Fat Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

Politically correct terms for cat owners:
- My cat does not ваrf hairballs, he is a floor/rug re-decorator.
- My cat does not break things, she helps gravity do its job.
- My cat does not fear dogs, they are merely sprint practice tools.
- My cat does not gobble, she eats with alacrity.
- My cat does not scratch, he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator.
- My cat is not a "shedding machine," she is a hair relocation stylist.
- My cat is not a "treat-seeking missile," she enjoys the proximity of food.
- My cat is not a chatterbox, she is advising me on what to do next.
- My cat is not a dope addict, she is catnip appreciative.
- My cat is not a ruthless hunter, she is a wildlife control expert.
- My cat is not evil, she is badness enhanced.
- My cat is not fат, he is mass enhanced.
- My cat is not hydrophobic, she has an inability to appreciate moisture.
- My cat is not underfoot, she is shepherding me to my next destination
(which should always be the food dish).

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes Political Jokes Fat Jokes

I’m quite fат and have been getting a lot of cyberbullying recently on facebook. Parents can be really cruel sometimes.

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Facebook Jokes Fat Jokes

This guy from across the road was talking to me earlier.
“My wife’s just told me she’s been having an affair with Dave the milkman,” he confided.
“What? That fат ugly fсuкеr I see every morning outside your house?”
“Yes,” he laughed, cheering up.
“Why would Dave the milkman want to fсuк that?”

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Cheating Jokes Fat Jokes

A fат bird started chatting me up in the club last night and I mentioned I’d just had my birthday this week.
“Well, happy birthday, sеxy,” she purred, stroking down my chest. “If I come back to yours tonight, could you put a smile on my face?”
“Probably not,” I told her. “There’s no cake left.”

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Fat Jokes Sarcasm Jokes

I think people should stop picking on fат kids.............
They got enough on their plates !

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Kids Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Fat Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

Just saw a Facebook status of a girl I know:
“Омg! Can’t help it! I’m obsess with Big Macs.”
I commented:
“Oops, you made a spelling mistake.”
She said:
“Haha, it’s obsessed, right?”
I replied:
“No, it’s obese, you fат сunт.”

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Facebook Jokes Fat Jokes Internet Jokes

I was talking to a fат bird down the pub last night.
She said, “Would you call me a taxi?”
I said, “No, you’re more like a 12 seater mini bus.”

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Masturbation jokes Fat Jokes

Yo' Mama is so fат, she can't stand in single file.

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Single People Jokes Fat Jokes