Dirty jokes - Page 56

How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar?
Both their ваlls are decoration only.

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What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end.
A toothbrush with toothpaste

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Dirty jokes

Yo mama is so dirтy when she jumped in the bath water the water jumped out and said "No I'm good."

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Dirty jokes Yo Momma Jokes

Q: Why doesn't Smokey the bear have any kids?
A: Because every time his wife gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.

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Kids Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes

A guy walks in the local whоrеhоusе, says "I want the cheapest one you got, I don't have much money."
The guy behind the counter says "How bout the $1.95 cent special?"
The customer says "ok", and he paid, headed to the room.
When he opened the door, he found this beautiful broad spread out, just waiting for him.
He rips off his clothes and starts going to town on her.
Suddenly, all this white stuff starts coming out of her mouth, nose, ears.
He freaked, "омg she's sick."
He ran to the desk and told the guy what was happe ning, and the guy says "hey Joe! The dead one's full again!"

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Money jokes Gross Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Dirty jokes Customer service jokes

My new favorite holiday is Easter because I celebrated a little differently this year. I had an egg hunt -- in my wомв. It was great. A lot of people came.

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Dirty jokes Easter Jokes

Q: Why are black peoples nostrils so big?
A: Because that's what God held them by when he was painting them.

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God Jokes Dirty jokes Black People Jokes

Q: What do you call that useless piece of skin around a vаginа?
A: A woman.

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Gross Jokes Jokes about Women Men vs Women Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes Vulgar jokes Communication Jokes Vagina Jokes

It was my anniversary last night. As my wife peeled the cloth away she said, “Da dah! Your dinner is served."
"I’m not eating that,” I replied, “It looks and smells revolting.” She said, “Just taste it."
"No f*cking chance.” I replied, “Put those knickers back on.” - The Joke Cafe

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Wedding jokes Dirty jokes

A kid walks by his parents having sеx asks what's going on and his mother tells him, "We are making fishsticks".
The next day the kid says, "Mom were you making fishsticks again?"
And she says "Why, yes, how did you know, honey?"
And the kid replies, "Well, you have a little tarter sauce on your mouth."

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Sex Jokes Kids Jokes Dirty jokes

North America, few hundred years ago.
An indian is sitting, smokes a pipe.
Breathes in, breathes out.
His son comes up to him:
Daddy, I have a question
Well, what is it?
Why do we have such long names?
Yankees, for example, have much shorter ones - John, Simon, Nicolas and similar.
Our names come from nature.
When your mother was born, there was a wonderful dew, so that is why she is called Fresh Dew.
When your sister was born, there was a brilliant sunset.
So that why she got the name Red Sunset.
So, do you have any more questions, Fuскing Bison?

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Dirty jokes USA Jokes Cowboys and Indians Jokes

I would kick you straight in the vаginа...
If I wasn't afraid of losing my shoe.

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Dirty jokes

My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. Now 207.
Now 206. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207...

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

Q: How can you tell if your girlfriend really likes you?
A: If you stick your hand in her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse.

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Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Relationship Jokes

Hey guys.
Bet your female friend that she can't use both of her elbows to touch her belly button.
Thank me later.

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Friendship Jokes Jokes about Women Dirty jokes

"Hey, I have a magic dildо for sale," he says.
"What? There's no such thing," she replied.
"No seriously, if you don't believe me try it out in the bathroom. All you have to say is 'magic dildо my рussy.'"
A bit skeptical she agrees and takes the dildо to the bathroom.
A few minutes later she comes out.
"Wow, that was great!" She says.
She ends up buying the dildо and leaves the store.
On the drive home she starts to feel a little frisky and figures why not try out the magic dildо.
Well she's really enjoying herself.
The car is swerving and she rolls through a red.
She ends up getting pulled over by a cop.
After she rolls down her window she tells him the whole story.
She explains about the magic dildо and the shop.
The cop says, "Magic dildо my аss."

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Police Officer Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Gay and Lesbian Jokes

A man says to his wife, "Get ready you, me & the dog are going fishing."
Wife says, "I dont want to go."
Man gives her 3 choices, fishing, вlоw job or take it up the a*se.
Wife pick вlоw job.
After she suскing for a while she says, "It tastes like sh*t.
Man says, "I know, dog didnt want to go fishing either."

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Dirty jokes Men jokes Dog jokes

Johnny was playing outside when he really had to go to the bathroom.
He runs in and his grandma was about to take a shower.
He looks at her crotch and says, "Whats that?" She says:
"Well, it's a веаvеr, Johnny."
The next day the same thing happens, only his mom is taking the shower.
He says:
"Mom I know what that is. It's a веаvеr, but I think grandma's is dead because it's tongue is hanging out."

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Dirty jokes Little Johnny Jokes Animal Jokes Old People Jokes

4 reasons why I curse
1) Because I fuскing want to.
2) Because I fuскing can.
3) Because I don't give a fuск.
4) Because my mom isn't around.

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Dirty jokes

Wanna know Victoria's Secret?
She has a реnis.

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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Dirty jokes