Skip to main content

  • Home
  • Categories
  • Popular
  • Funny pictures
  • Most Popular Jokes
  • Latest Jokes
  • Jokes about Women
  • Religion jokes
  • Office and Work Jokes
  • Gross Jokes
  • Sports Jokes
  • School Jokes
  • Marriage and Family Jokes
  • Kids Jokes
  • Medical and Doctor Jokes
  • Dark Humor Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Animal Jokes
  • Dirty jokes
  • Chuck Norris Jokes
  • Donald Trump Jokes
  • Drinking and Drunk Jokes
  • Putin Jokes
  • Sex Jokes
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Jewish Jokes
  • Police Officer Jokes
  • Weed Jokes
  • Old People Jokes
  • Mother-in-Law Jokes
  • Masturbation jokes
  • Political Jokes
  • Vulgar jokes
  • Genie jokes
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Nurse jokes
  • Psychology and Psychiatry Jokes
  • Knock-knock jokes
  • Scottish Jokes
  • Soccer Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Dad Jokes
  • Gynecology Jokes
  • Rude Jokes
Вицове за приятели Friendship Jokes Freundschaftswitze Chistes de amigos Русский Français Barzellette Tra Amici Ελληνικά Македонски Türkçe Анекдоти та жарти про друзів Piadas de Amigos Polski Svenska Nederlands Vittigheder om venner Vitser om venner Suomi Magyar Româna Čeština Anekdotai apie draugus Latviešu Hrvatski
My Jokes Edit Profile Logout
  1. Home
  2. Friendship Jokes

Friendship Jokes

Most popular in this category
There are only two things to worry about:
Either you are well, or you are sick.
If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about.
But if your sick, there are two things to worry about.
Either you will get well, or you will die.
If you get well, there is nothing to worry about.
But if you die, there are only two things to worry about.
Either you will go to heaven or hеll.
If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about.
But if you go to hеll, you'll be so dамn busy shaking hands with friends, you won't have time to worry.
38 0
0
Dark Humor Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Friendship Jokes Heaven And Hell Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
Me: I just bought Tupacs of Eminems for 50 Cents.
Friend: That's Ludacris. How Kanye West your money like that?
39 0
0
Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Money jokes Music and Musician Jokes Friendship Jokes
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."
"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirтy, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"
"I know all that."
"Then why did you invite a friend for supper?"
"Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
289 1
0
Marriage and Family Jokes Jokes about Women Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes
Q: Why are all black people fast?
A: Because the slow ones are in jail.
0 0
0
Hvorfor er sorte mennesker så hurtige? – Fordi alle de langsomme er i fængsel Kodėl visi juodaodžiai greitai? Nes lėtosios yra kalėjime.
Ethnic and Racial Jokes Friendship Jokes Prison Jokes Black People Jokes
Agnes married and had 13 children.
When her husband died, she married again and had 7 more children.
Again, her husband died. So Agnes remarried and this time had 5 more children.
Alas, she finally died.
Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her.
He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, Lord, theyre finally together.
One mourner leaned over and quietly asked her friend, "Do you think he means her first, second or third husband?"
The friend replied, "I think he means her legs."
43 0
0
Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Kids Jokes Friendship Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
A trio of old veterans were bragging and jokes about the heroic exploits of their ancestors one afternoon down at the VFW hall.
"My great grandfather, at age 13," one declared proudly, "was a drummer boy at Shiloh."
"Mine," boasts another, "went down with Custer at the Battle of Little Big Horn."
"I'm the only soldier in my family," confessed vet number three, "but if my great grandfather was living today he'd be the most famous man in the world." "Really?
What'd he do?" his friends wanted to know.
"Nothing much.
But he would be 165 years old."
87 1
0
Old People Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Military Jokes Friendship Jokes Grandparent Jokes
A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.
He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying, “I regret that I cannot remember which one you are.
Please keep your photo and return the others.”
89 0
0
Verletzter Stolz Αξέχαστη Войник получава писмо от любимата си. Един младеж отишъл в казарма. На еден војник му стигнува писмо од неговата девојка во кое таа му пишува: Dopo un anno di lavoro all'estero, una giovane manager riceve la lettera dal suo fidanzato che è rimasto in Italia. Един войник получава писмо от любимата си: Um soldado no Iraque recebeu uma carta da sua namorada, que dizia o seguinte: "Querido Paul: Não podemos continuar com nossa relação. A distância que nos separa é grande. Confesso que tenho sido infiel por várias vezes desde que você foi embora, e acredito que não merecemos isto! Portanto, penso... Een UNO-blauwhelm, op missie in Afghanistan, ontving onlangs een brief van zijn vriendinnetje in het verre België. Dit stond er in: "Beste Rik, Ik kan onmogelijk onze relatie verderzetten. De... Un militaire reçoit une lettre de sa copine dans laquelle c'est écrit: Salut, je t'écris pour te dire que je te trompe depuis que tu es parti en mission. L'autre homme m'intéresse maintenant plus... Sivilde çok çapkın olan Tolga askerliğini yapmaktadır. Bir gün sevgilisinden mektup alır. Sevgilisi artık ondan ayrılmak istediğini bildirmekte ve fotoğrafını geri göndermesini istemektedir. Çok... Vyrukas, tarnaujantis armijoje, gauna laišką iš mylimos merginos: "... Noriu išsiskirti... grąžink man mano nuotrauką..." . Kareivėlis susinervina, pereina per visus savo tarnybos draugus, surenka...
