Kids Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

My cute little Granddaughter asks me, "Grandpa can I have $10 please?"
I said,
"Well sure hun what's it for?"
She says,
"Well you old tightwad every time I ask for a twenty spot you say No!!!"

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Kids Jokes

I told my kids, 'Look, you guys, if someone comes up to you at school and says,
"Is your mom gаy?" Look them square in the face and go, "Why? Does your mom want to date her?"'

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School Jokes Kids Jokes

A little girl complained that she didn’t want to go back to school.
“But why, Lisa?” asked her mother.
“Well, I can’t read, I can’t write, and they won’t let me talk.”

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School Jokes Kids Jokes

Peter went home from school and with full of excitement, looked for his mother.
Peter: Mother, I almost made it as top 1 student of our class for this school year!
Mother: Oh really, I'm so proud of you son! So, you must be the top 2 then?
Peter: No mother, our teacher pointed to my seatmate, had she pointed me, I would have been the top 1 in our class! Almost mom! Almost!

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School Jokes Kids Jokes

A father came home from work one night to find his little boy sitting on the cat, with a pen and paper in his hand.
“Why are you sitting on Felix?” he asked.
“Well, teacher told us to write an essay on the family pet.”

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Office and Work Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Kids Jokes

While I was making a huge batch of snicker doodle cookies, I asked my ten-year-old to read the recipe and ingredients off the box to me, doubling them as he went along.
He did as he was told. His first instruction:
"Preheat the oven to 700 degrees."

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Kids Jokes

In kindergarten, he had a little crush on his kindergarten teacher, which I think is normal. I think for just about everybody, at some point in your life, there's one teacher you had a secret crush on. For me, it's my wife's aerobic teacher.

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Kids Jokes

Finally did what came natural to us: we just stood on a beach and yelled at other people's kids.

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Kids Jokes

Hardnut: Hey kid, you piece of sh*t. fight me you little rat.
Kid: Excuse me but I dont agre with the idea of animal abuse.

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Kids Jokes Insult Jokes Animal Jokes

When the mother returned from the grocery store, her small son pulled out the box of animal crackers he had begged for. Then he spread the animal-shaped crackers all over the kitchen counter.
"What are you doing?" his mom asked. "The box says you can't eat them if the seal is broken," the boy explained."I'm looking for the seal."

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Kids Jokes Animal Jokes

At a Sunday school class the teacher asked a child; do you pray to God before lunch or dinner?
The child said, “No ma'am, my moms a good cook!”

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School Jokes Kids Jokes God Jokes

What do you call a gаy asian?
Chu Mai Wang
What is the point of jewish football?
To get the quarterback.
What do you call an asian guy wearing ancient armor?
A сhinк in the armor.
Where do jewish kids with ADD go?
Concentration camps.
How do you know if a black person has been on your computer?
It’s gone.
Why did the black kid fail night school?
The teacher kept marking him absent.
Why aren’t there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?
There’s a Target on every corner.
What do asian men do when they have erections?
They vote.

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School Jokes Kids Jokes Men jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes

Children would all be brought up perfectly if families would just swap kids. Everyone knows what ought to be done with the neighbor’s kids.

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Marriage and Family Jokes Kids Jokes

When you’re a fат kid you only get to be two things.
Funny, and a goalkeeper.

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Kids Jokes Fat Jokes

What should you do if you are imagining that you are in a jungle and that a lion is chasing you?
Stop Imagining

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Kids Jokes

My daughter will turn 13 in the year 2001. I don't even want to know what kind of sеxuаl practices teenage kids are going to be into by the year 2001. With any luck, everything will be so polluted, she'll be wrapped head-to-toe in plastic and no one will be able to lay a hand on her -- but that's just a father's hope for the future.

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

Teacher: The best medicine is laughter
Kid: I guess your face must be curing the world
Class:OOOOHHHH
By-@ky

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Kids Jokes

The chicken wanted to go out on a Saturday night but could not find a sitter.
What do they do with the kids?
They decided to CARTON them around.

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Kids Jokes Animal Jokes

When your kids are little you're a superhero. When they're teens you're a super villain. After that, your only power is invisibility.

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Kids Jokes

A boy always asks for 50 cents from his mother. So his mother questioned the boy on why he kept asking for 50 cents. The boy replied that his friend told him that if you eat 50 cents worth of peanuts a day you would become smarter. Quickly his mother gave him $5. The boy asks “Why $5”, and the mother replied, “Buy 50 cents of peanut for yourself and buy peanuts for your father with the balance.”

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Kids Jokes Friendship Jokes