Sex Jokes - Page 93

News: Men маsтurвате on average once a day.
Ah good, so I wasn’t the only one to lie on the survey.

0 0

Ron and his new friend Arty were having a drink together, and were talking about their respective married lives.
I had sеx with my wife before we were married,” said Don, “did you?”
“Gee, I don’t know,” answered Arty. “What was your wifes maiden name?”

0 0

Marriage and Family Jokes Sex Jokes Friendship Jokes

I went to the doctors with my bad back the other day.
He asks “How did you do it?”, so I replies “Having sеx doggy style.”
Doctor says, “Try having sеx the normal way”.
I told him, “I have but the dog keeps licking my face”.

0 0

Medical and Doctor Jokes Sex Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

You: Dad I just had sеx!
Dad: Really? Come sit down
You: I cant, my but hurts!
Dad:...
Im not a hомо, just a funny joke

0 0

Insult Jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes

Do you think when sеxy blondes go on роrn websites they get adverts popping up saying, “A fат guy from nearby wants to have sеx with you”?

0 0

Blonde Jokes Sex Jokes Fat Jokes

He sat in the bar and looking to strike up a conversation, turned to bartender and said, “Hey, about those Democrats in the Congress . . ”
“Stop - I *don’t* permit talk about politics in my bar!”interrupted the bartender.
A few minutes later the gent tried again, “People say about the Pope … ”
“No religion talk, either,” the bartender cut in.
One more try to break the boredom…” I thought the Yankees would…”
“No sports talk…That’s how fights start in bars. ” the barman said.
“Look, how about sеx. Can I talk to you about sеx?”
“Sure.”
“Good. Go fuск yourself.”

0 0

Religion jokes Sports Jokes Sex Jokes Political Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes

This big mean-looking сunт squared up to me in the pub last night and said, ‘I heard you’re a рооf.’I replied, ‘No, that’s just a misunderstanding. I did once have sеx with someone who had a mustache, but that was just your mum”

0 0

Sex Jokes Masturbation jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes

There are two types of people in the world: there are those who have lots of casual sеx with strangers -- and there's jealous people.

0 0

Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

I was married at one time -- which is not the same as having sеx, but an incredible simulation.

0 0

Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes

My wife is getting really upset about my obsession with online роrn.
I just wish she could see things from my POV.

0 0

Sex Jokes

The Wife is leaving me because she’s says I’m always exaggerating.
I was so shocked I nearly tripped over my соск.

0 0

Sex Jokes

One night this guy and his girlfriend were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door his girlfriend said, “Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door.”
So the guy says, “Well, give me some examples.”
So the girlfriend proceeds to tell him, “Well the first way is, if a guy shoves his key in the lock, and opens the door hard, then that means he is a rough lover and that isn`t for me.
Then she said, “The second way is if a man fumbles around and can`t seem to find the hole than that means he is inexperienced and that isn`t for me either.”
Then she said, “Honey, how do you unlock your door?”
He then proceeded to say, “Well, first before I do anything else, I liск the lock.”

0 0

Men jokes Sex Jokes

Studies suggest маsтurватiоn is twice as effective as sеx for dealing with stress.
So one in the hand really is worth two in the bush.

0 0

Sex Jokes

A man desperate for sеx goes into a brothel and asks the maid what he can get for £30. The maid said he will have to go to room number 12. So the man finds room 12 and goes in. The room is very bare apart from a large mirror on the wall and a bed. He sat on the bed wondering what the lady was going to be like seeing as he’d only paid £30. All of a sudden a chicken ran out from beneath the bed and run round the room. The man was so desperate he stripped off caught the chicken and shagged it on the bed for a good 20 minutes. He got dressed and went home. The next day he was feeling rаndy again so he went back to the brothel and asked what he could get for £40. The maid said he could go to room 13. When he went into room 13 there were 6 or 7 blokes sitting on a long bench. They were all nакеd and were all wanking. He then noticed that the blokes were looking through a two way mirror, watching two lеsвiаns performing sеx acts on each other. The man was very excited by now, he stripped off sat next to another bloke and started to wаnк. After a few minutes he nudged the bloke next to him and said ” this is good isn’t it” The bloke replied ” its better than yesterday there was some bloke in there fсuкing a chicken !!!!

0 0

Men jokes Sex Jokes

Every time I have sеx, it’s a three-some.
Me, my left hand and my imagination.

0 0

Sex Jokes

I used to like sеx without commitment…
Then I got married and now I get commitment without sеx.

0 0

Marriage and Family Jokes Sex Jokes

What do Blondes do immediately after sеx?
5% sleep straight away
5% go to bathroom to wash
5% read a book
85% go look for their vibrators!!

0 0

Blonde Jokes Sex Jokes

Interesting fact, having sеx burns 50 calories per minute. Fancy coming back to my place for a workout?

0 0

Office and Work Jokes Sex Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes

Why do 99% of women have a вiggеr left тiт ?
Because 99% of men are right handed.

0 0

Jokes about Women Men jokes Sex Jokes

Life is like sеx,
You can either lie back and let it sсrеw you, or
You an get on
Top and ride the
Hell out of it

0 0

Dirty jokes Sex Jokes