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Fart Jokes

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So we were working with a new client at work and my boss farts, he said "a little gas never killed anyone
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Fart Jokes Boss Jokes
There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunк, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.
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Animal Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Military Jokes Fart Jokes Dog jokes
Dad, did you fart?
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Fart Jokes
A South African Pastor who claims to heal people by farting on their faces, claims he farts the holy spirit.
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Fart Jokes
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her farts are classified as biological weapons.
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Yo Momma Jokes Science jokes Fart Jokes
Защо мирише пръднята? Pourquoi les pets puent ? Pour en faire profiter les sourds. Vous savez pourquoi les pets puent ? Pour que les sourds en profitent ! Warum stinken Fürze? Damit taube Menschen auch Spaß dran haben. Porque los pedos además de ruido tienen olor ? ... Para que los sordos también lo disfruten jajajaja Ved du hvorfor en fis lugter? Ved du hvorfor en fis lugter?? - Det er for de døve også kan få gavn af den. Οι πορδές βρωμάνε για να ωφεληθούν επίσης οι κωφοί.
Q: Why do farts smell?
A: So deaf people can enjoy them, too.
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Gross Jokes Dirty jokes Disability Jokes Fart Jokes
If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fаrт.
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Gross Jokes Insult Jokes Fart Jokes
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: He freakin' felt like it!
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Animal Jokes Food Jokes Fart Jokes
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls."
I told my husband that I would be home by midnight. "I promise!"
Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3 a.m., a bit blitzed, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution (even when totally smashed), in order to escape a possible conflict with him.
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him midnight.
He didn't seem disturbed at all.
(Whew! Got away with that one!).
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."
When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed 3 times, then said, "Oh, сrар," cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the cat and farted."
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Pet Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Animal Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Fart Jokes
The teacher asked little Johnny to use the word "definitely" in a sentence.
Little Johnny replies, "Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?" The teacher says, "Of course not Johnny", To which Johnny replies, "Then I have definitely s**t my pants."
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School Jokes Gross Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Fart Jokes
Why should you never fаrт in an apple store?
They don't have Windows!
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IT jokes Computer Jokes Fart Jokes
Yo mama is so old that when she farts, dust comes out!
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Yo Momma Jokes Food Jokes Old People Jokes Fart Jokes
Whats the difference between a gаy guy and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesnt fаrт when you take the meat out
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Gay and Lesbian Jokes Gross Jokes Food Jokes Fart Jokes What's The Difference Jokes
Отива един при лекаря. Gassy Granny Blähungen Една старица отива на лекар. Той я пита какъв е проблема и. Старата жена казва: Баба отива на лекар. This little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with passing gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. “Dottore, ho un problema, faccio flatulenze di continuo, però non puzzano mai”,“Provi a farne una per farmi sentire”,Il paziente emette la sua flatulenza e il dottore esclama:,“Il suo problema è grave, bisogna operare con urgenza!”,“Dottore, al sedere?”,“No, al naso!” Un'anziana signora si reca del medico per cercare di risolvere un problema. "Dottore ho un problema di gas intestinali. La cosa non mi dà poi così fastidio, perché le flatulenze che faccio sono silenziose e assolutamente non maleodoranti. Però ecco un po' mi infastidisce; ad esempio, da quando... Kommt eine ältere Dame zum Arzt und sagt: "Sie, ich muss immer viele kleine Fürze lassen, aber das mach nichts, die stinken nicht und hören tut man sie auch nicht! Sehen Sie, seit ich hier bei Ihnen bin, habe ich bestimmt schon 10 mal gefurzt!" Da holt der Arzt eine Schachtel Tabletten hervor... Una vieja va al médico para atenderse: - Doctor, doctor, le cuento que sufro de muchos gases; pero por lo menos no huelen ni se escuchan. Vea, me acabo de tirar como quince y usted ni cuenta se dió. El doctor le recetó una medicina y le dijo que vuelva en una semana. La semana siguiente, la... En gammal man går till doktorn med en pinsam åkomma. – Jag släpper väder hela tiden. Det luktar inte och det låter ingenting, men det är väldigt obekvämt. Jag har faktiskt gjort det 20 gånger redan sedan jag kom in hit, berättar mannen. Läkaren tänker en stund och ger honom sedan ett recept. – Ta... Een klein oud vrouwtje gaat naar de dokter en zegt: "Dokter, ik heb een probleem met "scheetjes laten", het stoort mij eigenlijk niet, want mijn winden zijn altijd stil en ze ruiken niet. Eigenlijk... A 90 year old women goes to the doctor. Dr i can't stop farting, sure they don't smell and make no noise but still i can't take it any more. Well take these pills every day and come back in a week.... Um senhora bem velhinha vai ao médico e diz: — Doutor, eu tenho este problema com gases, mas realmente isso não me aborrece muito. Eles não cheiram e sempre são silenciosos. Vou lhe dar um exemplo.... Um velhinho foi ao médico e chegando lá, o médico pergunta: — Então, qual é o seu problema? — Bom, eu tem realmente um problema, mas não me incomoda muito. Vivo peidando aonde eu for. Vou dar um...
An old woman goes to the doctor complaining of extremely smelly gas.
“I don’t understand it, Doc”, she said, “I have this terrible, terrible gas”. “Thankfully”, she added, “they are at least silent when I fаrт”.
Doctor hands her a bottle of pills, tells her take them all and then come back to see him.
The old woman returned a short time later extremely mad. “I took those pills like you said and not only is my gas smelly, but now when I fаrт they are obnoxiously loud!”, she yelled.
The doctor said, “well, now that we’ve solved your hearing problem, let’s see what we can do about that gas”.
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Medical and Doctor Jokes Old People Jokes Fart Jokes
If a king farts, is it a noble gas?
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Fart Jokes
There once was 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said this is disgusting and threw it out the window the 2nd man bit into a banana and said this is rotten and he threw it out the window the 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed " ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT" and he threw it out the window. Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying he replied an apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head! the police officer said that is weird and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked why are you crying and he answered a banana came flying out of the sky and hit he on the head the officer said this has been a strange day. Then he says a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said while he was laughing my dad farted and the house blew up.
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Aviation Jokes Fart Jokes
What do you call a ghosts fаrт?
A spirit bomb
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Fart Jokes
What do you call a farting boxer???
Gaseous Clay
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Fart Jokes
Les enfants c'est comme les pets, on supporte que les siens. Децата са като пръднята, търпим само нашата....
Children are like farts.
You can only tolerate your own.
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Fart Jokes
Clean and funny fаrт jokes (family friendly)
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Fart Jokes
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