Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean.
The tsunamis were killing people.

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If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.

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Curiosity killed the cat. Chuck Norris killed Curiosity.

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Remember the Leia scene from The Last Jedi?
That wasn't the force, it was Chuck Norris resurrecting Carrie Fischer.

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When Chuck Norris went to the beach, he gave the ocean a bath.

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If you woke up this morning, it means Chuck Norris spared your life.

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If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.

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Chuck Norris does not play the lottery.
It doesn't have nearly enough ваlls.

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Chuck Norris once appeared on celebrity wipeout.
They had to end the season after he destroyed the sucker punch wall with his сhin.

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Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation.
Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.

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Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urinе as a canned beverage.
We know this beverage as Red Bull.

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My friend to me "I don't understand why Chuck Norris is the вuтт of so many jokes."
Me to the friend "Well he does kick a lot of them."

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In the words of Julius Caesar, "Veni, Vidi, Vici, Chuck Norris". Translation: I came, I saw, and I was roundhouse-kicked in the face.

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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there; then the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

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Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.

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Chuck Norris is the reason why Einstein's theory of relativity is still a theory.

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Chuck Norris was born in a house he build himself.

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I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf

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