Dirty jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!

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Apple and iPhone Jokes Technology Jokes Dirty jokes Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes Flirt jokes Phone jokes

Did you hear Cher is joining the spice girls?
They're going to call her Old Spice.

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Old People Jokes Dirty jokes Music and Musician Jokes

Whats the difference between Paris Hilton and a bowling ball?
You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!

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What's The Difference Jokes Dirty jokes

boy: spell "me"
girl: M-E
boy: but you forgot the D
girl: there's no D in me
boy: not yet ;)

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Dirty jokes Pick-Up Lines Jokes

"Hey, I have a magic dildо for sale," he says.
"What? There's no such thing," she replied.
"No seriously, if you don't believe me try it out in the bathroom. All you have to say is 'magic dildо my рussy.'"
A bit skeptical she agrees and takes the dildо to the bathroom.
A few minutes later she comes out.
"Wow, that was great!" She says.
She ends up buying the dildо and leaves the store.
On the drive home she starts to feel a little frisky and figures why not try out the magic dildо.
Well she's really enjoying herself.
The car is swerving and she rolls through a red.
She ends up getting pulled over by a cop.
After she rolls down her window she tells him the whole story.
She explains about the magic dildо and the shop.
The cop says, "Magic dildо my аss."

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Police Officer Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Gay and Lesbian Jokes

Hey guys.
Bet your female friend that she can't use both of her elbows to touch her belly button.
Thank me later.

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Friendship Jokes Jokes about Women Dirty jokes

When Viаgrа first came out my wife and I decided to give it a go to see what all the fuss was about.
I popped the pill and waited the 15 minutes and then it was on for young and old.
We timed the performance to the minute and it all finally subsided at 3 hours and 17 minutes.
I asked the missus what she thought and she simply stated that she couldn't understand what all the hype was about for an extra 17 minutes...

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Viagra jokes

What does Barbie use as a тамроn?
A Tic-Tac.

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Dirty jokes

Whats the similarity between getting a bl*wjob from an 80 year old and walking the tightrope ?
In both cases you really dont want to look down !

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Dirty jokes

If you think your life is bad, how would you like to be an egg?
You get laid once in life, you only get eatten once in life, It takes 4 min to get hard, but only 2 min. to get soft, you share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all the only chick who ever sat on your face was your mother.
Pass this to someone who needs a good lay, sorry I mean day.

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Dirty jokes

What do you call a blonde at a golf course?
The 19th hole.

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Blonde Jokes Dirty jokes Golf jokes

Why did the lumber truck stop?
To let the lumber jack off.

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Dirty jokes

Girls are like biscuits - they are tough until they get wet.

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Dirty jokes

Mom: If a boy touches your воовs say "don't" and if he touches your рussy say "stop"?
Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said "don’t stop"

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Boob Jokes

What's the best part about gardening?
Getting down and dirтy with your hoes.

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Office and Work Jokes Dirty jokes

A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to commit suicide," she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also doesn’t want to miss an opportunity, so he asks, "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?" She does, and it is a long, deep, lingering kiss. After she's finished, the tough, hairy biker says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I’ve ever had! That's a real talent you’re wasting. You could be famous. Why are you committing suicide?"
"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl…"

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Dirty jokes Men jokes Sick and Death Jokes Sexist Jokes Cyclist Humor

What do you call a sеx-crazed gаy cannibal?
A head hunter!

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Gross Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

How is parsley like рuвiс hair?
You push it aside to eat, and sometimes it gets stuck between your teeth after meals.

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Gross Jokes Dirty jokes

A man walks into his doctor's office and whines, "Doc, you've got to help me; I've got a strawberry stuck up my аss."
The doctor pulls out his prescription pad and says, "I've got cream for that!"

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Gross Jokes Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes

What do mopeds and fат ladies have in common?
They're both a great ride until someone sees you on one.

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Sports Jokes Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Fat Jokes