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Facebook Jokes

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(On Facebook)
Me: It's quite hot tonight, might have to sleep with an open window!
39 mosquitos liked your post.
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Facebook share
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I'll change my facebook username to NOBODY so that way when people post сrаррy posts,and i press the like button it will say NOBODY likes this
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Twitter, Facebook adict
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Pizzabestellung im Jahr 2025 Здравейте! Пицария Гордън ли е? Звонит телефон: Звонок по телефону. Un hombre llama por télefono
Hello! Gordon's pizza?
- No sir it's Google's pizza.
- So it's a wrong number?
- No sir, Google bought it.
- OK. Take my order please ..
- Well sir, you want the usual?
- The usual? You know me?
- According to our caller ID, in the last 12 times, you ordered pizza with cheeses, sausage, thick crust
- OK! This is it
- May I suggest to you this time ricotta, arugula with dry tomato?
- No, I hate vegetables
- But your cholesterol is not good
- How do you know?
- Through the subscribers guide. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years
- Okay, but I do not want this pizza, I already take medicine
- You have not taken the medicine regularly, 4 months ago, you only purchased a box with 30 tablets at Drugsale Network
- I bought more from another drugstore
- It's not showing on your credit card
- I paid in cash
- But you did not withdraw that much cash according to your bank statement
- I have other source of cash
- This is not showing as per you last Tax form unless you got it from undeclared income source
-WHAT THE НЕLL? Enough! I'm sick of Google, Facebook, twitter, WhatsApp. I'm going to an Island without internet,where there is no cell phone line and no one to spy on me
- I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport as it has expired 5 weeks ago.
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The Facebook Logo Makes Sense Now
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Life is going too get better guys False information Checked by independent fact-checkers
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I wish Facebook would let you laugh at a Friend request ..
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Stop posting your problems on facebook and start drinking alcohol like the rest of us
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Why is Canada so good at social media platforms like Facebook?
They have so many lakes.
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Two Saudi brothers come to America and one buys a house on the west coast and the other on the east coast. They are so excited about being Americans and during their goodbyes they make a $10,000 bet: in two months they will meet again and the one that is the most American wins.
Two months pass and they meet again.
“Ismael! It’s so good to see you. Take a look. I have a Ford 350 dually 4x4 with lifts and a sticker of a cartoon character рissing on the Chevy symbol. It has a gun rack in the back and my son needs a step ladder to get in. Have you seen him?! He loves McDonalds and he’s already gained 25 pounds! My wife watches Maury and smokes and follows all these Facebook groups. She won’t even vaccinate my baby girl. I surely won the bet!” His brother replies:
“Shut the fuск up towel head”
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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, No mutual friends, Who in the world are you?
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If you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day.
But if you teach a man to fish, he will bore you to death with endless fishing stories and photos of himself on Facebook holding fish.
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Сложете си проблемите на facebook стори и те ще изчезнат за 24 часа
Put your problems on Facebook story, they will disappear after 24 hours...
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Двойките с общи акаунти във Facebook
Couples with a joint Facebook account.
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Mark Zuckerfuck using the time stone to ban me for shiт I posted 3+ years ago
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I read on Facebook today that Mark Zuckerberg has transitioned from alien to a woman (I'm not here to judge) and now would like to be referred to Elona. I read it on FB so it has to be fact.
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Yo' Mama is so sтuрid, she went up to a соw and asked for 2%.
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