it mean we should not worry about it?"
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Medical and Doctor Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
Woman patient:
"Doctor I was suffering so much that I wanted to die."
Doctor:
"You did the right thing to call me."
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Jokes about Women Medical and Doctor Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night ?
Crib death.
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Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes
What's red and dances all around?
A baby on a barbecue
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Dark Humor Jokes
Daddy to his son:
I don't care if you are dating a black girl - they are all pink on the inside.
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Dark Humor Jokes
Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A: Shoot him before he hits the water.
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Lawyer Jokes Dark Humor Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Eliz Wright: Down With O.P.P.
I know a lady who blew her man's jimmy off because he wanted to be down with O.P.P. Now he down with No P.P.
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Police Officer Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes
Нiтlеr: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
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Hitler Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Jewish Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunк and made love to it the night before.
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Dark Humor Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Sex Jokes Morbid jokes Dead baby jokes
I don't like black jokes because I have one in my family tree. He's still hanging there. Καλα όλα αυτά τα ρατσιστικά αλλά απλά σας το λεω να το ξέρετε οτι δεν είμαι ρατσιστής, άλωστε στο οικογενειακό μας δέντρο εμείς έχουμε έναν μαύρο. Ακόμα εκεί κρέμεται...
Black Jokes are not funny I have a black guy in my family way up in my family tree.
He's been hanging there for quite a while.
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Marriage and Family Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Black People Jokes
My previous girlfriend had this weird sleeping disorder - in the middle of every night she would wake up and suск my diск.
No wonder her dad did not want her to move out.
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Dark Humor Jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson?
He thought he would give him a paunch!
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Sports Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Food Jokes Dark Humor Jokes
A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter"
The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?"
The man says" Active? Неll no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
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Medical and Doctor Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes Old People Jokes
Why do cannibals make suitcases out of people's heads?
Because they're headcases.
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Dark Humor Jokes Morbid jokes Cannibal Jokes
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I rареd didn't stand a chance.
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Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes Sex Jokes
Only nowadays there appeared a possibility to realize yourselfe: sell your liver, kidneis, skeleton...
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Dark Humor Jokes
What do you call a doll on fire?
A Barbie-Q!
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Men vs Women Jokes Dark Humor Jokes
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