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Gross Jokes

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Why did the cowboy have sh*t in his mustache?
'Cuz he'd been lookin' for love in all the wrong places.
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Gross Jokes Blue Collar Jokes Cowboys and Indians Jokes
Did you hear about the new movie "Constipation?"
It hasn't come out yet.
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Gross Jokes Dad Jokes
An eagle swoops down from the sky and eats a mouse. Three hours later, while the eagle is flying, the mouse sticks its head out of the eagle's вuтт and asks, "How high up are we?"
"About 2,000 feet," the eagle replies.
The mouse replies, "You ain't sh*ttin' me, are you?"
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Gross Jokes Animal Jokes
What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys?
Rhesus Pieces.
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Gross Jokes Animal Jokes
What did the dad say when his son said, ''Dad I'm tired of walking in circles?
''Shut up kid or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."
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Gross Jokes Kids Jokes Dad Jokes
Mommy, Mommy!
"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?"
"Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
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Gross Jokes Kids Jokes
Tofu & Dildos Was haben Sojabohnen und Vibratoren gemeinsam? Hvad har tofu og en dildo tilfælles?– De er begge kødsubstitutter.
Mmmmmmmmmm...
How is a soyburger like a dildо?
They''re both substitutes for meat.
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Gross Jokes Masturbation jokes
Q: What is the last thing to go through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield?
A: Its аss.
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Gross Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Animal Jokes
Did you hear about the мidgет that went into the whоrеhоusе?
He got a тwат in the face.
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Gross Jokes
Q: What's brown and taps on the window?
A: A baby in a microwave!
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Gross Jokes Baby Jokes
Q: Why are men like diapers?
A: They are always on your аss and full of sh*t, and thankfully, they're disposable.
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Gross Jokes Men jokes
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob.
On the wall? Art.
On the floor? Matt.
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Gross Jokes Men jokes
Q: What do you say to a man with five penises?
A: "Your jeans fit like a glove."
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Gross Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes
Two college roommates are about to go to bed.
The guy in the top bunk has his girlfriend sleeping over. To try and keep quiet, they devise a code. His girlfriend will say "tomato" if she wants him to go slower and "lettuce" for him to go faster. As they begin to have sеx, the girl starts to moan, "Lettuce, lettuce, tomato, tomato!" The roommate on the bottom bunk wakes up the next morning and says, "Stop making sandwiches at night. You got mayonnaise in my eye!"
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Gross Jokes School Jokes Sex Jokes
A redneck boy runs into his house and proclaims, "I've found the girl that I'm gonna marry! And she's a virgin!"
Incensed, his father pounds his fist on the table.
"There's no way you'll marry that girl! If she aint' good enough for her own family, she ain't good enough for ours."
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Gross Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Blue Collar Jokes Redneck jokes
I see, said the blind man, peeing into the wind.
It's all coming back to me now.
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Gross Jokes Men jokes
A guy walks into a bar and sees a dog lying in the corner licking his balls. Jimmy was staring at a dog in the park whilst the dog was licking himself in inappropriate parts and said to his dad, "I wish I could do that." Jimmy's dad looked down at Jimmy and said, "Maybe if you ask the dog nicely, he might let you!" These two drunks walk out of a bar and see a dog across the streets licking its own nuts. First guy says "Man, sure wish I could do that." Second says "I dunno, I think I'd pet him first." Dos amigos ven a un perro que se está lamiendo los cojones. - ¡Cómo me gustaría poder hacer eso mismo! - dice uno de ellos -. Y el otro contesta: - Bueno, pero antes intimarías un poco con el... Kaksi ruotsalaista olivat puistossa, kun he huomasivat koiran olevan pusikossa nuolemassa sukupuolielimiään ja sai suurta mielihyvää. - Mitä ihmettä se oikein tekee? kysyi Börje. - Göran, joskus... To menn ser på en hund slikke seg nedentil. Den ene mannen sier: "Jeg skulle ønske jeg kunne gjøre det!" "Virkelig?" sier den andre. "Jeg hadde bare tenkt å klappe den."
Jeremy and Kris walk down the street and see a dog licking himself.
Jeremy says, "Man, I wish I could do that!"
Kris replies, "I think you'd have to pet him first."
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Gross Jokes Men jokes Dog jokes
An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence.
So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts sсrеwing the goat. He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, “Hey, you want a piece of this?”
The Aggie says, “Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?”
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Gross Jokes
Айше и Фатме събирали цвекло. Морков Моркови Πατάτες και γύφτισες Две циганки отишли на полето за моркови и едната изкарала един доста голям морков и казала на другата: Бригада циганки вадят на полето моркови. Една от тях показва на колежката си току-що изваден морков: Циганки вадят моркови на полето. Една от тях показва на друга какъв морков е извадила: C'est deux vieilles paysannes qui ramassent des patates, à un moment l'une d'elles saisit deux grosses patates pleines de terre et dit à l'autre : - Vingt dieux elle sont comme les couilles de mon Victor ! Alors l'autre répond : - Aussi grosses !? - Non, aussi sales ! 2 paysannes ramassent des patates. La première en saisit deux grosses pleines de terre et dit à l'autre : - Vindiou ! Elles sont comme les couilles de mon mari ! - Aussi grosses ?! - Non, aussi sales ! Huguette et Raymonde sont dans les champs en train de ramasser des patates. Raymonde en ramasse deux, les montre à Huguette et dit : - On dirait les couilles de mon René ! - Aussi grosses ? - Non, mais aussi sales ! Två kärringar gick omkring på grönsaksavdelningen när den ena plockade upp en jättegurka och sa: - Den här ser precis ut som bosses pick! Hennes väninna blev mycket imponerad, och efter ett tag... Twee vrouwen staan in de tuin winterpenen uit de grond te trekken. Zegt de ene : 'Ze lijken wel op die van Gerrit'. Zegt die andere : 'Is die zo groot dan?'. Zegt de ene weer : 'Nee, zo vies.'. Deux vieilles copines sont à ramasser les patates a la campagne. Une d'elle, tenant des juliettes en main, dit: "Tu vois Germaine, ces patates me font penser aux couilles de mon Robert." "Quoi?...
Two women are digging in the garden. One pulls out a foot-long carrot and says, "This one reminds me of my husband."
The second woman replies, "Your husband's is that long?"
Her friend answers, "No - that dirтy."
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Gross Jokes Jokes about Women Men vs Women Jokes
Did you hear the one about the cannibal who passed his brother in the jungle the other day?
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Gross Jokes Nationality Jokes Dirty jokes Cannibal Jokes
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