Fat Jokes

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A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Mom why have I got these huge three-toed feet?"
The mother replies,
"Well son, when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand."
"Okay," said the son. A few minutes later the son asks, "Mom, why have I got these great long eyelashes?"
"They are there to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert,"
"Thanks Mom," replies the son.
After a short while, the son returns and asks, "Mom, why have I got these great big humps on my back?"
The mother, now a little impatient with the boy replies,
"They are there to help us store fат for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without water for long periods."
"That's great mom, so we have huge feet to stop us sinking, and long eyelashes to keep the sand from our eyes and these humps to store water, but Mom ..."
"Yes son?"
"What good does all that do us here in the San Diego Zoo?"
Камили Eines Tages fragt das Kamelbaby seine Mutter: Das Kamelkind fragt den Kamelvater: "Du, Papi, warum haben wir eigentlich zwei Höcker auf dem Rücken?" Darauf der Kamelvater: "Damit speichern wir Nahrung, wenn wir durch die Wüste ziehen." Kamelkind: "Und warum haben wir so lange Wimpern?" Kamelvater: "Damit uns der Wind nicht den Sand in die... Stoi tata wielbłąd, podchodzi jego mały syn i się pyta: - Tato, a po co nam te garby? - No widzisz synu, jak jesteśmy na pustyni musimy mieć zapas wody. Po 5 minutach: - Tato, a po co nam te duże... Genç deve sorar: - Anne niye bizim ayaklarımız bu kadar büyük? Anne cevap vermiş: - Çölde kuma batmamak için. Genç deve tekrar sormuş: - Peki kirpiklerimiz niye bu kadar gür? Anne tekrar cevap... Anne deve ve çocuk deve hayata dair sohbet ederler. Meraklı çocuk deve annesine: - Anne, neden 3 parmaklı, kıllı ve geniş ayaklarımız var? - Devasa çölleri geçerken ayaklarımızın kumlara...
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Politically correct terms for cat owners:
- My cat does not ваrf hairballs, he is a floor/rug re-decorator.
- My cat does not break things, she helps gravity do its job.
- My cat does not fear dogs, they are merely sprint practice tools.
- My cat does not gobble, she eats with alacrity.
- My cat does not scratch, he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator.
- My cat is not a "shedding machine," she is a hair relocation stylist.
- My cat is not a "treat-seeking missile," she enjoys the proximity of food.
- My cat is not a chatterbox, she is advising me on what to do next.
- My cat is not a dope addict, she is catnip appreciative.
- My cat is not a ruthless hunter, she is a wildlife control expert.
- My cat is not evil, she is badness enhanced.
- My cat is not fат, he is mass enhanced.
- My cat is not hydrophobic, she has an inability to appreciate moisture.
- My cat is not underfoot, she is shepherding me to my next destination
(which should always be the food dish).
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