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Cat jokes

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My kids were hungry so I made them burgers from scratch.
They got really upset and started to cry.
Scratch is a sтuрid name for a cat anyway..

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Cat jokes

When I was five, my Dad put Snowballs in the blender to make a slushie...
I miss snowballs, she was a good cat.

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Cat jokes

Where would you park your camel?
The Camelot.
PS Вооzе helped with this and now I'm laughing alone in my apartment
Edit: Went to class, came back, saw this. Me and my cat are thoroughly pleased.

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Cat jokes Superhero Jokes

I asked a librarian for a book about Pavlov's dog and Schroedinger's cat.
She said it rang a веll, but she wasn't sure if it was there or not.

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Cat jokes Dog jokes

A cat walks into a bar.
The bartender says,
"What'll you have?"
The cat says,
"A shot of ruм."
The bartender pours the cat his drink.
The cat slowly pushes the shot off the table.
"Another."

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Bar and Bartender Jokes Cat jokes

I used to be in a band called ‘Missing Cat’
You've probably seen our posters.

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Cat jokes

How is a trans 4-year old like a vegan cat?
We all know who’s making that decision

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Vegan and Vegetarian Jokes Cat jokes

I think my cat might be a communist
He won't shut up about Mao.

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Cat jokes

What do you get when you cross a duck and a cat?
A Chinese restaurant's newest entree!

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Cat jokes Duck jokes Restaurant Jokes

I just gave my cat some 7UP.
Now he’s got 16 lives.

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Stupid Jokes Cat jokes

What’s the difference between a semicolon and a cat?
One has a pause at the end of its clause, the other has claws at the end of its paws.

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What's The Difference Jokes Cat jokes

This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat.
It was obvious that she thought her cat could understand her.
I came to my house and told my dog. We laughed a lot.

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Cat jokes Dog jokes

I went to the library and asked for a book on Pavlov's dog and Shrodinger's Cat
The librarian said "That rings a веll but I don't know if it's here or not."

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Cat jokes Dog jokes

A man walks into a library
And asks the librarian at the info desk if they have any books on Pavlov's dog or Schrodinger's cat. The librarian thinks for a moment before replying "It rings a веll but I'm not sure whether it's there or not."

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Cat jokes

They found a cat on mars...
A live cat was found roaming the surface of Mars. Scientists planned to have the Mars Rover capture the animal to study it but unfortunately while attempting to capture the feline, Curiosity killed the cat.

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Animal Jokes Cat jokes

Schrodinger's Cat recently went on a сriме spree
He's wanted dead and alive

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Cat jokes

My kids cried when I told them I had put gingеr in the curry.
They loved that cat.

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Cat jokes

What do you call a boy cat sleeping on a bed?
Himalayan.
*Be gentle. First post on here.

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Cat jokes

News has just come in that The Mars Rover has discovered a member of the feline species while exploring.
Unfortunately, Curiosity killed the cat.
Edit: this is /u/Onetap1's joke, credit goes to him

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Cat jokes

Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it for ever.
Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.

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Animal Jokes Pet Jokes Cat jokes Dog jokes