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Insult Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
You've got two brain cells: one is in a wheelchair and the other one is pushing.
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Insult Jokes
Kid: I'm way better than you!
Me: At being a f*cking cunt
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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes
Donald Trump steps out onto the White House lawn in the dead of winter. Right in front of him, on the White House lawn, he sees, “Donald Trump Suскs” written in urinе across the snow. ….
….
Well, he’s is pretty ticked off. He storms into his security staff’s HQ, and yells, “Somebody wrote an insult in the snow on the dамn front lawn! And they wrote it in urinе! Whoever did it had to be standing right on the porch when he did it! Where were you guys?!”
The security guys stay silent and stare ashamedly at the floor.
Trump hollers “Well dаммiт, don’t just sit there! Get out and find out who did it! I want an answer, and I want it tonight!”
The entire staff immediately jump up and race for the exits.
Later that evening, his chief security officer approaches him and says:
“Well, Mr. President, we have some bad news and we have some really bad news. Which do you want first?”
Trump says “Give me the bad news first.”
The officer says “Well, we took a sample of the urinе and tested it. The results just came back, and it was Mike Pence’s urinе.”
Trump says “Oh my God, I feel so… so… betrayed! My own vice president! Dамn. …Well, what’s the really bad news?”
The officer replies “Well, it’s Melania’s handwriting.”
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Office and Work Jokes News and Politics Jokes Insult Jokes God Jokes Political Jokes
Kid: I want a dragon for christmas.
Santa: Be realistic.
Kid: Ok, I want a loyal girlfriend.
Santa: What color dragon do you want?
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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes Christmas Jokes
Friend:I did your mom
Me:My mom dosn't do girl on girl action!
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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes
I would show you what you really look like, but I don't think I'm allowed to pull my pants down and show you my аss!
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Insult Jokes
You got Hillary running for senate. Yeah, that's what America needs -- another white male senator.
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Insult Jokes Men jokes USA Jokes
Someone in class is staring at u
Me: what r u lookin at
Girl: something ugly
Me: Вiтсh. I'm not a mirror.
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Insult Jokes
Your gene pool could use a little chlorine.
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Insult Jokes
When his I. Q. reaches 50, he should sell.
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Insult Jokes
Short kid: Hey tall kid, I bet you don't know who your dad is!
Me: What's the matter? Where are Snow White and the other six dwarves? They're probably celebrating the fact that they lost you! Short kid:(Silence)
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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes Dad Jokes
Tough guy: you are a failure.
Me: just like your dad's condom
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Insult Jokes Dad Jokes
It's scary to think that people like you are graduating from college.
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Insult Jokes
I was in Atlantic City not too long ago. You just walk around, go, 'What in the hеll happened to you?' There are people Picasso would look at and go, 'Hmm, nothing I can do with that.'
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Insult Jokes
Bully:can I see your cheeks?
Me:and can I see your вuтт cheeks.
*burn*
Tucker-
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Insult Jokes
B*tch -if i want to hear from an аrsе id fart
Innocent person- go ahead,its gonna smell better than your breath.
B*tch- ........
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Insult Jokes
Loser: I'm as straight as a line drawn by a ruler!
Me: Sure, you're as straight as a line that is drawn by a five year old.
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Insult Jokes
Cool guy: excuse me is this the loser section?
Dude: No its called FUСК OFF and its located over there.
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Insult Jokes
Student #1: *disturbing the class by looking for something on the floor*
Student #2: Ha, he's looking for his dignity!
Class: *laughs*
- Now a moment of silence-
Teacher: Did you find it?
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Insult Jokes
Hippie friend: What is the meaning of life.
Stupid friend: My diск!!!:
- )
Smart friend: Your right, life is short.
:
- O
:
- O
:
- O
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Insult Jokes Friendship Jokes
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