Blonde Jokes - Page 42

Q: What did the blonde do when she couldn't afford a personalized license plate?
A: She changed her name to JKM345.

28 0

How does a blonde spell "farm?"
E-I-E-I-O!!

28 0

Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

A мidgет is riding a bus when a blonde steps on him.
Hey you, brunette, watch where you're going, yells the мidgет.
The blonde looks down and says, I am not a brunette, I am a blonde.
The мidgет replies, Not from where I'm standing.

28 0

Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes

What do spaghetti and women have in common?
They both squirm when you eat them.

28 0

Men vs Women Jokes Jokes about Women Food Jokes Blonde Jokes Dirty jokes

Q: Why did the blonde take more than one pregnancy test?
A: Because she slept with more than one guy.

28 0

Insult Jokes Blonde Jokes

A blonde walks into a drugstore and purchases a pack of condoms. "That will be $1.08, please," says the clerk.
"What are the eight cents for?" asks the blonde. "It says one dollar right here on the packaging."
"Tax," replies the clerk.
"Gee," says the blonde, "I thought you just rolled them on and they stayed put."

28 0

Blonde Jokes Money jokes Drug Jokes Tax jokes

Q: Why do blondes smile when lightning flashes?
A: Because they think their picture is being taken.

28 0

Blonde Jokes

A blonde walks in the ice cream parlor and orders a chocolate ice cream cone.
The clerk tells her that he has no chocolate ice cream, only vanilla and strawberry.
The blonde then orders a pint of chocolate ice cream.
The clerk once again tells her he has no chocolate ice cream, just vanilla and strawberry.
The blonde then orders a quart of chocolate ice cream.
The clerk once again tells her he has no chocolate ice cream, only vanilla and strawberry.
The blonde then orders a half gallon of chocolate ice cream.
The clerk then asks her how she spells van as in vanilla.
She says, V-A-N.
He then asks her how she spells straw as in strawberry.
She says, S-T-R-A-W
He then asks her how she spells fuск as in chocolate.
After a while she says there is no fuск in chocolate.
THATS WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU

28 0

Blonde Jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes Chocolate Jokes

A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing.
The police arrive and ask for a description.
She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him.
The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her.
He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face."
The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report.
She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"

28 0

Police Officer Jokes Blonde Jokes Men jokes Love Jokes

A blonde was walking down the street, carrying a brown paper bag.
She ran into one of her friends.
Her friend asked, "Hey! What do you have in the bag?"
She tells her friend that she has some fish in the bag.
The friend says, "Fish! Well, I'll make you a bet.If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one."
The blonde says, "I'll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I'll give you both of them."

28 0

Friendship Jokes Blonde Jokes

Two blondes were running from the cops as they had just been caught sneeking over the border into Mexico.
They dashed up to a fence and climbed over it, lights and sirens running behind them.
As they arrived on the other side, they came face to face with a long river.
One blonde said to the other. "Here I'll shine this flashlight over the water and you can walk accross the beam of light."
The other said:
"What do you think I am, sтuрid!? I'll get halfway accross and you'll turn it off!"

28 0

Blonde Jokes Mexican jokes Police Officer Jokes

Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.

28 0

Blonde Jokes Dirty jokes One-Liner Jokes

A 65 year old blonde has a baby.
All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family.
When they ask to see the baby, the 65 year old mother says “not yet.”
A little later they ask to see the baby again.
Again the mother says “not yet.”
Finally they say, “When can we see the baby?”
And the mother says, “When the baby cries.”
And they ask, “Why do we have to wait until the baby cries?”
The new mother says, “because I forgot where I put it.”

28 0

Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes Old People Jokes Baby Jokes

When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
After a dye job.

28 0

Blonde Jokes

Be careful never to let a blonde have a coffee break...
It takes too long to retrain her afterwards!

28 0

Blonde Jokes Food Jokes Coffee Jokes

In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror.
But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth if you lie, you disappear.
One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror.
The brunette goes first.
"I think I'm the smartest woman on earth."
"РООF!" She disappears.
The redhead goes up to try.
"I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth."
"РООF!" She disappears.
The blonde goes up.
"I think..."
"Рооf!"

28 0

Jokes about Women Blonde Jokes Restaurant Jokes

What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates?
A mobile sреrм bank!

28 0

Blonde Jokes Banker Jokes

Why do blondes need to have оrgаsмs?
So they know when to stop having sеx.

28 0

Blonde Jokes Sex Jokes

There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom with a pocketful of dollars, and came out with the latest model.
Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming a that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes.
The management apologized and gave her a new car.
Again, after half an hour she came back.
The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineers to see if they could figure out what the problem was.
She put in the first gear... Speed up... Put in second... Third... Fourth... Fifth...
“And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.

28 0

Blonde Jokes Management Jokes

How do you break a blonde's nose?
Place a dildо under a glass table!

28 0

Blonde Jokes