Jokes about Women Military Jokes Friendship Jokes
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
0 0
0
Friendship Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Relationship Jokes Restaurant Jokes
"My friend is nuts. He thinks he's Bugs Bunny. But I m positive he isn't."
"How do you know he isn t?"
"Because I am."
29 0
0
Animal Jokes Friendship Jokes
Three women are out clubbing and they spot a club that says, "Women Only."
Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.
The first floor has a sign on the door that reads, "All men here are short and plain."
The women laugh and continue up to the second floor.
The sign reads, "All men here are tall and plain."
Still this isn't good enough, and the women proceed to the third floor.
"All men here are short and handsome."
The women still want more and go to the fourth floor, where the sign reads, "All men here are tall and handsome."
This is perfect and the women are preparing to go in, when they realise that there is still one more floor.
They go up one floor and read the sign.
"There are no men here. This floor is built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."
31 0
0
Friendship Jokes Jokes about Women Men vs Women Jokes Men jokes
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp.
They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie.
He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish.
The redhead went first. "I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!"
"Okay," replied the genie.
And off she went.
Then the brunette went.
"I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!"
And off she went.
The blonde started crying and said, "I wish my friends were back here!"
32 0
0
Die Wunderlampe На един самотен остров останали три блондинки. Търговски представител, администатор и управител на една фирма отишли да обядват заедно. A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. Three men stranded on an island. They were walking across the sand when they came across a magic lamp; they rubbed the lamp and out came a genie. The genie said "you have three wishes but make it... Están tres náufragos solos en una isla desierta y se encuentran una lámpara maravillosa. El genio les dice que les va a conceder un deseo a cada uno. El primero dice: - Deseo irme con mi familia y... Eran tres hombres en una isla desierta, y de pronto se encuentran una lámpara mágica, y los tres hombres la frotan, de pronto sale el genio de la lámpara y les dice a los tres hombres que les va a... Three guys are stuck on a deserted island when one of them finds a lamp on the beach. He picks it up and gives it a little rub and a genie pop out. The genie looks at the three guys and says: "I... Esto son tres amigas que se encuentran en una isla desierta, una es morena, otra pelirroja y la otra rubia y se encuentran una lampara y una de ellas dice: - Yo he oído que si se frota sale un...
Friendship Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes
A woman finds out that her husband is cheating on her, so she decides to leave him a present.
When he gets home, he finds an empty house, a bowl of cookies, and a video.
He scarfs down the cookies, and pops in the video.
On TV, he sees his wife suскing his best friend's d**k.
He comes in her mouth, and she immediately spits the jizz into a bowl of cookie dough.
Then she turns to the camera.
"Oh, hello, I want a divorce."
32 0
0
Divorce Jokes Jokes about Women Gross Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Food Jokes Friendship Jokes Cheating Jokes
An elderly couple went to dinner at the home of some friends, also elderly.
After dinner, the wives went into the kitchen and the two men were talking.
One said, “We went out to dinner last night at a really good restaurant. I’d highly recommend it.”
The second man said, “What’s the name of it?”
The first man thought and thought, then said, “What’s the name of that flower you give to someone you love, the one that is usually red that has thorns?”
“Oh, you mean a rose?” said the second man.
“Yes, that’s it,” said the first man.
Then he called to the kitchen, “Rose, what’s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?”
33 0
0
Old People Jokes Men jokes Friendship Jokes Restaurant Jokes Superhero Jokes
Two blondes decide to go duck hunting.
Neither one of them has ever been duck hunting before and after several hours they still haven't bagged any.
One hunter looks at the other and says, "I just don't understand it, why aren't we getting any ducks?"
Her friend says, "I keep telling you, I just don't think we're throwing the dog high enough."
32 0
0
Мутра решил да става ловджия. Αγριόπαπιες Ангелинка отива в магазина за животни. Δυο ξανθιές αποφάσισαν να πάνε για κυνήγι πάπιας, αλλά καμιά απ τις δυο δεν έχει σχέση με το άθλημα. Ώρες μετά που αρχίσανε να... κυνηγάνε, δεν είχαν χτυπήσει τίποτα. Η μια κοιτάζει την άλλη και λέει: - Δεν μπορώ να το καταλάβω αυτό. Γιατί δεν έχουμε καμιά πάπια στο σακούλι ακόμη; - Εγώ στο... Един си купил куче птичар, но след една седмица го върнал. - Защо го връщате? - Не струва! - Как не струва - това е куче медалист! - Станала е някаква грешка - или не може да лети, или не го хвърлям достатъчно високо. Pourquoi les belges ont-ils arrêté la chasse aux canards ? Parce qu'ils n'arrivaient pas à lancer les chiens assez haut. To svensker var på jakt med fuglehundene sine, men hadde ikke hellet med seg. - Jeg tror vi gjør en feil, sa den ene. - Hva mener du? - Jeg tror ikke vi kaster ikke hundene høyt nok! Miksi blondi lopetti linnunmetsästyksen? Se ei jaksanut heittää koiraa tarpeeksi korkealle.
