Newest jokes

Can you name a city where no one ever goes? - Electricity.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Why does the traffic light go red sometimes?
So would you if you had to change in the middle of a busy intersection!

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Teacher:
"You got a zero in the last exam."
Roger:
"I don’t think I deserve a zero!"
Teacher:
"Neither do I. But I can’t go any lower than that."

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Cute little bunny walks into a pharmacy and asks if they have carrot ice cream.
“No. This is a pharmacy. We don’t sell ice cream.”
Bunny leaves. But it comes back the next day and again asks, “Do you have carrot ice cream?”
“No, Bunny! This is a pharmacy. We don’t sell ice cream!“
Bunny leaves – but comes again the next day. And the next day, and so on, until after about two weeks, the pharmacist caves in and personally gets carrot ice cream for the next time the bunny comes.
The bunny does come, and again asks, “Do you have carrot ice cream?”
“Today, Bunny, today we do!” smiles the pharmacist.
The bunny says:
“Well then don't eat it. It tastes horrible!“

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

I have hands but I can never clap. What am I?
The clock.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Little Johnny: Mom, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?
Johnny’s Mom: OK, let’s hear the good news first.
Little Johnny: I got a B in Math today.
Johnny’s Mom: That’s good! And now the bad one.
Little Johnny: That was a lie.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Peter, where did you put the siеvе?
Sorry, mommy, I threw it away. There were too many holes in it.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

What do teachers and clouds have in common?
Everything brightens up when they go away.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

80 chimneys plus 5 chimneys plus 8 chimneys.
What is the result?
Lots of smoke.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Father: And, how do you like going to school?
Son: Well, the going bit is OK, the coming home bit is fine too, but the time in between kind of ruins it!

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

What is the preferred food of runners?
Fast food.

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

Do trains eat? - Well they do go chew-chew…

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Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

What has a 1000 legs but can't walk?
500 pairs of pants.

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What lion hunts under water?
The sea lion.

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How many times can you subtract 9 from 74?
Just once. After that it's not 74 anymore.

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Very Good Riddles with Funny Answers

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If you have 1 cent and you triple it every day, how
Many dollars will you have after 27 days?
82 cents. You only ever triple that one cent you had at the beginning.

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What's got many, many keys – but is
Unable to open any door?
The keyboard.

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