One-Liner Jokes

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“A cannonball is a party for artillerymen.”

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One-Liner Jokes

“Vertical living is flat dwelling.”

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One-Liner Jokes

Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.

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One-Liner Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris was originally cast as Jack Bauer in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to кill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

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One-Liner Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

My last girlfriend used to call my реnis what I thought was a big, powerful, scary nickname. She was calling it a weapon of mass destruction. Sounded cool, but then I found out she was calling it that because she thought my реnis was really hard to find.

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One-Liner Jokes

Female court jesters in the Middle Ages often suffered from minstrel cramps.

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One-Liner Jokes

I bought a plunger the other day. You ever bought a plunger? Its an embarrassing purchase. At first, you think its no big deal. Stand in the line, swinging it. And then you realize everybody knows; you got a situation at home. Nobody buys a plunger on a whim.

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One-Liner Jokes

“The butcher asked if I wanted my meat measured in pounds or kilograms. I said either weigh would do.”

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One-Liner Jokes

“Dispensed means to change from pounds to dollars.”

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One-Liner Jokes

SCUBA enthusiasts. Now there's a divers group of people.

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One-Liner Jokes

The man who hated fake politeness was so renowned, when he died they preserved him in formality hide.

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One-Liner Jokes

Any plans to float a common currency are eurozoneous.

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One-Liner Jokes

A very small boy was trying to lead a big St. Bernard up the road.
"Where are you taking that dog, little man?" asked a man watching the struggle.
"I"m going to see where he wants to go," was the breathless reply.

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One-Liner Jokes

The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

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One-Liner Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

Everyday, Chuck Norris goes for a short walk, just to keep the planet spinning.

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One-Liner Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

Justin Timberlake's concerts feature everything but the kitsch ‘N Sync.

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One-Liner Jokes

So I was in the chemist lab and I said to the assistant, “What gets rid of germs?”
She said,
"Ammonia cleaner."
I said,
"Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”

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One-Liner Jokes

I recovered my stolen car using the serial number and I feel VINdicated.

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One-Liner Jokes

Whenever I shred fruit, I do so with grate a plum.

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One-Liner Jokes

When Arnold says "I'll be back" in the Terminator movie it is implied that he's going to ask Chuck Norris for help.

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One-Liner Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes