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American Presidents Humor

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If Trump played DnD, what weapon would he use?
Fire staff

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

Why did the blonde date hunters?
Because she heard they go deep into the bush, always shoot twice, love to mount their prey and always eat what they shoot.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes American Presidents Humor

What would happen if Donald Trump was about to be assassinated?
Secret Service would shout "Donald, Duck!"

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Duck jokes American Presidents Humor

Did you know Donald Trump is banning pre-shredded cheese?
To make merica grate again

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Cheese jokes American Presidents Humor

So Donald Trump walks into a bar...
And lowers it

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Bar and Bartender Jokes American Presidents Humor

What is the only reason Donald Trump is watching the Olympics?
So he can determine how high Mexican pole vaulters can jump.

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Mexican jokes American Presidents Humor

Can't believe trump tested positive for covid-19
When all he had to do was to not get tested.

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Coronavirus Jokes American Presidents Humor

If Donald Trump becomes President I'm going to Mexico.
Not by choice though.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

How much is Donald Trump's life insurance?
Just one pence.

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Donald Trump Jokes Insurance Comedy American Presidents Humor

What do Donald Trump & the iPhone 7 have in common?
They both think de-porting is the answer when there's no more Jobs.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

Trump wasn't lying about the coronavirus disappearing in April
He simply forgot to say 2021.

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Coronavirus Jokes American Presidents Humor

Donald Trump has decided to take just $1 as his salary for the job of the President instead of the usual 400,000.
That man would do just about anything to avoid paying the taxes.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

My joke was removed for comparing Trump to Hitler
Apparently it's against the rules to make personal attacks on someone even after they've been dead for over 70 years.

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Hitler Jokes American Presidents Humor

The problem with Trump jokes:
Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

What do Apple and Donald Trump have in common?
I would say that they both think de-porting is the answer when there's no more Jobs, but I shouldn't compare apples to oranges.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

‘A Recruit Goes AWOL’
As the sun rose over Parris Island, the senior drill instructor realized that one of his recruits had gone AWOL. A search party was dispatched immediately. After a few hours the recruit was discovered hiding in some bushes. He was sent back to the base and promptly escorted to the drill instructor’s office. The instructor asked the young recruit, “Why did you go AWOL?” ….
….
The recruit replied, “My first day here you issued me a comb, and then proceeded to cut my hair off. The second day you issued me a toothbrush, and sent me to the dentist, who proceeded to pull some of my teeth. The third day you issued me a jоск strap, and I wasn’t about to stick around and find out what would follow that SIR!”

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Office and Work Jokes Masturbation jokes Dentist Jokes American Presidents Humor

North Korea and the martians were fighting about who was going the reach venus first. Trump steps in and says " That doesn’t matter american is going to land on the sun first". The martians and North Korea said “you can’t land on the sun it’s to hot and you will die”. Trump said his brilliant plan that “America is going to land their at night”.

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Military Jokes American Jokes American Presidents Humor

Steve jobs would have been a better president than Donald Trump.
But its a silly comparison really, its like comparing apples to oranges.

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Donald Trump Jokes American Presidents Humor

When Trump borrows $1,000,000 from his dad it's a small loan
But when he donates that much money to Texas, it's a yuuuge contribution
Edit: *Alleged* contribution of $1 million. Also, thank you kind gilder

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Donald Trump Jokes Dad Jokes Banker Jokes American Presidents Humor

Yo mamma’s so hairy, last night I confused here with a bush and рissеd on her!

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Gross Jokes Yo Momma Jokes American Presidents Humor