Kids Jokes

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Teacher asks the student: “Why are you so late?!”
Student: “Well I was crossing the road and suddenly it says: 'School ahead, go slowly'!”

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Kids Jokes School Jokes

Teacher to Paul: “Wake up, Paul! You can’t sleep in class!”
Paul to teacher: “I could actually, it’s just that you’re a bit loud.”

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Kids Jokes School Jokes

Dad on the last day of school: So, where’s your school report, my boy?
Tom: Sorry, I’ll bring it a day later.
Dad: Why?
Tom: I borrowed it to Kevin because he wanted to scare his parents.

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Kids Jokes School Jokes

Grandma asks little Fiona, “Did you have a nice play outside?”
Fiona smiles, “Yeah, I was playing pretend and I was a lovely bird!”
“Oh that’s beautiful. Did you sing nicely?” says Grandma.
Fiona explains, “No, I was eating worms!”

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Kids Jokes

Why don’t snails fаrт?
Because their houses don’t have any windows.

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Kids Jokes

A man arrived in a small country town on Friday. He stayed there for three days and then left on Friday. How is that possible?
His horse was called Friday!

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Kids Jokes

What did the blanket say to the bed?
No fears, I've got you covered!

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Kids Jokes Food Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes Life Jokes

Mother is waking her son: “Paulie, come, wake up, you have to go to school.”
“Aw mom, just a bit more sleep, please.”
“No, it’s really high time, now get up.”
“But I don’t want to. The children annoy me and the teachers are a complete pain!”
“Stop it, now. Get up and off to school with you!”
“Mom, give me two good reasons why I should go to the sтuрid school.”
“Paulie, first of all, you’re 45, and second, you’re the headmaster.”

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Kids Jokes School Jokes

Two ants want to fight an elephant.
The elephant looks at them: “Two on one? That’s not fair!”

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Kids Jokes

What weighs more, a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
A: Neither of them, they both weigh a ton!

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Kids Jokes

A prisoner is finally released, after many years in jail. He stands on the pavement, yelling, "I'm free! I'm free!"
A little kid walks up to him happily and joins, “I’m four! I’m four!"

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Kids Jokes

A child comes home dripping wet.
Mother: What on earth were you doing?!

Kid: We were playing dog with my friends.
I was the tree.

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Kids Jokes Dog jokes

Why was 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.

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Kids Jokes One-Liner Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes Math Jokes

What’s the difference between spinach and boogers?
Kids don’t eat spinach.

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Dark Humor Jokes Gross Jokes Sports Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Kids Jokes Food Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Hitler Jokes Prison Jokes What's The Difference Jokes

What is sticky and brown? A stick!

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One-Liner Jokes Kids Jokes

- Mom! I’m a 3d printer!
- Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you роор.

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One-Liner Jokes Gross Jokes Technology Jokes Kids Jokes

Son comes home and yells: “Moooooooom!!!!”
Mother shouts from the first floor:
“If you want something, come up and tell me properly. I’m sick of your hollering.”
Son goes up and says: “Look, I stepped in dog роор.”

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Kids Jokes Dog jokes

"Mom, where do tampons go?"
"Where the babies come from, darling."
"In the stork?"

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Kids Jokes Dirty jokes Stupid Jokes

Joke for mothers:
When your first child eats some earth, a bit of grass or a worm, you take it to a doctor.
When your second child eats some earth, a bit of grass or a worm, you spit on a hankie and clean it.
When your third child eats some earth, a bit of grass or a worm, you wonder whether it still needs lunch.

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Kids Jokes

I hope the children will never find out why I say ‘oooops…. ” so often when I vacuum their rooms.

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Gross Jokes Kids Jokes Dirty jokes Masturbation jokes