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School Jokes

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little johnny sat in the classroom. the teacher says class if you can tell me who said these quotes, ill let you leave early. who said four score and seven years ago? nancy beats johnny to it and shouts abe lincoln! the teacher says nancy you can leave. who said ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for you? john kennedy shouts out susan. the teacher says very good susan you can leave. johnny says i wish these вiтсhеs would keep their mouths shut. the teacher says WHO SAID THAT?! johnny said tiger woods! can i leave now?
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Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes
You're the reason God created the middle finger.
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School Jokes Insult Jokes God Jokes
Are you talking back to me?!
Yes mom, that's how conversations work.
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School Jokes Office and Work Jokes Insult Jokes
I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
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School Jokes Insult Jokes
Q: What's the first thing elves learn in school?
A: The "elf"-abet!
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School Jokes Holiday Jokes
You might be a redneck if, your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.
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Dad Jokes School Jokes Redneck jokes
Teacher - Get rid of your drink. No drinks in class.
Student - I got it from my doctor he told me to drink it
Teacher - Who's your doctor?
Student - Dr. Pepper
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School Jokes Insult Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes
Teacher: Do you want to spend lunch in my class!?
Me: you asking me out on a date?
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School Jokes Insult Jokes
Yo mama so fат the only reason she took algebra in high school was because she heard there was gonna be some pi.
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Fat Jokes School Jokes Math Jokes Yo Momma Jokes
I think my phone is broken. I pressed home and I'm still at school!
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One-Liner Jokes School Jokes
Little Johnny likes to gamble.
One day, his dad gets a new job, so his family has to move to a new city.
Johnny's dad thinks, "I'll get a head start on Johnny's gambling."
He calls the teacher and says, "My son Johnny will be starting your class tomorrow, but he likes to gamble, so you'll have to keep an eye on him."
The teacher says, "Okay," because she can handle it.
The next day, Johnny walks into class and hands the teacher an apple and says, "Hi, my name is Johnny."
She says, "Yes, I know who you are."
Johnny smiles and says, "I bet you $10 you've got a mole on your вuтт."
The teacher thinks that she will break his little gambling problem, so she takes him up on the bet.
She pulls her pants down, shows him her вuтт, and there is no mole.
That afternoon, Johnny goes home and tells his dad that he lost $10 to the teacher and explains why.
His dad calls the teacher and says, "Johnny said that he bet you that you had a mole on your вuтт and he lost."
The teacher says, "Yeah, and I think I broke his gambling problem."
Johnny's dad laughs and says, "No you didn't, he bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your аss before the day was over."
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Dad Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes
Person 1: Dude your gаy.
Person 2: Actually, I'm as straight as the pole your mom dances on.
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School Jokes Insult Jokes
Police officer: Where were you between 4 and 6?
Me: Kindergarden
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Съдята:
School Jokes Office and Work Jokes Insult Jokes Police Officer Jokes
Them - Your an аsshоlе.
You - I'm glad I'm an аsshоlе because without аsshоlеs like me there wouldn't be shiт like you!
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School Jokes Insult Jokes
I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.
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School Jokes Math Jokes
Teacher: “Who do you think invented dancing, children?”
Little Johnny: “My guess is a big Irish family with just one bathroom.”
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Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes
They say you can’t get a decent job without education.
But look at Albert Einstein – he was a drop-out and still ended up being the first man on the moon!
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School Jokes Men jokes
A student at a management school came up to a pretty girl and hugged her without any warning.
The surprised girl said, “What was that?”
The guy smiled at her, “Direct marketing!”
The girl slapped him soundly.
“What was that?!” said the boy, holding his cheek.
“Customer feedback.”
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School Jokes Good jokes
“Mommy, they told me at school that I have gigantic feet.”
“Let’s talk about this later. Now put your shoes in the garage and wash your hands, dinner is ready.”
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School Jokes
Two teenagers, Fred and Joe, meet after school and Fred is all excited:
“Man I was at the most awesome party this weekend! We went to this dude’s house and guy had toilets made of pure gold!”
“No way!”
“Yes way,” insists Fred, “come with me and check it out for yourself if you don’t believe me.”
Twenty minutes later they’re ringing the doorbell at the place. A middle-aged lady opens and Fred eagerly asks her, “Hi! I’m sorry to bother you but there was a party at your house yesterday and my friend doesn’t believe that you have toilet bowls of pure gold!”
The lady looks at him for a moment and then yells into the inside of the house, “Roger, the pig that shiт in your trombone is here!”
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