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Chuck Norris's urin is said to add 300 horse power when added to your gas.

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Did you hear about the man who spent too much of his company's money on Viаgrа?
Now he's hard up.

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Money jokes Men jokes Business jokes Viagra jokes

One day a blonde and a redhead were playing together over the redhead's house while the redhead's father was out.
The father had a pet parrot, which he did n
ot let anyone else touch.
But, when he left, the girls took him out.
The girls were playing with it, when the blonde grabbed the parrot and accidentally ripped out one of its wings.
“Now you've done it!” the red head yelled at the blonde.
“Go buy him another one just like that, here's some money.”
The redhead went into her piggy bank and gave the blonde $50.
“Okay,” said the blonde, “but it's going to hard to find a parrot with only one wing.”

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Money jokes Blonde Jokes Banker Jokes

Chuck Norris was asked to star in Night of the Living Dead but filming was ended after the zombies were to afraid to be roundhouse kicked in the face.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Computers are like air conditioners.
They work fine until you start opening windows.

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Office and Work Jokes Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes

Q: How long does it take for a workplace bully to come up with a patentable new invention?
A: It depends: If the designer's desk drawer is locked, about 5 minutes, otherwise, under a minute.

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Office and Work Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Vulgar jokes

A lawyer was asked if he likes to become a Jehovah's Witness.
He declined, as he hadn't seen the accident, but replied that he would still be interested in taking the case.

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Religion jokes Lawyer Jokes Communication Jokes

During a recent staff meeting in Heaven, God, Моsеs, and Sаinт Peter concluded that the behavior of Ex-President Clinton and Representative Condit had brought about the need for an eleventh commandment.
They worked long and hard in a brain-storming session to try to settle on the wording of the new commandment, because they realized that it should have the same style, majesty and dignity as the original ten.
After many revisions, they finally agreed that the eleventh commandment should be: "Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff."

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Religion jokes Office and Work Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes God Jokes Political Jokes Heaven And Hell Jokes American Presidents Humor

A six year old comes crying to his Mother because his little sister pulled his hair.
"Don’t be angry," the Mother says, "Your little sister doesn’t realize that pulling hair hurts."
A short while later, there’s more crying, and the Mother goes to investigate.
This time the sister is bawling and her brother says…
"Now she knows."

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Kids Jokes Old People Jokes

When my customer ordered iced tea, I asked, "Sweetened or unsweetened?"
Her answer: "What's the difference?"

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Customer service jokes Stupid Jokes

A man goes to a jewelry store looking to buy a watch.
He looks at a watch called "the George Bush Watch" and asks the sales clerk why there are no hands.
The sales clerk says "you are suppose to read his lips."
He then looks at a watch called the "Ross Perot Watch" and notices that it isn’t running – the sales clerk tells him "it runs, it doesn’t run, it runs, it doesn’t run..."
He then notices a watch called the "Bill Clinton Watch" and sees that it runs, has hands and looks like a pretty good watch.
He asks the sales clerk how much.
The sales clerk replies "$19.95 plus tax, plus tax, plus tax, plus tax, plus tax..."

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Money jokes Men jokes Political Jokes American Presidents Humor

A mother and son were walking through a cemetery, and passed by a headstone inscribed ‘Here lies a good lawyer and an honest man.'
The little boy read the headstone, looked up at his mother, and asked "Mommy, why did they bury two men there?"

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Men jokes Judge and Court Jokes Lawyer Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

One day there was a blind man walking down the street and he smelled oranges, so he bought some fruit.
He smelled some pastries, so he bought some donuts.
Then he walked passed a fish market, took a hard sniff, and said, "Hello ladies!"

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Gross Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes

I bet Rosa Parks killed in musical chairs.

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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Music and Musician Jokes

Why was the computer tired when he got home?
Because he had a hard drive.

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Computer Jokes Programmer Jokes IT jokes

Jimmy was staring at a dog in the park whilst the dog was licking himself in inappropriate parts and said to his dad, "I wish I could do that."
Jimmy's dad looked down at Jimmy and said, "Maybe if you ask the dog nicely, he might let you!"

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Dirty jokes Pet Jokes Dad Jokes Dog jokes

Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients?
They hid their own eggs!

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Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Easter Jokes

I kind a feel sorry for Нiтlеr.
Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.

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Friendship Jokes Hitler Jokes

What’s a man’s ultimate embarrassment?
Walking into a wall with an еrестiоn and hurting his nose.

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Men jokes Sex Jokes

The results of in-depth studies have determined that the most often used sеxuаl position for marriedcouples is the "doggie position".
The husband sits up and begs and the wife rolls over and plays dead.

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Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

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