One-Liner Jokes

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Comedys a tough job, man. Ive got friends who got cool jobs. One of my friends, hes a роrnо star. Guess how he got discovered? This girl sat on his lap, and she was like, Ooh, you should do роrnо! Same girl sat on my lap and was like, Ooh, you should tell jokes!

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One-Liner Jokes

I think they named oranges before they named carrots. What are these? Those are orange: oranges. What about these? Oh, sh*t. Long pointies? Well go by shape now?

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One-Liner Jokes

"What is your brother's name?"
Little Jane:
"I don't know yet. We can't understand a word he says."

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One-Liner Jokes

I don't own a big house, but at least I have my legs, ie two man shins.

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One-Liner Jokes

A couple of months ago, I gave my girlfriend some fancy lingerie, and she actually got mad at me. She said, Anthony, I think this is more of a gift for you than it is for me. And I said, If you want to get technical, it was originally a gift for my last girlfriend.

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One-Liner Jokes

Two sperms were swimming along when one says to the other "Man I'm getting tired, how far is it to the uтеrus anyway?" The other sреrм laughs and says "Uтеrus!, we aren't even through the esophagus yet." Submitted by curtis Edited by calamjo, Tantilazing and hottrouble1

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One-Liner Jokes

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Coffee Jokes

Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor. Doctor: Oh, really? Mary: Yes, she tries to prevent me from making her take it!

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

"The man who was shot is named Harry Whittington. He's a high powered Republican lawyer, he was very lucky. They say the only reason that he wasn't killed is he was wearing the body armor that never got shipped to our troops." -- Jimmy Kimmel

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One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes

Did you hear about the blonde man that locked his keys in his car? A: Took him an hour to get his family out w/ a coat hanger.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Cop: So, I’m writing you a ticket for driving alone in the carpool lane.
Criminal: You’re going to feel really sтuрid when you look in my trunk!

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One-Liner Jokes

Which country is filled with very poor singers? Singapore.

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One-Liner Jokes

A cowboy was walking down the street with his new pet dachshund. The passerby asked him why a cowboy would own that kind of dog. The cowboy answered, "Well, somebody told me to get along little doggie."

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One-Liner Jokes Cowboys and Indians Jokes

Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears? A: So she wouldn't get Hearing Aides.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Lady (to her doctor):
"What l am worried about is my height and not my weight."
Doctor:
"How come?"
Lady:
"According to my weight, my height should be 7 feet, 8 inches."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes

What goes "Vroom... Screech... Vroom... Screech... Vroom... Screech?" A blonde at a flashing red light.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Chuck Norris won't fight Justin Bieber because he doesn't hit girls.

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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Chuck Norris knows what the double rainbow means.

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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Chuck Norris shot Bon Jovi in the heart for giving love a bad name.

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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes

All Bill asked for was a little good-night kiss, but Anne haughtily rebuffed him with, "I don't do that sort of thing on my first date!"
"Well," Bill replied with sarcasm, "how about on your last date?"

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One-Liner Jokes