Blonde Jokes Friendship Jokes Dog jokes
Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm.
His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his chum, and finds him playing tennis.
"Incredible!," says his friend.
"Medical science is amazing."
Another month goes by and the same two guys are again at the sawmill working when the same guy gets too close to the spinning blade and this time his leg gets cut off.
Again his buddy takes the leg, puts it in a plastic bag and takes it to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day, he goes down to see his chum and finds him outside playing football.
"Incredible!," says his friend.
"Medical science is amazing!"
Well another month goes by and again the same two friends are at the mill cutting wood when suddenly the same guy bends down too close to the blade and off comes his head.
Well his friend takes the head, puts it in a plastic bag, and heads to the hospital to get it re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his friend but can't find him.
He sees the doctor walking down the hall and says, "Doc, where is my friend? I brought him in yesterday."
The doctor thinks for a minute and says, "Oh yeah, some idiот put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated."
30 0
0
Dark Humor Jokes Office and Work Jokes Gross Jokes Sports Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Science jokes Friendship Jokes Soccer Jokes
An exhausted hunter out in the woods stumbled across another hunter.
Hunter 1: "Am I glad to see you, I've been lost for three days."
Hunter 2: "Don't get too excited, friend, I've been lost for three weeks."
29 0
0
Two deer hunters met in the woods. The first one said to the other, "Boy am I glad to see you, I've been lost for hours." The second deer hunter said, "That's nothing, I've been lost for a week." Изтощен ловец в гората се натъкнал на друг ловец. - Така се радвам се да те видя, изгубих се преди цели три дни. - Не се вълнувай много, приятелю, аз се изгубих преди три седмици.
Hunting Jokes Men jokes Friendship Jokes
There were these two bums and they were hungry when they came across road кill.
The first вuм went down to eat it when he looked up at his friend and said, "Oh I'm sorry, would you like some?"
He replied, "No I think I'll wait."
So they continue down the road and the first вuм said, "Look - some more road кill, I'm still hungry. How about you?"
His friend replied, "No, not yet, I think I'll wait."
The first вuм ate the road кill.
Shortly after, his eyes rolled back and he puked the whole thing back up on the street.
Seconds later, his friend dove in and ate every last slickery drop of the puke.
The first вuм said, "I thought you weren't hungry?"
His friend replied, "I was always hungry, I just wanted a warm meal."
32 0
0
Gross Jokes Food Jokes Friendship Jokes Sick and Death Jokes
Things not to Say to the Cop Who Pulls You Over
10. Your so-called "speed limits" mean nothing to me flatfoot. I live my life one quarter-mile at a time.
9. You again? I thought I lost you at that last red light.
8. Aren't you going to sтriр search me, big boy?
7. I am not the droid you're looking for. You don't need to see my papers.
6. Dаrn! My radar detector must be broken again.
5. You better hurry up with that ticket. Dunkin' Donuts closes in 15 minutes.
4. You're not going to search my trunk are you?
3. How about you watch my friend Ben Franklin while I get my registration?
2. Sorry I was speeding officer, but your daughter said she had to be home by eleven.
1. Hey Barney! How are things in Mayberry?
32 0
0
Police Officer Jokes Office and Work Jokes Friendship Jokes
So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob.
"Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work."
"Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday."
So I call him on his cell.
"What gives, bro,?" I ask.
"Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes."
I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty вееr."
"Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to сrаск open a cold one myself."
63 0
0
Friendship Jokes Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Beer Jokes
One day Sven walks into the local pub and announces, "Well boys Svens is getting married."
As you can imagine all of Sven's' friends were very happy for Sven's good fortune and they asked, "Who's the lucky girl?"
Sven replied, "Well I am a marrying Madge."
Well, this upset all of Sven's friends because Madge was nothing but a sluт, and they all cried.
"Sven you can't marry Madge, she's not a nice girl!"
"Sven replied, "Oh ya, Sven's in love and he's a getting married."
And his friends persisted, "Sven, Madge is a woman of low morals."
Sven just grinned and replied, "Oh ya ya ya, but I love Madge."
Finally, his friends had enough and in unison cried out, "But Sven, Madge has been sсrеwеd by every man in town!"
"Oh ya ya ya," said Sven, "But it's not that big of a town."
64 0
0
Friendship Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Sex Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes
  • Previous
  • Next
Privacy and Policy Contact Us